my gf broke up with me. life is just wonderful. the pain hasnt even hit me yet. somebody help me
Man I talk about this from time to time here but at one part of my life I was a regular member of the seduction community in CNJ.
And at another point of my life I was running my own lair and dealing with this shit a lot. But what would basically happen is men from all walks of life would come to the lair freshly suicidal, and my job was not only to help them overcome their divorce, but to take them out into the real world and make them realize theres really no "rules" to the game. And what I mean by that is almost any man could have any woman he wants.
You will read this question again, but if you had 10 gorgeous women standing in front of you right now, and you knew you could sleep with/date anyone that you chose, would you even remotely be feeling any pain right now?
I just want you to realize the role of social skills in breakups.
There are 2 situations.
A man with little social skills breaks up with his gf. He feels like there is NO WAY he will ever find another women like her (one-itis we call it) and the idea of proactively seeking a new partner is too overwhelming to him. But its more overwhelming in the respect that he doesn't know what to do. He doesn't know how to act, he doesn't know what to say. He just got dumped, and in all likelihood has been putting up with more shit than he should, but he still decided to stay with said woman because he lacks fundamental social skills to attract the women he really desires.
Situation 2
A man WITH social skills breaks up with his gf. He feels bad but realizes its "his strategy" that brings women into his life. He has no reason to really slip into that dark place because he KNOWS its the game that will bring another women into his life. And he knows its the game that brought his previous gf into his life.
He has no real reason to worry, because he knows BY EXPERIENCE that there is ALWAYS a better girl out there than the one he was with. He has a mentality of abundance, and is comfortable in his ability to attract new partners. Because of this, this man will get over the break up fast and be where he wants a thousand times quicker.
Which man do you think you are?
Social skills are like cooking skills, music skills, driving skills, ANY other skill in this world. They can be learned, and learned rather fast (at least in the seduction community where its the main focus).
Women are NOT mysterious beings that you need to waste your entire life figuring out. One you date a certain number of women you realize most of them are the same. They ALL have thier problems/flaws. And they are ALL very much susceptible to the same attractive forces.
But I will tell you this. The same way many men are weak to physical looks, women are weak to characteristics of social status. Not social status as in popularity, you do not have to be remotely popular to be good with women. I mean the genetic core traits of what biologically attracts women.
I can write lists and lists of things that 90% of women are biologically attracted to. Remember there was a time back in the day when humans didn't speak to each other, and we became hypersensitive to certain cues that we still look for today. In fact, these cues are the majority of what women look for still today. We evolved over MILLIONS OF YEARS of evolution. Its only the tiniest fraction of a percent that we've actually been able to speak words and communicate.
And you prob wouldn't believe me, but WHAT you say is NEVER as important as HOW you say it. In fact, there are ways to say things that overide most social norms.
There will always be a man who directly propositions a woman for sex and gets rejected. And there will always be a man who is accepted. Therefore its not WHAT they are doing, but how its being done.
I don't mean to indulge you with all this dating lingo. And I'm definitely NOT a dating coach, I focus primarily on what attracts and what doesn't. I don't really give a shit about dates.
For where you're at right now. I recommend this read to almost everyone I meet online.
It will help take a lot of questions you have right now about why she broke up with you, and why you're feeling like shit, and turn them into a very easy to understand list of concepts and rules.
I will post it in the next post, read it, and if you have any questions feel free to pm. If this whole dating thing is too much for you, maybe cause you have other more dominant issues in life, thats fine too. But I have a particular weakness for men fresh out of breakups. I've seen guys smiling and making out with women in less than 24 hours out of their break up, and it will work wonders for your self perception and confidence. Or at least to keep moving forward with the social skills.
G/luck!
with some water if you can't chew good