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  • EADD Moderators: Pissed_and_messed | Shinji Ikari

MDPV Megathread 9: The thrill of the chase

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Ben So Furry said:
Don't do it Nicklazz. Get more MXE if anything. You've been doing so well without it mate. Come on Brother you can do this. Believe. <3
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Yea you right mate, should really buy something ells, and mxe is a good choice, but my mind is fuckin craving for mdpv, so much. But have to fight it now.. Haven't ordered anything yet.



QuasiStoned said:
Hey Nick I've been having some real cravings myself. I just remind myself about all the bad things that happen to me on apvp, and how OVERALL unpleasant the experience is. It ain't worth the meager euphoria from the first couple toots of vapor. Sometimes I think I actually had some fun snorting it but I just know I'd end up busting out some foil and going hogwild.

I really could lose my job if I touch it again. Just would take the wrong person to notice me in and out of the bathroom. No one shits that much, lol. Having spent a considerable time sober, the personality change is lighting fast too and I broadcast strong vibes of being a tweeker.
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I feel ya Quasi, the little fun you get out of it aint the risk worth the damage in your life it can make + the most of the binge is pure horror/fucked up shit.

Stay strong friend, we have too!


Albion said:
Best weapon against the cravings is to keep your mind busy, so that the cravings have fewer chances to surface in your mind. This usually involves just getting out and about for me, doing different things in different places with different people. It's monotony that drives the craving for MDPV.
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I know, keep the the mind busy, but I got different kinds of anxiety so im home alone all the time allmost :/
 
I'm staying strong bro! For as much as I complain about cravings I really think I'm done.

I got 26 bucks all loaded on a card and good for an order but there's no way in HELL I'm spending it on apvp. I quite like the synthetic noids, some are even better than cannabis imo. That's where my money is going, I will get so much more pleasure out of smoking some noids. Nice and relaxing. None of this strung out for days on pyrovalerones, fuck that!
 
Congrats Quasi. I know the felling. You just KNOW deep down it's all over and no matter how much you crave there is this resolve in your gut that you won't be ordering or using any ever again.

Great stuff. Welcome to the club. Feels good don't it?

Life starts to taste all that sweeter and is a bit easier to follow from here on in my friend. Boring, maybe but better. Well done.

<3
 
I really don't know if I've reached that stage myself, Ben. I do wonder though cos have had cravings - even opportunities to order - since my last major run and have fairly deliberately avoided 'em aside from vague ponderings in here. It doesn't feel like it's over and out for me in peevworld... but it also doesn't feel like I'll be heading back into the kinda usage I usaged ferra while (quite a considerable while) back there. I think the magic has kinda gone. At least in the sense that I know for sure (more or less) that any significant peev use for me now would be essentially "Head straight to Loonyville, do not pass Go, do not collect £200".

That last big one just broke me in every conceivable way. And I stayed broke for months afterwards. Physically, mentally and emotionally I'm (comparatively) fine now. At the time I was sure I'd never come back from that place and, frankly, I'm still amazed I did. I found a load of ramblings I wrote during that last big run recently. Is kinda strange to read back now. And definitely a good reminder that I don't wanna be back there again.

On t'other hand, I <3 peev with all my <3. That hasn't changed at all. If it were here now I would not be typing this cos I'd be vaping that. I honestly don't know which I'd prefer to be doing but am mostly quite pleased to be doing the former. I'm not ruling out any further uber-runs - at all - but I'm also not planning any. In all honesty, a big part of me is craving like you wouldn't (well, actually would) believe of late. Life is shit and it won't be improving so why not? I'm in no hurry though. To go back to that annoyingly true 12 Step bullshit stuff Quasi brought up recently: "I'm not using today and for today that is enough".

Well done so far and the very best of British to all my fellow fiends teetering on the brink at the moment <3
 
GLad you popped in Shambles. never wrote any ramblings but I did use to write "Stop using apvp" on pieces of paper. As though I'd see it later and it would stop me from using it in the middle of a run. Phhhfffttt like that does any good, lol.

I see foils laying around and it makes me feel kind of weird. It's like that foil has no value now but when on PV my entire world shrinks down to a piece of foil. Seeing the foil makes me feel uneasy because I do remember the constant monotony of chasing on foils.

I had a real addiction to just watching it vaporize. I never played around with bongs and such because I really wanted to see it. I loved everything about it, how I could gauge how it was gonna taste and feel by the color of it and size of the blob. Sounds kind of weird but I've heard some meth addicts get hooked on watching the meth vaporize so I guess it happens.

PV does something to me where I have a lot of trouble coordinating my hands and eyes to the foil after a while and I start inevitably burning it. At least with a regular bic.

I dunno. I want it but life is easier without. I'm just not interested in feeling like a total shithead anymore. I'm growing out and building far warmer relationships with coworkers and people too. PV makes me want to avoid social interaction, I'm content to sit around and vape and vape and vape. Going out into the world is annoying at first and then outright difficult near the end of a run. And then the crash keeps me anti-social for weeks.
 
I went to rehab... have been off (and on) PV since mid april. Had a bag of 2 grams recantly that i managed to spill all out couse i went insane. Got taken in to psyck ward x 2 on this PV and it was a hell of a ride. I have moved into a huge nice lovley apartment, but have no internet yet.

Had alpha-pvp for a week inside the walls of rehab, and i have managed to obtain 5 grams alpha after i got home (but 3 grams was taken by the cops)... Buhu..

So recently i have been so low IV'ng speed and meth, smoking PV rests on foil. Managed to order 2 gr pv and 1 gr alpha today. I just hope i manage to behave like before rehab once they arrive. No more paranoia!! Andi need this post. I will read all the new enteries tonight before bedtime (yes there is bedtime and food in my life now). And i like it!
 
