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How Are You In One Word v. I got a feelin'

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Spork.. U know my situation and I,also, am w/o insurance.. Seems like less you have kids you can't get help, but there is stuff out there.. Glad you're feeling bettr for now hun, something will work out 4 ya.. :)
 
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SHHMCJOOAPOYS said:
triggered

just finished watching season 1 of the wire. fuck, what a show.
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I've been working my way through the back episodes too these last coupla weeks. Missed it first time round, just got started on season 3. Best TV I've seen in a long while, but yeah, talk about flashbacks! :\

I'm peaceful. Not what you'd call my usual state, it's a good feeling after a rough coupla months. Hope I can make it last a while. :)
 
Sepher said:
I'm peaceful. Not what you'd call my usual state, it's a good feeling after a rough coupla months. Hope I can make it last a while. :)
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That's so good to hear, Sepher. You totally deserve to feel that by the bucketful.<3

MoE--you deserve some of that peacefulness, too. What's going on to bring up the anger--just generalized or is it something specific? Hope it passes and your impulses didn't lead to trouble.

me: disgustedmade the mistake of watching TV news at a friend's house. Bad idea. Do we even have a culture anymore that isn't scripted manipulation?
 
herbavore said:
MoE--you deserve some of that peacefulness, too. What's going on to bring up the anger--just generalized or is it something specific? Hope it passes and your impulses didn't lead to trouble.
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Often, I feel like I've not paid enough for peace. I still have so much life and loss ahead, so I need to stabilize as to mitigate these surmounting tremors. I had a nasty conflict w/ a family member and she addressed me w/ some scathing vulgarity. We're both missing our respective marks maturity-wise. Luckily, when family demolishes my day, family salvages my day - my brother and I watched 4 hours of True Blood and never discussed my dispute. Totally took me out of my rumination.

Thank you for asking. You are one of my favorite bluelighters and indisputably one of the very wisest <3
 
I feel like complete shit :( I think I'm just gonna go to sleep so that I don't have to feel like this anymore.
 
herbavore said:
me: disgustedmade the mistake of watching TV news at a friend's house. Bad idea. Do we even have a culture anymore that isn't scripted manipulation?
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I hate when the news villainizes weather. I swear they will make an incoming thunderstorm seem like it's an enemy army approaching.

Thunderstorms are like...good things, in my opinion...
 
From suicidally depressed this morning,to gobsmacked and crying tears of relief tonight.

My boyfriend has just started a new job,after working for a start up company for 6 months where his boss lied and fucked him over and didn't pay him regularly and still owes him in excess of $40 000.As such we had no choice but to pay bills and living expenses on our credit card.Last night we got court papers in the mail from the credit card company as we had been paying less than the minimum repayment each month,and they were suing us for the full $15 000.We were screwed.

Today my bf was chatting to his (very well off) sister about it,and asking advice about how to sue his former boss for wages owing. Turns out many people have been similarly screwed over,tried to sue and the boss cleverly got out of it. So out of the blue,his sister said "Why don't I give you guys the $15000"? Of course bf said he couldn't accept something like that,but his sister knows we both have anxiety disorders and she has had one herself for many years. She said "This debt will be hanging over your head for the next 10 years at least,and I want to see you get better,and this debt will make your anxiety so much worse. I'm in the position where I can easily afford it,so if $15000 will make it go away,please take it as a gift".

We're still gonna try and sue the boss,but in the meantime have humbly accepted her amazing offer. I can't get over it,and can't stop crying from relief. How does one ever go about thanking someone for this? <3
 
MissNervosa said:
I can't get over it,and can't stop crying from relief. How does one ever go about thanking someone for this? <3
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MissNervosa, I think you've just reaffirmed my faith in human nature. 15 grand is a figure I can hardly even begin to imagine, as a debt hanging over me or as something in my gift.. Might as well be 15 million. Incredible. Good on your sis. :)

herbavore said:
That's so good to hear, Sepher. You totally deserve to feel that by the bucketful.<3
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Thanks Herb. It makes a nice change, but I'm optimisticly confident I'm on a roll with it this time. Feeling really strong and positive. :) <3 back atcha.

n3ophy7e said:
I feel like complete shit :( I think I'm just gonna go to sleep so that I don't have to feel like this anymore.
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You craving bad still N3o? :( <3
 
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Sorry to hear that Spork. I hate it when my close friends argue or fight. I feel powerless and it makes me sad too. :(

ATM: I am just coasting through the day.
 
panic in paradise said:
me?

always bad ~ not ever ~ never better
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:( I'm sorry hun, I know the feeling..

Spork~ u need a good day, I'm sorry ur sad my dear. *hugs* 4 u <3 ..

N3o~ hope u feel better soon deary, ur a beautiful girl..

Word: blue..

The mans mad @ me AGAIN, least 1 had 1 good day this week. such Gr8 way to start my day off, yay!
Going to bed a bed all day kinda day, lucky me.. :'(
 
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Empty. Neither here nor there. Not happy, not sad. The only thing I felt today, was anger.

I got home from work with a 12 pack of red stripes. I realize that red stripes need a bottle opener and are not twistable. I frantically search for a bottle opener and cannot find one. I take a deep breath and say "It's okay.. don't freak out". I freak out. I throw a bottle on the tile, punch the shit out of my laundry room door, and slam other shit around, until I realize that I had a bottle opener on one of my keychains. My anger is suddenly wiped away, and I resume my life like nothing happened..

That is my emotional depth. I feel like I'm going through life as a zombie. I go to work every day, and see my co workers every day, and am left to hypothesize that I am just missing something. It's just so frustrating, I can't even begin to explain it in words.
I. Just. Want. To. Feel. Something......
 
Perhaps patience could be your answer.
The time and effort you waste getting upset interferes with the productivity of your tasks and actions.
Don't ever feel backed into a corner with no other option but to freak out. There's always an answer for everything, just develop enough patience and tranquility to smoothly do anything you want.
We all have the potential within us.
 
Sepher said:
MissNervosa, I think you've just reaffirmed my faith in human nature. 15 grand is a figure I can hardly even begin to imagine, as a debt hanging over me or as something in my gift.. Might as well be 15 million. Incredible. Good on your sis. :)
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It has done for me too! I've been living in fear (I also have panic disorder) of our escalating debt for so long it's taking my mind awhile to adjust that it's going to be okay.I had anxiety dreams as usual last night and woke up choking on the fear of a big anxiety attack this morning.The full weight of the stress of it all is starting to hit me.Both me and my boyfriend have vomited blood in the last few weeks,and it turns out we both have ulcers from stress.My hair has been falling out for about 2 months now,again from stress.I can't remember the last time I felt truly relaxed.I look and feel like shit.

Once it actually resonates with me that everything is resolved,I feel that the money has the potential to turn my life around and make me feel positive and hopeful for the future again.While I can't do anything financially,I always try to help people in need (mental health wise as that is where my experience lies) and also animal rescue wise (something I do every day),and I really hope that one day I can help someone as much as my boyfriend's sister has helped us <3
 
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