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How Are You in One Word Vs Happiness; Only Real When Shared =D

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I know the feeling, animals definitely pull on my heart strings pretty hard. You're such a sweetie and are probably saving his life. :) <3
 
I have a soft spot for kitties. I'm petting one of mine right now actually. its weird, I have more compassion for cats than I do for most people...
 
I'm the same exact way Sero. Animal lovers are a special "breed" of people, IMO. <3
 
Resentful.

They just announced the date of my 25th high school reunion, and the committee sent me an invitation, and a well-meaning classmate added me to the reunion group on facebook. Thing is, high school was just fucking horrible! I was a joke. Literally. Someone made up a whole comic strip about how awkward I was. And I didnt even graduate. I didn't respond well to rigid structure, and I fell through the cracks. It was one of the most painful periods of my life. NO, I do NOT wish to reminisce about it. I just wish they'd leave me out of it.
 
Scared.

Starting over again. A-fucking-gain. Since age 18 I haven't been able to live anywhere more than a year or so. No fucking stability, no friends, little family. It's been a fucking decade of this shit and I'm so sick of it. Fucking frightening to start from scratch again.

I know I can do it but I'm fucking sick of it. I fuck up everything I come in contact with....it makes starting over that much more scary/pointless/lonely. Maybe there is something on the horizon but I don't even know where to start.
 
^ :(

ATM: Better. Still have about a 6 hour sleep debt to work off, but am otherwise fully de-frazzled. Here's hoping it lasts.
 
^^ Captain.H, you've stripped away your green shell it seems. Exhibitionism, or have we made you overwhelmingly jealous of our sleek and stylish black font? So much so that you just couldn't wait another second? :)

^ Good to see ya, pip! :) <3

voxmystic said:
Resentful.

They just announced the date of my 25th high school reunion, and the committee sent me an invitation, and a well-meaning classmate added me to the reunion group on Facebook. Thing is, high school was just fucking horrible! I was a joke. Literally. Someone made up a whole comic strip about how awkward I was. And I didn't even graduate. I didn't respond well to rigid structure, and I fell through the cracks. It was one of the most painful periods of my life. NO, I do NOT wish to reminisce about it. I just wish they'd leave me out of it.
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Wow, that sounds rough (<3). My ten year is coming up this spring, and I don't know if I am going to go. It would require some traveling, but I do have a few people showing interest in seeing me, in catching up. I had a rough HS too. I never had the honour of my very own comic strip, but the bullying was so bad that I stopped counting the times that I got jumped after school or had my stuff stolen. And I suppose a small (albeit vain) part of me wants to go to show off my improved physique and still-youthful looks, but the strength that I actually want to show off to them is that which cannot directly be seen by our eyes. Just being there shows it off because that strength has kept me alive over these past few years of living with a death wish.

Us TDSers are a strong group of people. Seriously, we have put ourselves through some of the most agonizing experiences and lifestyles out there, often repeatedly. And sure, it takes strength to outlast another after-school beating and get yourself home, and it takes strength to survive as the star of your very own comic. But even that's nothing compared to how strong we are when measured by the wars we fight within our own minds.

Think about it: our struggles with addiction (overcoming it), with the lengths and efforts we've gone through trying to successfully hide from ourselves (and then the even further lengths we've traveled when we decide it's time to actually find ourselves again). The strength that is fighting another day to even life when life feels like it's about to hold us under for good (and to do it over and over, what feels like ad infinitum). I mean look at all of those things! I've been through college, been through grad school, traveled the world with just a suitcase, dead-lifted three times my bodyweight, and a few other "accomplishments." But those felt like absolutely nothing compared to, for example, quitting heroin for the first thirty days. Or not jumping off of a bridge when my ex did the unthinkable things that she did to me. We've got a unique type of strength, my fellow TDSers. Ours comes from so deep within that when harnessing it, we get to know ourselves (and each other) in ways that most people never even have a chance to.

Go to your reunion and keep your chin up with pride. People will notice and respect you for it, and quite possibly there might be some, and I am using the term in a generic fashion, "TDSers" at your reunion who will see the way you carry yourself and just know that you're one of the strong ones. You got this! :)


I am hydrated. Nothing better than waking up after some good sleep, albeit rather dehydrated, and then putting an ice-cold bottle of Gatorade to your lips and sucking it down. And what's more, I hit that sweet spot, that area that's about 1floz shy of brain-freeze territory, where you reach that PERFECT hydration point and everything in the world feels GRRRRRRREAT for those few seconds.
 
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[Backwards]

I seem to be experiencing the opposite of what I did 4 years ago. Then my life fell apart because drugs fell into place... now days my drugs are falling apart because my social life has fallen into place o_0
 
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