Anatrica said:
I went to rehab... have been off (and on) PV since mid april. Had a bag of 2 grams recantly that i managed to spill all out couse i went insane. Got taken in to psyck ward x 2 on this PV and it was a hell of a ride. I have moved into a huge nice lovley apartment, but have no internet yet.

Had alpha-pvp for a week inside the walls of rehab, and i have managed to obtain 5 grams alpha after i got home (but 3 grams was taken by the cops)... Buhu..

So recently i have been so low IV'ng speed and meth, smoking PV rests on foil. Managed to order 2 gr pv and 1 gr alpha today. I just hope i manage to behave like before rehab once they arrive. No more paranoia!! Andi need this post. I will read all the new enteries tonight before bedtime (yes there is bedtime and food in my life now). And i like it!
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Bloody hell, you did a-pvp whilst in rehab?

Glad you are OK though :)
 
QuasiStoned said:
GLad you popped in Shambles. never wrote any ramblings but I did use to write "Stop using apvp" on pieces of paper.
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Hehe. Funny you should say that... Small sample from the back of me peev diary...

To Do:

1. Slow down
2. Fix sleep = Fix Me
3. Sleep, rest, eat, wait, think
4. Repeat steps 1-3 only better

--------

Must: Send PV away to fix me. EZ... zzz...see?

--------

1st - Just fukking send the shit away
2nd - Just fukking do it
3rd - See above

--------

Things to do: Send letter
Problem? Stamp and ability to write an address. And find clothes to wear to the post box that aren't rotting off me

--------

How to fix a me (Feeds 1, Serves Variable)

You will need:

Sleep (optional)
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There's rather a lot more but you get the idea :D
 
Haha I didn't get as deep into MDPV as a lot of people on here but even so that diary sample looks uncannily familiar!
 
Good to hear from you Anatrica :)

But not good to hear you have been IV speed and meth, you going to IV pv and a-pvp too?
 
Course i'm gonna IV the PV ;)

But mostley i'll stick to vaping i bet. I only do that with speed since it's not vapeable :p I miss vaping so much it's in my dreams each bloody night.
I've lost so much in costums latley. Bought that 20 grams a-pvp, 10 gr going on 20. + 5 grams + 5 more + 6 more all fucking going to hell....
So i hope my lousy 2 gr pv and 1 gr alpha (n some sample 4MePPP) will arrive with no problem.
 
Anatrica said:
Course i'm gonna IV the PV ;)

But mostley i'll stick to vaping i bet. I only do that with speed since it's not vapeable :p I miss vaping so much it's in my dreams each bloody night.
I've lost so much in costums latley. Bought that 20 grams a-pvp, 10 gr going on 20. + 5 grams + 5 more + 6 more all fucking going to hell....
So i hope my lousy 2 gr pv and 1 gr alpha (n some sample 4MePPP) will arrive with no problem.
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IV mdpv its sounds so fuckin nuts to do, I would not dare thats 100% =D


About my mdpv cravings/thinkin of ordering it guys:

I did not do it, I ended up ordering some Ethylone that was on sale, so why not, lets try that. Should tho' have ordered some more mxe instead but fuck it, it aint pv Im getting so its all good <3
 
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your choices are definitely getting better nicklazz! You're due a slap on the back, well impressed by your self control and I think you're on the way to better things! Keep it up mate <3
 
Thanks knock, means a lot to me <3 . And yea im getting more in control these days, just the cravings are going mad insane, but they can go fuck off Im not buying!
Going to do my best moving forward.
 
I dream about this stuff all the god damn time. It's weird how it calls to me the longer I've been away, sending messages in my sleep and invading my mind periodically throughout the day.

Some dumbshit on one of the other forums told me exactly what I've been doing wrong when it comes to vaping apvp. I was saying how apvp doesn't live up to mdpv and he went into detail on how to vape it and yep I've been fucking it up. I always use whatever I have on hand and it's usually a bic lighter and foil.... Not the way to go and I knew I was always overheating it.

It really made me fucking crave like crazy because I know I've always been overheating the material a bit and he seemed to imply that boiling the apvp even a tad ruins it. He said if you get dilated pupils, you fucked it up. Well I was walking around constantly with blurry ass vision and dilated pupils.

*sigh* I worry I'm gonna cave eventually. But for now, still keeping my nose clean of it. And trying to recall with sufficient force how bad off I get.

See this shit is so sneaky, I'm trying to convince myself that the reason I had such a bad time is because I wasn't doing it properly.

Flame size was critical and I rarely had an adjustable lighter. Even when I did, turning the flame down small enough would end up superheating the flint and melting the plastic around it, resulting in a useless lighter. I do know I got some proper hits, tasted like candy. But those cheap adjustable lighters always fucked up on me fast.

Apparently a hemp rope lighter is part of the equation, much easier to control a flame on. Glass or super duper thick foil is also part.

The fiend in me has definitely been 'roused from slumber with all I've learned. But the logical part of me knows better.

If only I'd never tried mdpv :/
 
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If only. I think that all the time. If only I'd never taken that first drug. My life would be better. I'm sure. No looking back though. Onwards and upwards fiends.

I promise you it gets easier and life gets better. I'm living proof. The 'euphoric recall' that seems to go on forever does fade eventually. Takes an age but it does leave. Keep on keeping off folks. If that's what you want. <3
 
QuasiStoned said:
I dream about this stuff all the god damn time. It's weird how it calls to me the longer I've been away, sending messages in my sleep and invading my mind periodically throughout the day.
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Same here mate, its hell. It will not let us be alone, even not when we sleep. Its madness..
 
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