• H&R Moderators: VerbalTruist | cdin | Lil'LinaptkSix

January 2017 Getting/Staying Clean/Sober Thread v. Goodbye Holidaze, Hello 2017!

Got 4 days today....shit is great yet rough at the same time.
 
Sounds like a pretty standard kick to me! Keep up the good work/may your days recovering multiply in number!
 
Got 4 days today....shit is great yet rough at the same time.

Congrats, man! Not sure what drugs you're clean from...are you detoxing and sick? In any case, those first days are so rough. Keep up the awesomeness!!
 
52 days only now for me feels like a fuckin whole lot more! Crank this shit up!

 
Last edited:
Congrats, man! Not sure what drugs you're clean from...are you detoxing and sick? In any case, those first days are so rough. Keep up the awesomeness!!

No, the last thing I used was DXM last tuesday, cocaine the day before that. So no withdrawals, other than the psychological aspect. I feel great off chemicals, but still always feel the need for something. I've never made it more than 57 or 58 days clean/sober since I started using/drinking like 12 years ago. So I'm trying to smash that record. My goal is 90 days, not that I'm planning to use after that, but I wanted to set a goal and acheive it. Also since I've never made it that long, I don't think I've allowed my receptors and neurotransmitters and such to fully stabilize, which they say takes at least a year.(and possibly never fully happen, but at least get better)
 
No, the last thing I used was DXM last tuesday, cocaine the day before that. So no withdrawals, other than the psychological aspect. I feel great off chemicals, but still always feel the need for something. I've never made it more than 57 or 58 days clean/sober since I started using/drinking like 12 years ago. So I'm trying to smash that record. My goal is 90 days, not that I'm planning to use after that, but I wanted to set a goal and acheive it. Also since I've never made it that long, I don't think I've allowed my receptors and neurotransmitters and such to fully stabilize, which they say takes at least a year.(and possibly never fully happen, but at least get better)

Seems like a good plan. Realistic and doable. ... Oh, and I'm with you on the whole brain healing thing... trying like hell to abstain long enough to bring my brain chemistry back into something approximating normal function.

Good luck!
 
No, the last thing I used was DXM last tuesday, cocaine the day before that. So no withdrawals, other than the psychological aspect. I feel great off chemicals, but still always feel the need for something. I've never made it more than 57 or 58 days clean/sober since I started using/drinking like 12 years ago. So I'm trying to smash that record. My goal is 90 days, not that I'm planning to use after that, but I wanted to set a goal and acheive it. Also since I've never made it that long, I don't think I've allowed my receptors and neurotransmitters and such to fully stabilize, which they say takes at least a year.(and possibly never fully happen, but at least get better)

I used dissociatives, mainly DXM and MXE, very, very regularly for months while I was tapering off and recently abstinent from methadone. It's taken me like six months to get to a place today where I'm not using them at all, not even infrequently anymore. It is amazing how long term sustained use of that stuff, particularly DXM (and I'm not even talking about DXM and X OTC combos), is a blessing and, if you get to comfy with it, quite the curse. While under the influence DXM basically made behave like a high function autistic individual. It was very frustrating sometimes, living in the normal world full of "normal" people and not being able to interact with them according to their "normal" social norms, yet knowing full well what they were and what was expected of me. Of course, there were many beautiful, truly life changing things about these experiences that words cannot description. Feelings of connection and flow like few I've ever known.

All that said, I did noticed some very subtle, yet very significant side effects and a kind of withdrawal (it wasn't really withdrawal, it was more like I could feel my body/brain chemistry re-equalize to a state of no exogenous NMDAr antagonists post DXM/MXE). The most noticeable thing, and the reason I was so easily able to stop and not interested in using it, is because by the end constant and regular use of them totally dehydrated by body (to the point where when I had a physical they almost put me in the hospital). Something related to this (I'm not to clearly on what each organ dose anymore, outside a handful of them of course) is that my diss use totally fucked up my kidney. You can only imagine the horribly scary color and, yes, texture of my urine. More so when I was actually using them, but still, weeks later, some of it has linger (though it's gotten much better; my kidney no longer hurts, my urine is no longer grainy or cloudy, etc).

