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How High Are You? V. I'm in space...

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52.5mg hydrocodone, 1mg clonidine, 50mg doxylamine succinate, 800mg of cimetidine to potentiate.

Took a doves ultra pill about 20 minutes ago and it is starting to kick in. Not sure what it contains but users have reported that taking two pills produces very strong or overwhelming effects. I've heard it contains butylone but that sounds like a somewhat weak drug. Also have read that they contain methylone and elsewhere that they contain a combination of beta ketones so I have no idea what is in them. The few available reports suggest that it is strong and MDMA like.

I think I'll take another half of a pill in 10 minutes and another half 30-45 minutes after that if it doesn't feel like it is going to be strong enough.
There could be different batches with different ingredients.

Will report back on effects when it kicks in good.

Also going to place an order for a gram of 2c-i before I go to bed tonight as I have found a really good price on it and have never had more than a small amount of it at once (I got a batch that was sold as DOC and was afraid to take a big dose, maybe maxed at 12mg insufflated and ran out before I found out about the mistake but did get real DOC sent when the error was realized).
 
I took the second pill 20-30 minutes after the first post. Definitely not overwhelming, but very pleasant. I'd say the empathogenic quality is very similar to a medium dose of MDMA(which is what I used most of the 10 times or so that I rolled) and a similar level of euphoria, maybe a bit less. It took much longer to fully kick in and may not have quite peaked yet. It did not have the strong rush of MDMA or methylone, probably due to the long come up. The body feeling is not quite as good as with MDMA or Methylone and it isn't as stimulating either. I feel very relaxed but also very awake and alive. Lying in bed with closed eyes it feels like I am sinking back into a warm and beautiful darkness enveloped in a peaceful blanket of radiating warmth and love, similar to what I have felt on MDMA and some psychedelic trips. There are barely noticeable OEVs and light patterning with eyes closed but that is of little interest to me.

Music sounds amazing!

Was worth the $20. 3 pills would have probably been a perfect level. I've been trying to find methylone for a while and I think I've finally found someone who will ship to the USA so I'll order a gram of it later as it would be more cost effective and provide just as good of an experience.
 
15mg Oxy
180mg DHC

Feeling great after taking a week long tolerance break (surprisingly the cravings were minimal). Also, I got some ambien and klonopin that I can't wait to take tonight and finally got some good sleep.
 
10mg methadone
30mg amphetamine (two 15mg doses taken over the work day)
.5mg of clonazepam

I'll be adding another 10mg of methadone and 1mg of clonazepam after I get back from class tonight.

I feel decent, but honestly I don't know what it is about amphetamine at this point in my life. I really can't find the pleasure I'd like to get out of it. Even combined with methadone and clonazepam, I don't find the negative aspects of amphetamine taken care of. I don't know how people who are extremely depressed (like I am atm in life) can get hooked on amphetamine. It makes me really dislike the person I am while on it, even though I can do things that I really wish I could while not on them (I'm ADHD). I like that I have the motivation to do my hobbies, am able to get large amounts of work done (school or employment), and can focus on one task for more than 5 seconds. I don't like how I present myself to the world, how I become so serious/lose my sense of humor, how I make more frequent mistakes, and am too confident/become a bit conceited. All these negative aspects are so noticeable to others that it can be very bothersome and create a negative perception towards me. It also drive me nuts as well because I see this going on in real time. Once the peak is over especially for the first hour or two of the come down, I hate the fact that I even took them in the first place, but quite often take more to get my head out of that space.

I have been good with my script this month so far though, taking the scripted amount everyday. I'm not tryinig to chase the potential 1.5 to 2 hour max period of solid euphoria that all recreational amphetamine loves fell in strive for anymore. I'd love that bit of euphoria, but its soo not worth the harder comedown. Only way I could truly enjoy using these damn pills again would be the combination of amphetamine's lord and savior, ketamine. That combo is one of my all time favorites, and actually takes away 95% of the negative aspects of amphetamine. Oh, ketamine how you'd could preform so many miracles in my life, if you were in my presence. I'd totally even give my stash to my parents if they would distribute 10-20 mgs every evening (maybe even every other evening), and 300mg once every 3 weeks (a good evening of ketamine or some low dose combos with amps, or methadone)
 
Have you noticed any difference between blotter tabs and liquid LSD? I've only ever gotten the blotter and was wondering if the liquid is any different in onset, duration, or in any other way.

