but also this man was playing this stuff nice in day at high-volume deliberately to wind us up while he chaunted threats of death to myself and my mum from his back garden for years on end such was the psychopathic nature of this thieving lying crackhead Rastafarian man with a real reputation for violence.
So there was some major traumatic conditioning associated ...
> Haaaa what a splendid condemnation of all religious vampirisms more or less.
Sorry to chop off words and such..
Chop freely! Real sorry again about that misunderstanding.
Recently another member, who I don't know, doesn't know me, clearly an insensitive mega testosterone guy, took a swipe at me one day just trying to knock me down basically.
I never responded and actually "ignored" him earlier, the only time ever in my forum history.
I just decided I don't need that shit coming at me out of blue when I'm so emotionally sensitive currently.
So on another very large Lysergamide dose plus lots of additional psychoactives, I miskewed your entirely sincere, well meant comment.
For a similar knock as I refer to.
It was not. But that's why I expressed those words, as a general point.
Lots of typos and silly keyboard in-corrects above there, I'm bad for it, optic nerve injury affecting re-focussing and a permanently hallucinogenic field of view plays a part lol.
I've been seeing beautiful though, eyeballs looking at me on every letter of the keyboard since Sunday morning too.
This is new! I've never had an Acid trip like that before. The eyes everywhere.
Each one is different nowadays. All deep as deep.
The eyes are gradually less though. It was disturbing me.
That neighbour though who blasted Lee Perry round the clock- one typo- it was He and his evil wife who were so humiliated and ashamed by simply being exposed, without a word of malice, anger, reproach, threat from us.
We just told them plainly and civilly "We know".
Because it was the right thing to do so they could just drop the soap opera act.
And they immediately did and turned it into a war campaign against us of violent physical and verbal abuse or many many years as always growing up and then later when I became severely unwell with lyme disease in 2005.
So I came to associates many things with that permanent fight or flight on edge looking out for my mum to protect her which I had to do on many occasions from violence and intrusions into our property like gas through the letterbox everything we own damaged constant verbal abuse and threatening to kill us every single day spitting in my mum's face putting dog shit on the car trying to hurt our dogs just for starters.
And I honestly never got into Lee Perry as well.
So I literally repressed it from my memories and every time I would think about it or hear it over the years I was just switch off or block it out.
Which is a shame but I will give it another go now with a fresher outlook because on completely healed from all of that now in time I did a remarkable job and so did my mum we moved house a long time ago and it's literally all in the past and was valuable experience for growth.
Trying to calm myself down today after getting into really some quite severe deep depression at the moment but flu is not helping obviously so I need to keep focus of that and not my head too much.
Thanks for that too, hope you are good.
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