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Mental Health Mental Illness Support Thread V. How do you feel?

madness00 said:
... i'm sure she likes a smile on yours.
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You know what, madneoo000, you are right; I had forgotten that we could smile together.
What's the point of one sided joy?
Fuck I gotta rework everything. I went from one side (mine) to the other (hers). Where's that balance again? haha
Keys to the kingdom, I say.
Thanks
<3
 
I like that the list has a lot of things you can do in any place and time, like recalling a happy moment or making plans.

I miss dancing. I'm really good at it too, because whenever I do I'm drunk and my opinion is the only one that matters at the time. :P
 
CoastTwoCoast said:
@PtahTek Is the overspending and emotional instability caused by drug use? I hope you're ok.



Oh I feel your pain. PMDD used to ruin 2 weeks out of every month because the awful emotional problems would start a week before my period. The depression felt like my whole family died, doom and gloom, suicidal. Birth control cleared it all up. I take the pill so that I don't get my period anymore. I haven't experienced PMDD in a year and I wish I started birth control a decade ago. It would've saved me a lot of torture. Have you considered birth control? I take Cryselle.



LOL! That's fucked up. You just reminded me of the time my lil' bro' brought the class hamster home. It escaped out of the cage. I tried to pick it up and the lil' fucker bit me. It had a hold of my finger. I freaked out and when I shook my hand free, the hamster flew up against the wall. Ooops. hehe I've read guinea pigs don't bite so that's good.
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Birth control can go either way. My experiences have been negative. I really dont want to make it worse.
 
Unfortunately today my pain is unmanageable with the Oxycodone I am prescribed and my depression always gets worse due to this. Feeling mentally weak as I cannot do what I want to do. Lacking motivation and desire. At least I have UFC on TV to keep my mind busy. Tomorrow is a new day and I am just happy I am still here.
 
Ain'tLifeGrand said:
Birth control can go either way. My experiences have been negative. I really dont want to make it worse.
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I'm sorry you've had bad experiences. I'm going through PMDD this weekend because I don't have any refills. I have to get to the doctor next month in order for him to write me more prescriptions. With all the moving around I've been doing, I couldn't get to him sooner. Fucker could've still helped me out. I have phenibut, kratom and gabapentin to help with mood lift and anxiety. It shouldn't be too bad. If it is, I'll just lock myself away like a werewolf and tell every one to leave me alone. haha
 
madness00 said:
What would you like to do, if you could?
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I used to box and worked out daily. The fact that pushups leave me in so much pain brings me to tears thinking about it you know? Feel like a waste of space now and just hurts knowing I don't have the control of my life I once did. Almost feel useless
 
It sucks having to leave behind things we love, but like you said, tomorrow is a new day. I bet there are hundreds of things out there that are still in your capabilities than you could learn to love.

I can't imagine the pain + the depression, that of course must be difficult. They potentiate each other though, so kill one off at a time. Chunk it into pieces.

I like your avatar.
 
madness00 said:
It sucks having to leave behind things we love, but like you said, tomorrow is a new day. I bet there are hundreds of things out there that are still in your capabilities than you could learn to love.

I can't imagine the pain + the depression, that of course must be difficult. They potentiate each other though, so kill one off at a time. Chunk it into pieces.

I like your avatar.
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I truly appreciate your positivity brother! And thanks so much man, I actually find peace in collecting Michael Myers masks and such so I have an extensive collection! And you are right. I try my best to bring the pain down but unfortunately today it is a bit too much and the Oxy isn't managing it. Thankfully my anxiety and depression are well managed with Celexa and Klonopin and I still have 1 more Oxy to take to sleep. Thank you again man. Just needed to briefly vent and sometimes it is really hard to separate the pain and depression and it all makes me feel worthless. But I definitely am grateful to have my life and thank you for reminding me there are still things I can conquer throughout the day and I am not completely lost
 
CoastTwoCoast said:
It shouldn't be too bad. If it is, I'll just lock myself away like a werewolf and tell every one to leave me alone.
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I hear ya. If I ain't feeling it MF better not come a knocking. Might get their feelings hurt. It's not intentional but If one doesn't see me I may not wanna be seen.
The kratom helps with the pain and mood lift. This alone can get me up and looking life in the eye... though I may not like what I see it helps me deal with it in a more creative way. Relatively pain free and less anxiety is enough to put me back in the work force.
Of course there are times when I step outside the box but my days are structured and mostly predictable.
 