Scary shit. I know not everyone will react this way, and firmly believe that occasional diss use is safe and not very problematic either on the brain or psyche. But sustained, constant, or very regular use will undoubtably become problematically harmful. It's just a matter of time (six months, a year, three years, who knows, but one will run into problems with their diss use at some point if used irresponsibly like I was).
 
I used dissociatives, mainly DXM and MXE, very, very regularly for months while I was tapering off and recently abstinent from methadone. It's taken me like six months to get to a place today where I'm not using them at all, not even infrequently anymore. It is amazing how long term sustained use of that stuff, particularly DXM (and I'm not even talking about DXM and X OTC combos), is a blessing and, if you get to comfy with it, quite the curse. While under the influence DXM basically made behave like a high function autistic individual. It was very frustrating sometimes, living in the normal world full of "normal" people and not being able to interact with them according to their "normal" social norms, yet knowing full well what they were and what was expected of me. Of course, there were many beautiful, truly life changing things about these experiences that words cannot description. Feelings of connection and flow like few I've ever known.

All that said, I did noticed some very subtle, yet very significant side effects and a kind of withdrawal (it wasn't really withdrawal, it was more like I could feel my body/brain chemistry re-equalize to a state of no exogenous NMDAr antagonists post DXM/MXE). The most noticeable thing, and the reason I was so easily able to stop and not interested in using it, is because by the end constant and regular use of them totally dehydrated by body (to the point where when I had a physical they almost put me in the hospital). Something related to this (I'm not to clearly on what each organ dose anymore, outside a handful of them of course) is that my diss use totally fucked up my kidney. You can only imagine the horribly scary color and, yes, texture of my urine. More so when I was actually using them, but still, weeks later, some of it has linger (though it's gotten much better; my kidney no longer hurts, my urine is no longer grainy or cloudy, etc).

Scary shit. I know not everyone will react this way, and firmly believe that occasional diss use is safe and not very problematic either on the brain or psyche. But sustained, constant, or very regular use will undoubtably become problematically harmful. It's just a matter of time (six months, a year, three years, who knows, but one will run into problems with their diss use at some point if used irresponsibly like I was).



Well said Bro! Im glad you got that behind you ive seen some destruction from DXM mainly from dosing too high they looked fucked up not in any control its probably why i never tried it in wds. And i have also read alot of organ damage to liver, kidney and pancreas.
 
No, the last thing I used was DXM last tuesday, cocaine the day before that. So no withdrawals, other than the psychological aspect. I feel great off chemicals, but still always feel the need for something. I've never made it more than 57 or 58 days clean/sober since I started using/drinking like 12 years ago. So I'm trying to smash that record. My goal is 90 days, not that I'm planning to use after that, but I wanted to set a goal and acheive it. Also since I've never made it that long, I don't think I've allowed my receptors and neurotransmitters and such to fully stabilize, which they say takes at least a year.(and possibly never fully happen, but at least get better)


congrats! bro! bust that 90 days and keep going, I dont believe that shit they say about taking a year to fill your own recepters naturally im 53 days since wds after 22 years on ops everyday and im 85% there. With lots of exercise weight lifting, supplements good music cranked with headphones you can get there much sooner. My bigger problems have been with insomnia, bowels that cant figure out what to do after wds. Good luck
 
No comments on two great Maiden videos or did everybody think they were pics probably cause my old ass coudnt figure out how to link them right that was my best attempt lol just click on pics
 
No comments on two great Maiden videos or did everybody think they were pics probably cause my old ass coudnt figure out how to link them right that was my best attempt lol just click on pics

Oh, I watched em, TLD. Love the spandex and the fog machine. More seriously tho, I always thought maiden's bassist was an absolute badass.
 
Seems like a good plan. Realistic and doable. ... Oh, and I'm with you on the whole brain healing thing... trying like hell to abstain long enough to bring my brain chemistry back into something approximating normal function.

Good luck!

Thanks alot! I'm definitely determined, but cravings are a bitch. I'm just trying to focus on how much clearer my mind is, and other positives, and just taking it one day at a time.(It's an old cliche, but one that really does seem to help.)

