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Mental Health Mental Illness Support Thread V. How do you feel?

CoastTwoCoast said:
It sucks you've been struggling with anxiety, but glad you're feeling better than before! I have some borneo yellow and borneo red left, it's not enhanced though, but good for relaxation.
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Thanks :)
Right when I started having issues with anxiety, the first 1 1/2 years, it was quite bad. Am still not where I was before (doesn't look too good to get there seeing as it's been a few years) but definately more bearable.
Plus no one really knows I have (had) these issues, so it sometimes gets a bit strenuous to deal alone with it.

I've never heard of a yellow strain, my vendour doesn't have that. What effects does it have?
Dunno about the enhaced, it seems to depend on the batch, quite often it's seems to have exactly the same strength as the normal red (just thought I'd try it again, haven't had it in a while).
 
Jack123456 said:
Thanks :)
Right when I started having issues with anxiety, the first 1 1/2 years, it was quite bad. Am still not where I was before (doesn't look too good to get there seeing as it's been a few years) but definately more bearable.
Plus no one really knows I have (had) these issues, so it sometimes gets a bit strenuous to deal alone with it.

I've never heard of a yellow strain, my vendour doesn't have that. What effects does it have?
Dunno about the enhaced, it seems to depend on the batch, quite often it's seems to have exactly the same strength as the normal red (just thought I'd try it again, haven't had it in a while).
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Yeah, anything enhanced can go either way. A lot of times I think "enhanced" kratom is just a way for them to charge more money for little effect, unless it's UEI. That's powerful stuff, but drives your tolerance way up.
I've read about people who got hooked on only taking UEI. They spend tons of money on it a month, totally strung out and withdrawals are a bitch. I prefer to mostly stick to the regular leaf.

Yellow strain is mellow, not my favorite. I prefer the red, green and white borneo. My vendor had a deal on four borneo strains. You get an ounce of red, yellow, green and white for a low price. Green and white borneo are the more stimulating kinds and red is more relaxing.

Have you ever seen a professional about your anxiety? It must be difficult dealing with it alone. At least we have this board to vent and share experiences.
 
Sorry, but what's UEI? Not familiar :)
Gotta say, never had a problem with tolerance (been taking Kratom since 3 1/2 years, 2years daily). Never had to up dosage (rather gone down, though I started with stupidly high doses for someone new to it). Tapering/reducing at the moment - am at 6g from formerly around probably 15-20 (more.towards the higher end) and still feel pretty much the same buzz right now. Maybe I'm just weird, though :)

I like green and red, white didn't give me much, though I only tried it once or twice and maybe just got a weak batch or something.

No, I haven't seen anyone, besides some doctors for the physical symptoms.at the beginning, though they didn't pick up on it. I'm (stupidly) hesitant to make it official, also job-wise that might be a bad move. And there might be a certain loss of self-image involved. All invalid reasons (besides job probably), but well, it is how it is :)
Also I'm still.functioning pretty high, even did during the worst time.(dunno how), so.there's that self-deceiving.consolation.
 
Jack123456 said:
Sorry, but what's UEI? Not familiar :)
Gotta say, never had a problem with tolerance (been taking Kratom since 3 1/2 years, 2years daily). Never had to up dosage (rather gone down, though I started with stupidly high doses for someone new to it). Tapering/reducing at the moment - am at 6g from formerly around probably 15-20 (more.towards the higher end) and still feel pretty much the same buzz right now. Maybe I'm just weird, though :)

I like green and red, white didn't give me much, though I only tried it once or twice and maybe just got a weak batch or something.

No, I haven't seen anyone, besides some doctors for the physical symptoms.at the beginning, though they didn't pick up on it. I'm (stupidly) hesitant to make it official, also job-wise that might be a bad move. And there might be a certain loss of self-image involved. All invalid reasons (besides job probably), but well, it is how it is :)
Also I'm still.functioning pretty high, even did during the worst time.(dunno how), so.there's that self-deceiving.consolation.
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Lower doses of kratom is best. UEI is Ultra Enhanced Indo kratom. It only takes a little bit to work and it's really pricey. It makes tolerance sky high so it's best not to get it often...or not at all.

Well, hopefully you will reach out for help one day. It's nothing to be ashamed of. That's up to you of course. You're able to function and have a job in spite of the anxiety so that's great! :)
 
CoastTwoCoast said:
Lower doses of kratom is best. UEI is Ultra Enhanced Indo kratom. It only takes a little bit to work and it's really pricey. It makes tolerance sky high so it's best not to get it often...or not at all.

Well, hopefully you will reach out for help one day. It's nothing to be ashamed of. That's up to you of course. You're able to function and have a job in spite of the anxiety so that's great! :)
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Damn, just checked... my vendor does actually have something similiar. 100:1, with the price 30x as high as what I'm paying right now... o_O
 
I can tell the PMDD emotional symptoms are surfacing. I've been crying so easily watching movies. A situation at home made me cry out of nowhere in my room. Every emotion is intense, but it's been mostly ok. I feel fine tonight. I've been trying to take enough Gabapentin and phenibut to make myself numb. haha

I hope every one else is having a good evening! :)
 
CoastTwoCoast said:
I can tell the PMDD emotional symptoms are surfacing. I've been crying so easily watching movies. A situation at home made me cry out of nowhere in my room. Every emotion is intense, but it's been mostly ok. I feel fine tonight. I've been trying to take enough Gabapentin and phenibut to make myself numb. haha

I hope every one else is having a good evening! :)
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Hope you're feeling better soon.

