Mental Health Mental Illness Support Thread V. How do you feel?

Its funny how You once thought i wanted to control you

High light
Is the time right
Hear the bum saying how its Still too Tight
Oh right
So kind blow my mind
Tripping on moon light with the moon shine in the right time
It will come for the bum
The Lady will be first in line
For the act of oh my god
You werent lying she came three times
Using four fingers on the girl with free mind
Like in past times saying oh right
Take me by Hand gon be alright
I promise it will be More than fine
For the sake of You my soul is fine
Thank You for the poem !
I had to go work a shift and more on the way
but I am sorry I didn't have time to say I love your poem. Allot !!
 
Well if we are having some self reflection here it is. There was once upon a time where I atleast could "get it". Instead of that today we find ourselves numb ala zombified. What I cant take anymore is what Im currently taking aka zyprexa. You just dont get it do you, bitch please theres glue in my skull. I have to try whether my brain works better without zyprexa or if its just wishful thinking.
 
Alcohol is the worst drug of them all. Had a huge fight two days ago with my husband when we were drinking. Now I have a concussion and is too bruised up to go outside. Ugh. Never have this happened on any other drug than alcohol.
I don't want you guys to get the wrong impression of my husband, he never laid a hand on me, just one other time when we also were drinking. And I gave him a few scratshes and bruises too both times so.. Still not ok though but he's no wife beater.
I hate not being able to go outside and I hate being this tired from the concussion. As soon as I lay down I get so tired I'll fall asleep.


And on wednesday there is a new police hearing regarding my abusive stalker ex. The police have found a film that I have to watch to assess if the sex in it was concesual or not. Im worried they only have found one film, since I know now he had the webcam on the whole time every time I was at his place. Oh well, they have fucking 14 TB of material to go through, so they might find more.


Much love to you all blue friends, and im so thankful for this thread, I don't know what I would do if I did not have an outlet like this for my emotions.
 
I'm basically ready to die immediately. It's both mental problem and not.. in That Its experienced as depression but is secondary depression and grief due to dealing w loss of my life due to chronic illnesses
 
Alcohol is the worst drug of them all. Had a huge fight two days ago with my husband when we were drinking. Now I have a concussion and is too bruised up to go outside. Ugh. Never have this happened on any other drug than alcohol.
I don't want you guys to get the wrong impression of my husband, he never laid a hand on me, just one other time when we also were drinking. And I gave him a few scratshes and bruises too both times so.. Still not ok though but he's no wife beater.
I hate not being able to go outside and I hate being this tired from the concussion. As soon as I lay down I get so tired I'll fall asleep.


And on wednesday there is a new police hearing regarding my abusive stalker ex. The police have found a film that I have to watch to assess if the sex in it was concesual or not. Im worried they only have found one film, since I know now he had the webcam on the whole time every time I was at his place. Oh well, they have fucking 14 TB of material to go through, so they might find more.


Much love to you all blue friends, and im so thankful for this thread, I don't know what I would do if I did not have an outlet like this for my emotions.
Sorry to hear about what you are going through, I hope things get better for you and your bruises heal up quick.

Yes alcohol is the worst drug, that’s why I don’t drink anymore.
 
I'm basically ready to die immediately. It's both mental problem and not.. in That Its experienced as depression but is secondary depression and grief due to dealing w loss of my life due to chronic illnesses

It's tough sometimes to find things to live for. Things worth living for. But we have so many things not yet experienced that it'd be a shame to leave life before trying them, IMO at least.

Hope tomorrow is better. There's a chance it will be.
 
Just finished with my psychologist. It's the last week of my RO-DBT therapy course. She's suggested that we start on "grief work" after this. I've already started Googling the principles of Grief Work therapy 😂
 
I've been majorly depressed for basically my entire life. I've become numb to it. Yet days like this I can't.

I woke up at 8 and layed in bed until 1pm just wishing I could sleep forever. Usually when it gets this bad I force myself to run but it's raining and cold as shit.

I'm in the belly of a nihilistic beast dissolving away.

So tired of myself and my choices.

Days like this fucking suck.... I really hope it gets better.

I don't have any money for drugs and that's probably a good thing.
 
Iiiieeee.... ditched my last RO-DBT group skills class. I didn’t miss one all year until now. I just... what’s the point? We’re not going to learn anything new. I’ll have to say sentimental goodbyes to people which is fucking awkward. Fuck it, I’m going to sleep in.

... is it too early to drink? It’s too early to drink. Imma do it.
 
Ey, @SAT4N_420, everything alright? How is it going with the drug testing and court and stuff?
Well, it's been rough. My court date got delayed until January so it'll be a while before I find out what they're going to do to me. The stress from all of this hasn't been doing much good for my mental well being and I've been taking Phenibut and Kratom to keep me from giving into the temptation of taking anything that might show up on a drug test.

I'm sorry you had to go through that with your husband. How are you feeling now? If you're still not feeling well then it might be good to go to a doctor to make sure that everything is ok because concussions can be dangerous.
Also, I'm stll hoping things go well for you in your police hearing.
 
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