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Bluelight Crew
Hey,
I realize there's a similar thread around but I've got a slightly different situation so I thought I'd create my own rather than hi-jacking the other.
So I had an accident about 3 years ago where I almost broke my neck and my cervicals got permanently put out of place. Needless to say it's quite painful all the time. I was put on a very low dose of tetrazepam (Myolastan) at first (half a pill a day, so 25mg). I used this prescription as I was supposed to at first but eventually started abusing it quite badly and went up to about 1g a day. My neck eventually got worse and I was put on oxycodone, but there again I had trouble sticking to the allowed dose, so I decided to just quit both when it came to pain management, and just suck it up and deal with the pain without anything.
This had been going okay until the past couple of weeks. I don't know what happened, but it's literally become excruciating. At best it just really hurts, at worst I feel like my whole body's being impaled and I literally cannot move. Yesterday I ended up just spending two hours in bed sobbing because of it. Very thankfully, a friend of mine was able to help me out and give me a bit of morphine and diazepam to get me through the night while I waited to see a doctor today. I've got access to heroin which would have worked but I figure it's really best if I'm careful to differentiate between the drugs I use because I want to, and those I use because I need to.
So anyway, went to the doctor's at lunchtime and I'm being prescribed temazepam and hydrocodone. I want to stress that I did not go there hoping to score drugs purely for recreational purposes. I was sincerely in horrible pain these past few days and just couldn't take it anymore.
The problem is that I don't know if I cn trust myself to be careful with these prescriptions. Hydrocodone I think should be okay as it doesn't do much for me anyway, and in any case I use heroin so I don't really see the point of abusing hydro too. I'm much more worried about the temazepam as I have quite a bad history with benzos, but as I think it's pretty much like tetrazepam when it comes to its muscle relaxant properties, I know it could help me immensely with my neck pain...and I really need that.
I considered giving the pills to someone else for them to hold on to them for me, but I don't want to have to do that, because that would mean explaining why I can't keep them myself --> having to explain I'm a drug addict. And I've just got no one in my life I can say that to, seriously. I just can't.
Does anyone have any ideas as to how I could keep myself from abusing these prescriptions? I figure it's good to keep the line between the temazepam/hydro and the heroin, as in the heroin will continue to be my 'get-high drug' (no judgments on that please...I know it's bad) and the others will be my purely medical drugs, but I don't know if I'll manage to keep it like that.
Any suggestions would be very much appreciated. Sorry for the long post btw.
I realize there's a similar thread around but I've got a slightly different situation so I thought I'd create my own rather than hi-jacking the other.
So I had an accident about 3 years ago where I almost broke my neck and my cervicals got permanently put out of place. Needless to say it's quite painful all the time. I was put on a very low dose of tetrazepam (Myolastan) at first (half a pill a day, so 25mg). I used this prescription as I was supposed to at first but eventually started abusing it quite badly and went up to about 1g a day. My neck eventually got worse and I was put on oxycodone, but there again I had trouble sticking to the allowed dose, so I decided to just quit both when it came to pain management, and just suck it up and deal with the pain without anything.
This had been going okay until the past couple of weeks. I don't know what happened, but it's literally become excruciating. At best it just really hurts, at worst I feel like my whole body's being impaled and I literally cannot move. Yesterday I ended up just spending two hours in bed sobbing because of it. Very thankfully, a friend of mine was able to help me out and give me a bit of morphine and diazepam to get me through the night while I waited to see a doctor today. I've got access to heroin which would have worked but I figure it's really best if I'm careful to differentiate between the drugs I use because I want to, and those I use because I need to.
So anyway, went to the doctor's at lunchtime and I'm being prescribed temazepam and hydrocodone. I want to stress that I did not go there hoping to score drugs purely for recreational purposes. I was sincerely in horrible pain these past few days and just couldn't take it anymore.
The problem is that I don't know if I cn trust myself to be careful with these prescriptions. Hydrocodone I think should be okay as it doesn't do much for me anyway, and in any case I use heroin so I don't really see the point of abusing hydro too. I'm much more worried about the temazepam as I have quite a bad history with benzos, but as I think it's pretty much like tetrazepam when it comes to its muscle relaxant properties, I know it could help me immensely with my neck pain...and I really need that.
I considered giving the pills to someone else for them to hold on to them for me, but I don't want to have to do that, because that would mean explaining why I can't keep them myself --> having to explain I'm a drug addict. And I've just got no one in my life I can say that to, seriously. I just can't.
Does anyone have any ideas as to how I could keep myself from abusing these prescriptions? I figure it's good to keep the line between the temazepam/hydro and the heroin, as in the heroin will continue to be my 'get-high drug' (no judgments on that please...I know it's bad) and the others will be my purely medical drugs, but I don't know if I'll manage to keep it like that.
Any suggestions would be very much appreciated. Sorry for the long post btw.