Let's hear some good insults

[MDMAhead]

That pause before Andy Parsons delivers a line is deliberate!!! It's all part of his delivery, which, in my opinion, is excellent!!! I have to admit that I didn't get him the first time I saw him, but now he has me in stitches every time. I actually think he's a more skilled comedian than Frankie Boyle, in that Andy can have me on the floor with laughter without being crude, whereas pretty much all of Frankie Boyle's jokes are crude (although don't get me wrong, I am a big Frankie Boyle fan too).

Andy Patterson can't move his head without moving his full upper-body in the same directon.

Who's Andy Patterson?

 

[Bare_head]

twat face and cunt head are quite common ones around my area... i love those as they roll of the tounge

do americans use bastard?

 

[Too many doses]

Oh yeah we you bastard, lol. Its amazing how diverse the insults are there, here it is just combine random swear words like bullshit or motherfucker, if I said knob jockey here people would just look at me weird as they are that stupid ,lol.

 

[felix]

hey TMD, yer maw's seen more pricks than a second hand dartboard.

and she's been cocked more times than Davy Crockett's rifle. :D

 

[cletus]

..............or cocked more times than Elmer Fudds shotgun

 

[Too many doses]

hey TMD, yer maw's seen more pricks than a second hand dartboard.

and she's been cocked more times than Davy Crockett's rifle. :D

lol

 

[WeLoveSpace]

Yer maws got a fanny like a wizards sleeve.

 

[ChinbarWhalloped]

Yer maws got a fanny like a wizards sleeve.

Like throwin a sausage down william street.

 

[WeLoveSpace]

Puts me in the mood for some bawdeep.

Anyone game?

 

[Riklet]

I can't remember where I read/heard it, but there's a brilliant chinese insult which goes along the lines of...

"if I threw a coin into your mum's cunt, it'd take a week before it made a sound!"

Now that is a PALMFACE! :D

On the topic of Andy Parsons, I think he just has weird facial expressions. Dude's funny....

 

[Too many doses]

^ahahaha thats hysterical lol.

 

[chrisdahl]

^haha nice thought that. I'll be telling mum what you said.

Back on topic - I've always found it funny when referring to someone being ugly as fuck or spotty, as having a face like a welders bench.

It's more for spotty people. You ever seen a welders bench?

 

[chrisdahl]

whereas pretty much all of Frankie Boyle's jokes are crude (although don't get me wrong, I am a big Frankie Boyle fan too)

Hugh Dennis(Jeremey Kyle lookiealikie), who is in mock the week with Boyle, is so much funnier, and he seems to have a range of different styles... Strange though, because he's the most boring comedy actor ever.

 

[wibble]

cunty mctwatface

 

[Tranced]

For good insults, try watching Mock The Week (or anything with Frankie Boyle in it). He opened one of his stand-up shows by saying (to a member of the audience):

'You look like someone shaved a monkey and dragged it through TopMan'

haha, legend. Last night he said Cheryl Cole looks like someones used a twiglet to try and unblock a bath plug.

"you're trying too hard" would work pretty well in response to some of these

 

[cletus]

You ever seen a welders bench?

Many, many times and all were ugly as fuck.

 

[samb834]

I think 'dickhead' is an understated word. Simple and to the point...

I also think saying somones mum has a fanny like a clowns pocket, or something to that effect, is a good one...

 

[technocat]

"Your a stain on the underpants of humanity" is always a good one

 

[ollieideal]

pair of tits like two parecetomal on a plate,
ur so old ur pussy's haunted

 

[Public//Enemy]

"Away n take yer face for a shite"