since stopping my injections of invega sustena (xeplion) I suffer all the time and end my life so much the suffering is so strong. I tell myself that if I hang myself or open my veins it will be long and painful so I would like to kill myself with cyanide or another product so that my death is painless. I cannot find cyanide so I tell myself that I should perhaps accept a long and painful suicide. I have not yet nothing to try but I would really like to finish
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- Thread starter ocean
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Robi
Bluelighter
no, please think things thru, you dont want more pain, im glad you are expressing your thoughts and feelings, i get your pain, i really do, but more importantly talk to someone you feel safe with , w/o judgement.
Nas47
Road-Weary Traveler
Fuck..must check what is that invega sustena.Never heard of.May be not exist here.Sounds like horror-quitting that stuff,but man it will pass-that agony.Hold on
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I have no real hope of recovering 100% from my injections, I have lost all my abilities, I would very much like to die
I have no real hope of recovering 100% from my injections, I have lost all my abilities, I would very much like to die
Robi
Bluelighter
i really dont know how to express, for fear of pushing anyone in any one direction, im hear to listen , i want whats best for you, but anything i might say could trigger folks that are in deep depression , you are stronger you than you know but i feel you are fragile at this juncture, so all i can offer is understanding and compassion, your wish for death is very valid to me and my heart truly aches, are you alone in your home? If i may? if not i understand confidentiality, respect privacy, guess my concern is, do you have a friend, to perhaps sit with you and talk? I never would /could talk to anyone, i`d fear reprisal, plain` ol shame and insecurities, where i shouldnt have
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I am with my family but my pain is excruciating, I have the impression that nothing can hold me back except the complications of suicide. I want cyanide
Robi
Bluelighter
no you dont, its painful
You definitely have very real hope of recovering from Invega. I know it seems hopeless right now but many people have recovered from Invega. Please stick around Bluelight for support, especially in the Invega thread, so that you can see that there is hope for you
I'm on the edge but I'm so afraid of not giving 100% like some people. And I'm sufferingYou definitely have very real hope of recovering from Invega. I know it seems hopeless right now but many people have recovered from Invega. Please stick around Bluelight for support, especially in the Invega thread, so that you can see that there is hope for you
Nas47
Road-Weary Traveler
Recovering on 50-60 percent is still better,than give up your life,but who am I to tell you something.Have hope friend,cause man will never know.It_s possible to recover.I wish that for you!
xaddictx
Bluelighter
- Joined
- Sep 10, 2019
- Messages
- 1,004
It worries me when they dont answer back. I'm hoping the OP is ok
Robi
Bluelighter
same
thank you
FallenOne86
Bluelighter
- Joined
- Feb 16, 2020
- Messages
- 303
With everything going on with the Ukraine-Russia mess are we doomed? Should I even bother with life or should I just end my life right now before I have to go through starvation and god knows what else.. forever lock downs and everything going to shit I'm so sick and tired of stressing out over this fucking shit! I hate having this weak mentality and I don't know why I can't overcome this right now wtf
I do my best. It's one of the worst poison in the world Thank you
Jerry Atrick
Bluelight Crew
I'm sure you have already found the Invega thread in Mental Health subforum. It seems like it may take some people a year or even two years to recover from the injections. Even a year or two of misery is IMHO better than permanent nothing.
I have attempted suicide and actually came pretty close to completing. At first I was mad that I survived. Then I gradually began appreciating what life has to offer. In hindsight, I am glad I was not successful in ending it at that moment. I would have never seen my nieces or nephew being born or see them grow up and perform in their band recitals. I would have never written, self produced, and recorded 7 full length albums of original songs.
If all that is between you and psychological equilibrium is some time, I think it is definitely worth the wait.
Nas47
Road-Weary Traveler
Try to not thing a lot about the future.Life is uncertain and no need to put more weight on it.Live day by day like gypsies and don't worry.Be grateful-you see how one country just for a month became living hell
I just had a newborn son, so I have to have faith that there is hope for the future, for him
But you also have to remember that there have been countless other times in history when things were really horrible and seemed dire, wars, poverty, pandemics, terrorism, natural disasters, famines, etc. But life always goes on. What's happening in Ukraine is horrific but it will pass, and you will be okay.
Nas47
Road-Weary Traveler
Be blessed you,your child,your loved ones.That's a wonderful new.I remember,when you was in late pregnancy.Really glad about you