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I Just Need To Post Vs. Lend me your eyes and ears, your wisdom and beauty.

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Man, I don't know... I'm a divorcee who still enjoys the memories of the awesome years, before we changed as people and became incompatible. I don't think you ever get over your ex's. You just come to terms with the situation, and be reasonable about things.
 
I am getting divorced, she left me over a year ago but moved out in February. I was mad for a little bit but now I am at peace. I remember fondly and a sometimes sadly the many great years we had, and how in love we were. And I'm glad I have experienced that, and it's important to me, and I love her, but I'm not in love with her anymore. We were together for 12 years, 18 to 30. It's not a toxic situation in my life though, even though it's heartbreaking, despite me being ready to move on.

You have to accept that what you have no longer works for you, even though it's still real and even though you never thought this would happen.
 
^don't worry doll you'll be fine. You are better off without him
 
It sure does. But pain is a necessary part of the process. Spend time with family and friends, do things you enjoy, work through the pain.
 
aq. said:
Thanks maya <3 man, it hurts.
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It still hurts sometimes, but I tell you what. Even though I really truly was wronged, and in turn so was she -- despite it all, I still love her in a weird way, a way that makes me treat her like I did when we were in love (to this day). Within the relationship that we exist as divorced parents with equal custody over the kids, we are bound for life -- as family. But basically it's just like Xorkoth described "a necessary part of the process. Spend time with family and friends, do things you enjoy, work through the pain."
 
Xorkoth said:
It sure does. But pain is a necessary part of the process. Spend time with family and friends, do things you enjoy, work through the pain.
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Just A Guy said:
It still hurts sometimes, but I tell you what. Even though I really truly was wronged, and in turn so was she -- despite it all, I still love her in a weird way, a way that makes me treat her like I did when we were in love (to this day). Within the relationship that we exist as divorced parents with equal custody over the kids, we are bound for life -- as family. But basically it's just like Xorkoth described "a necessary part of the process. Spend time with family and friends, do things you enjoy, work through the pain."
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If something is truly meant to be, will it?

Should I try to contact him in lackland?

He's the one who cut communication
with me after we fixed everything and made no attempt since then to talk to me. It's been a week. I don't know what to do you guys :( I feel horrible for being in love with him and having a boyfriend that isn't him.
 
Didn't you say he was really controlling and abusive or something? From what I have read it sounds like you are better off (forgive me if I am thinking of something or someone else). I do not think you should try to contact him, even if for no other reason than he has obviously tried to cut you out, and for you to pursue is (a) giving him all the power and (b) something that you are going to regret I believe.

It's going to hurt but you need to let him go. <3

And yes, if something is truly meant to be, it will. Right now you have to face reality, and go on, and what is meant to happen will happen.
 
^Doll just think of the stress, the worries and the pain you have had with him, do you really want to be with a guy lke that? If you stayed with him, nothing willll change, the cycle will continue, he will hurt you again and you're gonna have to worry again, be stressed and worry if he's doing something behind your back. Just let it go hun, in time you will learn to forget him and your feelings will change.
 
That's very true. He wants me to chase him. And for a few days I did. I miss him. So fucking much. It's like he's doing this to spite me. Just feels like someone took a knife and stabbed me. We have so much history.

I guess I just don't want to regret this if he really is "the one". I sound pathetic. :(
 
If I can release 12 years of history with my wife, you can too. <3 It's because I realize it's going to lead to a happier life, and I can report that it already has led to a much happier life for me, and it's been only 4 months since she moved out.

Stick with it, things will get MUCH better soon. <3
 
No he's not hun, look at what he's done, he didn't care about how you feel and he still keeps hurting you and making you feel like shit. You don't deserve a guy a like, you deserve someone who will love you and care for you, we all do. Don't worry you will forget him, he's just gonna be some ex and a bad dream.
 
Maya said:
No he's not hun, look at what he's done, he didn't care about how you feel and he still keeps hurting you and making you feel like shit. You don't deserve a guy a like, you deserve someone who will love you and care for you, we all do. Don't worry you will forget him, he's just gonna be some ex and a bad dream.
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I agree with Maya. You deserve so much better n you deserve to be happy. You'll get that. It took me two years to get over my ex n I thought I would but I did n you will too. If he's "the one" then things will work
Out that way but by what you've said in the past I don't think he is n that you deserve a lot better.

Evey
 
So glad to have a God of my understand that is loving and caring for me today. Phew, what a relief. The battle is over for me. Well I have a long way to go, but it is so nice to be waking up and not feeling like total crap, not having to manage using. I am free just for today.

aq. Keep doing what you are doing. From our discussions I know you are a tremendously powerful person and a survival. I am proud of you!

 
phactor said:
So glad to have a God of my understand that is loving and caring for me today. Phew, what a relief. The battle is over for me. Well I have a long way to go, but it is so nice to be waking up and not feeling like total crap, not having to manage using. I am free just for today.

aq. Keep doing what you are doing. From our discussions I know you are a tremendously powerful person and a survival. I am proud of you!
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That's ace, Phactor. Really pleased for you.
 
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