Ive only tried blotter twice actually, quite a long time ago... but liquid will have a faster come up time, due to the area of absorption. Seems to have more of a novel feeling to it as well... if you take like 3-4 drops at once though you'll come up 15 minutes later, than just keep coming up for like 30 minutes lol. Blotters probably like that too though

overall same stuff, just more fun to work with :)


smoking weed
 
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The effects got stronger after the last post and now have plateaued. This is such a wonderful feeling. I have spent most of the time in silence going deep inside myself and getting lost in thoughts and feelings. Last night I had this bad dream and after waking up spent half an hour afraid to open my door because I thought it really happened. I pretty much went through that again for some reason just a short time ago only feeling sure that I had really done it. This feeling and fear lasted maybe five minutes before I snapped out of it and came back to reality. I was like in a trance. In the dream, something got into my bed, scratched and bit my balls and legs and then went for my face. I thought it was some vicious monster that was going to put my eyes out and I grabbed it and repeatedly slammed it hard into the wall. It came back several times and I felt its claws scratching me as it ran up my body toward my head. I repeated my action, the last time stomping its head over and over then throwing it into the hall. I turned on the light to see how bad I was bleeding but it hadn't actually caused me to bleed. I looked at it and saw that it was my pet raccoon and there was blood pouring out his mouth and nose and he was almost dead. It didn't actually happen and I was happy to realize that after the dream and after this drug induced trance I felt extreme joy and exhilaration after I came out of that trance. I've had similar dreams where I accidentally or intentionally killed people or was diagnosed with a terrible disease and believed it actually happened for a while after waking up. The most extreme case of this was when I woke up and spent most of the day thinking I had brain cancer because I dreamed I was diagnosed with it. I feel so stupid when I realize I have spent more than a couple of minutes believing a dream actually happened.

I had another trance like episode before that. In it, I created the most beautiful music I have ever heard in my mind, but it did not seem at all like it was coming from within my mind. It sounded just like listening to music from an external source, only the sound was so much richer and it sounded so full. Most of it was instrumental and sounded just so amazing. There were lyrics at times and they were not from any songs I have ever heard. The lyrics seemed really emotionally deep and brilliant but they may have actually sucked really bad. I don't know because I completely forgot all the words within 20 seconds of coming out of the trance. I do know that the music sounded incredible because I do remember some short parts of it, perhaps not entirely but enough to know that I really wish someone would make music that sounds like that. I'm not sure if it would even be possible, but I think it might be possible for someone to pull it off. I have had similar experiences in dreams, always when I know that I am dreaming. I don't know if any of them had the same emotional impact that this did.

I also had a couple of periods where I just went so deep in my mind that I had little awareness of anything outside of me. I just felt a total peace and contentment.

I was afraid when I took the pills that it would trigger a severe panic attack. I've been having more panic attacks than usual lately and the most common trigger is feeling fast changes in bodily perception or unusual feelings in the body which lead me to believe I am dying, sometimes lasting hours, even rarely all day. Once I overdosed on DOI and had a 60+ hour panic attack thinking I was dying the whole time, but I've never had anything close to that long other than that. I knew this would make my body feel quite different. Instead of causing a panic attack it has caused an amazing feeling of ease. I would have usually felt at least some moments of anxiety in the amount of time that I have been under the influence of this. Last night I lay in bed awake for several hours with the irrational fear that someone was going to smash through my window and murder me. That and the fear that I am asleep or unconscious and going to wake up in a horrible situation (such as being surrounded by dead bodies) and the fear that I will die if I go to sleep often keep me awake for nights on end and have contributed to severe insomnia for the last two months, 2 or 3 times in this period I have stayed awake without a moment of sleep for 5 days and nights or more. I guess I am just fucked up in the head. I think pentobarbital is supposed to be a really strong sleeping pill. I'm going to buy some so that I can just knock myself out when my crazy thoughts keep me awake.