PtahTek said:
I hear ya. If I ain't feeling it MF better not come a knocking. Might get their feelings hurt. It's not intentional but If one doesn't see me I may not wanna be seen.
The kratom helps with the pain and mood lift. This alone can get me up and looking life in the eye... though I may not like what I see it helps me deal with it in a more creative way. Relatively pain free and less anxiety is enough to put me back in the work force.
Of course there are times when I step outside the box but my days are structured and mostly predictable.
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What's your favorite type of kratom? I'm glad it helps you as well.
 
CoastTwoCoast said:
What's your favorite type of kratom?
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I get this super green maeng da from an online vendor that never gets tiring. Have a few different strains/colors but most seem to effect the same except the chocolates and reds (which take me down).
CoastTwoCoast said:
I'm glad it helps you as well.
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Me, too. :)
Some get little from kratom where some are sensitive (like me) by the subtle "love" of this herb.

Do not want to hijack this thread with kratom so gonna leave off here.
I will interject that it has made a great impact on my mental state/stability like no other substance.
Peace
 
PtahTek said:
I get this super green maeng da from an online vendor that never gets tiring. Have a few different strains/colors but most seem to effect the same except the chocolates and reds (which take me down).

Me, too. :)
Some get little from kratom where some are sensitive (like me) by the subtle "love" of this herb.

Do not want to hijack this thread with kratom so gonna leave off here.
I will interject that it has made a great impact on my mental state/stability like no other substance.
Peace
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Yes, maeng da is my favorite as well for energy. I usually get red maeng da. Green Bali is good for relaxing. Kratom has done the same for my mental state. :) I'm still keeping to myself today though. haha It's just like that sometimes. Gonna call my OBGYN tomorrow to ask him again to write me more refills until I can see him next month. It's just birth control, it's not a narcotic. He needs to stop being an ass.
 
I have mindanao green which is really euphoric, quite nice buzz, and borneo red vein (got the.enhanced one as well at the moment) for.the last dose of the evening.

In keeping with the theme of this thread. Had a bit of an anxiety issue today (I pretty much always have one, just not as bad as it used to be).
Convinced myself my left cheek was bigger than the right one/swollen throughout the day (bullshit), which was unpleasent but still baseline anxiety. Then felt a tingling in my right hand in the evening, sort of paresthesia with a feeling of coldness. Quickly checked whether left hand was the same (because getting an apoplex was always a main source of anxiety) - it wasn't but quickly developed to be. Tingling in the face rounded that up. Got an hour or two of happy reminiscence of what more pronounced anxiety felt like (what a pleasent year when I felt like this 24/7). Now it's a bit better but also had another 2g of Kratom.
 
Jack123456 said:
I have mindanao green which is really euphoric, quite nice buzz, and borneo red vein (got the.enhanced one as well at the moment) for.the last dose of the evening.

In keeping with the theme of this thread. Had a bit of an anxiety issue today (I pretty much always have one, just not as bad as it used to be).
Convinced myself my left cheek was bigger than the right one/swollen throughout the day (bullshit), which was unpleasent but still baseline anxiety. Then felt a tingling in my right hand in the evening, sort of paresthesia with a feeling of coldness. Quickly checked whether left hand was the same (because getting an apoplex was always a main source of anxiety) - it wasn't but quickly developed to be. Tingling in the face rounded that up. Got an hour or two of happy reminiscence of what more pronounced anxiety felt like (what a pleasent year when I felt like this 24/7). Now it's a bit better but also had another 2g of Kratom.
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It sucks you've been struggling with anxiety, but glad you're feeling better than before! I have some borneo yellow and borneo red left, it's not enhanced though, but good for relaxation.
 
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