I used dissociatives, mainly DXM and MXE, very, very regularly for months while I was tapering off and recently abstinent from methadone. It's taken me like six months to get to a place today where I'm not using them at all, not even infrequently anymore. It is amazing how long term sustained use of that stuff, particularly DXM (and I'm not even talking about DXM and X OTC combos), is a blessing and, if you get to comfy with it, quite the curse. While under the influence DXM basically made behave like a high function autistic individual. It was very frustrating sometimes, living in the normal world full of "normal" people and not being able to interact with them according to their "normal" social norms, yet knowing full well what they were and what was expected of me. Of course, there were many beautiful, truly life changing things about these experiences that words cannot description. Feelings of connection and flow like few I've ever known.

All that said, I did noticed some very subtle, yet very significant side effects and a kind of withdrawal (it wasn't really withdrawal, it was more like I could feel my body/brain chemistry re-equalize to a state of no exogenous NMDAr antagonists post DXM/MXE). The most noticeable thing, and the reason I was so easily able to stop and not interested in using it, is because by the end constant and regular use of them totally dehydrated by body (to the point where when I had a physical they almost put me in the hospital). Something related to this (I'm not to clearly on what each organ dose anymore, outside a handful of them of course) is that my diss use totally fucked up my kidney. You can only imagine the horribly scary color and, yes, texture of my urine. More so when I was actually using them, but still, weeks later, some of it has linger (though it's gotten much better; my kidney no longer hurts, my urine is no longer grainy or cloudy, etc).

Scary shit. I know not everyone will react this way, and firmly believe that occasional diss use is safe and not very problematic either on the brain or psyche. But sustained, constant, or very regular use will undoubtably become problematically harmful. It's just a matter of time (six months, a year, three years, who knows, but one will run into problems with their diss use at some point if used irresponsibly like I was).

Yeah, I used DXM way too much at different times of my life. At one point daily for quite awhile. Daily use definitely fucked with me. Too disconnected from reality, not eating or sleeping enough. It can be a tough one to stay away from for me as I every visit to the store there it is.
 
Last edited by a moderator:
Honestly, once I came to terms with how it was affecting my physical healthy, it hasn't been hard not using it. In fact, the more time that has gone on, the more I have noticed just how much it has fucked up my various bodily symptoms, the less and less I could even consider using it again any time soon.

I forgot to mention I had also been using ketamine and PCP quite a bit. Frankly I think the PCP was what exacerbated everything and sped up all my diss use coming to a close. I mean, it isn't like real PCP I have access to, it's wet-sherm-dip. Fucking formaldehyde and PCP combo, fucking horrible stuff!

One day, I do look forward to using something like ketamine again, but not anytime soon, this I know.
 
I only tried DXM once...I drank a bottle of "Dayquil Cough". That was an interesting and somewhat unpleasant experience...I ended up projectile vomiting off my front porch due to the unbearable syrupy menthol aftertaste, and spent the next several hours feeling like I was high on some kind of weird stimulant...that felt worse than normal stimulants. That, and blurry vision.

Other than that I didn't really get much from it.

I also tried MXE when that was making the rounds, a couple times actually, and that was a strange dysphoric experience, too...I ended up giving the rest of the MXE powder I had away to friends. But MXE seems like literally one of the most popular drugs on Bluelight...people rave about that shit. I guess I just don't like dissociatives for some reason
 
Only like 1/3 of people who try stuff like DXM/MXE/ketamine/etc end up actually enjoying it. And only like 1/3 of those people will go on to use it regularly. It took a long time of very infrequent experimentation before I was able to enjoy it. Once one does come to understand how to use it though, such substances are very amazing things. For one thing, it would have been incredibly more difficult than it was for me to move on from my love and use of opioids.
 
Hey all just checking in. Still being a good boy. My couple experiences with DXM were interesting but didn't really leave me wanting more. I remember watching Battle of the Bulge and feeling like it went on for the entire day and not much else.
 
Hey all just checking in. Still being a good boy. My couple experiences with DXM were interesting but didn't really leave me wanting more. I remember watching Battle of the Bulge and feeling like it went on for the entire day and not much else.

Hell yeah, man! You're doing great.
<3
Sim
 
Top