I might buy some crystal MDMA. I can get a gram at a pretty good price. I am just afraid that it might make my depression get worse. I'm really not that depressed lately but I do usually feel emotionally dead inside, empty, unmotivated and really apathetic. I think I might feel like that until I die. I've felt like this most of my life even back when I was a little kid. Maybe that is a type of depression. MDMA has never made me feel depressed after using it, in fact I usually feel better and more alive afterwards for a week or two. But most people seem to feel a depressed mood for a few days and some even for a few weeks after using. Perhaps they use too much. I usually use 150-200mg during a session (125-150mg initial dose often with a rectal dose of 50mg or a little more later to prolong it). Once or twice I did over that, max 250mg. Usually once 4-6 weeks when available, though I did use it twice in one month when I first tried it. Maybe I'll get like 250mg and see if it causes any bad after effects so that I won't have enough to use repeatedly if it causes negative effects. I read a study back when I did MDMA that showed that neurotoxic effects (I think in rats) were completely eliminated with very large doses of vitamin C. If I remember right, either two or three large doses were administered. The first a short time before the MDMA was given and the last I think after it had worn off. There may have been another dose of vitamin C between those two. I think the dose of MDMA was quite large. I should have looked up that study before I took those pills just in case they contain something with neurotoxic effects similar to MDMA. I really don't want to damage my brain.

I might just stick to methylone as my empathogen of choice if I find credible information that it lacks the neurotoxicity of MDMA (though I might use MDMA once or twice per year). I think I read somewhere that it is not neurotoxic but I am not sure that it was methylone.

I've been typing a while and it still has not began to wear off. I feel so alive, not empty at all, and hopeful. I wish I could feel that way without drugs. Maybe this will have a nice afterglow that lasts at least a few days. I don't want to go back to my dead, empty, almost (sometimes completely) emotionless feeling. I think the worst part of that lack of feeling is the inability to love, feel loved, and feel any connection or bond to anyone. Better stop thinking about that before I bring myself down.

Overall, I would say the two doves ultra pills had significantly less stimulant effects than MDMA (it now seems like it has become sort of sedating but without a sleepy feeling), similar euphoria to maybe 125mg of MDMA (that is, a little less than my usual 150mg dose, it has been a couple of years so these are rough estimates), significantly less entactogenic effects compared to any dose of MDMA I have tried (I think lowest was 125mg) and similar empathogenic effects to 150mg MDMA. Overall MDMA is superior, as is methylone (which I would say is approximately equal but somewhat different). This is still very good especially if you can't get either of the others.

I'm going to stop typing and just experience what these passing moments have to offer. If anything different from what I have described occurs I'll update it when I come down.
 
burned out on meth and dexedrine with no end in sight for I am committed to carry out too many tasks to risk the wonders of sleep.

Feeling not bad tho, not bad.

lol that last line made me laugh

I think its a good thing i live in the sticks or id probly be high all the time if i had easy access, theres not much else to do.
 
It is wearing off and I really wish it would not end.
I wish I had more.

I'm gonna get some methylone and 2c-i and mix them together. I think that would be really good.

Since this is pretty close to an end, I am adding 22.5mg of hydrocodone, 1.5mg alprazolam, 50mg doxylamine succinate, 1mg clonidine, and 300mg pregabalin to keep me in a good place until I go to bed. Before bed I'll have 500mg phenobarbital, 600mg of trazadone, melatonin, and valerian root to put my self to sleep. Not sure if it will work though, last time I decided to knock my self out with medication I used a higher dose of that combo and stayed awake all night.

Just a little while ago a fucking cop stopped his car n the road in front of my house. I thought "Oh god, what does this asshole want?" Fortunately, he (or she or they) quickly went on there way. I really hate it when the pigs get so close. I fucking hate cops. Cop killers are my heroes. I like it when cops die. The only good cop is a dead cop. If I ever find out that I am soon going to die or if I decide someday to kill myself, I think I'm gonna kill as many fucking pigs as I can before I go. If any pig comes after me, he/she will get their brains blown out all over the place. They won't take me alive. I've been wanting to buy a gun for a while. I found a place where I can buy really good guns without a fucking background check. I could probably pass one unless they stop crazy people like me from getting them. I don't want to go through the trouble with that.