Re the UEI: No, it's just called a 100:1 extract, but I'm also not US based (and non-English speaking country) so maybe there's an issue of translation or something.
The reviews on the site don't read too excited though.
 
Jack123456 said:
Hope you're feeling better soon.

Re the UEI: No, it's just called a 100:1 extract, but I'm also not US based (and non-English speaking country) so maybe there's an issue of translation or something.
The reviews on the site don't read too excited though.
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Usually anything 100:1 is not worth the money. It's overpriced and hardly works. It's not a translation issue. Try to google UEI kratom and the country you're in, see if a vendor pops up.

...and thank you! I'm feeling good tonight. :)
 
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CoastTwoCoast said:
Usually anything 100:1 is not worth the money. It's overpriced and hardly works. It's not a translation issue. You could google UEI kratom and find a vendor who has it if you were interested. It's UEI kratom no matter what country.

...and thank you! I'm feeling good tonight. :)
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Hm, I think I'll leave it since I've just reduced my daily dose to a third of what it was. Not the best time to get into the ultra potent stuff :)
But maybe I'll try it sometime. Although I have taken amounts before where I was nodding off while sitting and in the midst of doing some stuff or other, so I guess the UEI would be somewhat the same just with less plant material in your stomach? :)
 
Jack123456 said:
Hm, I think I'll leave it since I've just reduced my daily dose to a third of what it was. Not the best time to get into the ultra potent stuff :)
But maybe I'll try it sometime. Although I have taken amounts before where I was nodding off while sitting and doing something, so I guess the UEI would be somewhat the same just with less plant material in your stomach? :)
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Yes, I definitely wouldn't recommend you getting into UEI kratom. I was just kinda curious if you could find it in your country. You're right, it's way less plant material, it doesn't take much. I'm not a fan of it because if you take a little too much, it can make you nauseas. You're better off without it. I've been sticking to regular leaf. Once in a while, I'll get liquid kratom. It's a better buzz. It raises tolerance though so it's a nice treat every now and then...as long as you get a good brand. Some of them suck, but we're not allowed to talk brands here.
 
That sounds about right. I take Prozac and it does help. Nice for someone to understand
CoastTwoCoast said:
I'm sorry you've had bad experiences. I'm going through PMDD this weekend because I don't have any refills. I have to get to the doctor next month in order for him to write me more prescriptions. With all the moving around I've been doing, I couldn't get to him sooner. Fucker could've still helped me out. I have phenibut, kratom and gabapentin to help with mood lift and anxiety. It shouldn't be too bad. If it is, I'll just lock myself away like a werewolf and tell every one to leave me alone. haha
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I called the OBGYN today and confirmed my appointment for August, then asked for birth control ASAP. The secretary told me "He's out of town. He'll be gone until Thursday." I really wanted to say "Bitch! I'm not trying to hear that!" I put on a more serious tone and raised my voice like "Out of town?! So you're telling me there's nothing he can do? This is an emergency!" Then after I was on hold for a minute she came back and said "I can do this refill for him just once." Ok whatever, just get me my birth control.

These people (in the medical community)..if you don't speak up for yourself, you won't get what you need. She tried to write me off talking about he's out of town.
 
Funny you should mention birth control. The last time I remember feeling ME was when I was off it. For a good, little while. But then that wears off. Especially after over a decade of having it around. Some forms increase your shrewd qualities and ability to wake early. I might have opted for those sooner had I known those were the side-effects, but weight gain is harder to manage granted.

I feel right as rain. A little apprehensive about being underslept, but I don't wanna dwell on that fact for too long. I've got some legal matters to tend to in the near future, so I'm looking forward to that. really. I'll suffer in silence. I should be fine so long as things are treated delicately.
 
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I missed my happy pills for something like 3 days running so I am finally back to my old self. I've got a lot to organise in the next 48 hours but it isn't too overwhelming. I wish I had a man in my life. I'm going through a trough. I need someone to prop me up a bit. I'd like someone kindly and patient. But trust takes a million years to accrue and not nearly as long to breach. I'm just wishing I had someone to check ideas with, to keep me on the ball and on my best behaviour. Also someone that has proven their longevity in my life would be a bonus. I am asking too much. Single life it is.
 
I’ve had mental health problems since I was 15 well that’s my earliest memory of having depression symptoms.

I would never see a doctor as I didn’t believe there was a fix but when I saw a doctor in July 2017 who gave me time off do stress leave by September 2017 I had to quit my job as my anxiety and depression escalated and I was diagnosed with “severe anxiety and depression disorder”

I have been suffering anxiety quite badly this week like I use to two years ago, where is comes in overwhelming waves so I am off to the doctor this week TO sort my shit out. It nearly killed last time and I can’t go through that again. Hoping she changes my meds to something that actually works because I don’t think Prozac ever really has.
 
@hyroller - Hey, I find when I "do me", I become the best version of me, and then attract the best version of others. In other words, when you are working on yourself and not even looking for love, love comes your way. It truly does, IMO.

@Nightrider19 - How many different meds have you tried? Don't give up.. it can take a while, and most always does, but it's worth it to find that special combo.
 
@madness00

To many to count, i should really know but it hasn’t been consistent my worst was Effexor.

I think mine is situational.

At one point my doctor said medication won’t work you need things to calm down. The thing is things will never be simple I just need to learn to deal with chaos like I use to.
 
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