There is this one gun that holds 80 bullets in one clip/magazine/what ever it is called and it is pretty cheap. I could pump a bunch of pigs full of lead with that. Nobody is going to control what goes into my body. If any one tries, I'll kill them and then I'll blow my own brains out so they won't be able to put me in prison. I hope I live to see the day when everyone rises up and kills all the pigs, politicians, and government officials that try to control our bodies and minds.

The effects seem to be kind of pulsing up and down. It seems that there is almost no effects left from the pills for a few minutes and then the effects strengthen to the point that I partially regain the positive effects, though not nearly what I felt at the peak. It has been doing that since it kicked in. At the peak I would have periods where it was quite strong then it would go down to a moderate level. It has been coming in waves the whole time.

God damn I wish I was back where I was 2 or 3 hours ago. I hadn't felt so good in so very long. I still feel good but combined with sadness because it is fading away and almost gone.
I've talked about this shit way too much. I'll stop now.
 
20mg Methadone (half this morning and the other half 30 minutes ago)
2.5mg Clonazepam (.5mg mid after noon and 2 mg 30 minutes ago)
30mg amphetamine (half this morning and other half around noon)
600mg Mg2+ Citrate
and 32oz of coffee just finished brewing

Might see if I can snag a stog from a neighbor in a little bit, but right now going to drink some coffee while getting in some relaxing TV time. I Worked this morning/afternoon then had an evening class, so I feel this is well deserved.

Ugh, wish I had money for some weed. I can get opioids, benzos, and amphetamine easy as pie, but i have not had weed in my possession since later September, fucking nuts.
 
tapering off oxy for a while... 30mg today in all, tomorrow gonna go to 15mg and then jump off at 10mg ... i know it's not very much but i went from ~100mg or more mixed with cocaine up the nose to like nothing for almost 2 days, was miserable, got 12x 5/325 roxicets to eat and am going to taper

also been smoking bowls of decent marijuana, took my clonazepam (4mg) ...

i guess from the length of this post i am just pleasantly stoned and not-sick feeling but not opiated ... which is fine with me for now.
 
I hate that even a small tolerance to clonazepam prevents you from really getting on it. 3mg of clonazepam feels exactly the same as like 6 or 7 (I haven't dose more than that because I'm not trying to waste all my clonazepam
 
blew 12mg hydromorphone, and smoked some NY diesel on top of it.

definitely a good night at work. feels great man.
 
I just woke up, crushed up 80mgs oxycodone and chased the powder down with soda, I also took 5mgs of valium. What a lovely way to start off valentines day.

-PLUR
 
I hate that even a small tolerance to clonazepam prevents you from really getting on it. 3mg of clonazepam feels exactly the same as like 6 or 7 (I haven't dose more than that because I'm not trying to waste all my clonazepam

I can totally identify with that. When I was using Xanax primarily, and only occasionally clonazepam, I actually liked the k-pins more, because they were just as strong, but lasted longer. Eventually I got a prescription for clonazepam, and one mg does nothing, whereas 1mg of Xanax will have me feeling great. If I wanted to get high on clonazepam I'd probably have to take 3x as much as I do normally, to feel the same buzz that a much smaller amount of Xanax will give me. It's strange that it works this way, as both of them are basically equally potent, but I think chronic clonazepam use is sort of like any other chronic drug with a long half life (methadone, buprenorphine). It's good for anxiety, but it's not that good for recreational purposes, unless you really limit your use of it.
 
lol thats all ways fun, psychedelics on amphetamine comedowns

than again, Im on 2 hits of acid and I might have my own amphetamine comedown later

smoked lots of dank too, then my dad came down and smoke 2 bowls of some alright weed with me, that was dope lol



nothings better than smoking fat joints on acid

drank some shots, finished off my 3rd gram of dank for the night
 
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