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  • TDS Moderators: AlphaMethylPhenyl | paranoid android

how are you in 1 word ?

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fucking awful. Losing my grip with my coping mechanism, everything becomes a joke - I need to stay on point how real this life is.
 
thx bro, im trying, but i always hide serious shit by makin a joke... and while it can help some situations out - when you're talking about 1 - 2 hours tops sleep a day after 3 nights up period, joking about what ou see and all that , its not funny man ,i hate it. i dont know how to just say it like ii feel about this area, i feel like "i hate it" doesn't explain the anguish and fury - ptsd makes me feel like the dumbest mother fucker in the tub fartin and laughing. I'm not that guy, i failed at alot but im not stupid. sorry for rant guys, been real hard day.
 
Legerity said:
^Be nice to yourself.



I didn't know I had such an effect! ;)
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lol

I was not aware of that either, til you just said!?! *BAAuMMMMMM!*;)<3

no, no really you do
Note to self: Have to maintain kissing new Mod's ass

ATM: Tad Apprehensive /*edit-previous bullshit/ actually worried and angrily apprehensive ~kicks self
Made a questionable decision and have to handle consequences tomorrow...ugh! Screw it, deal with it tomorrow.:|
 
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Victorious

Felt my mood start to change to more depressive, panic attack incoming. Avoided that shit. That said I still feel bad and can't get the images out of my head. Gonna have to learn to live with them for now.
 
^^Same here, I hate writing essays. I have two due at the end of the month so it shouldn't be too bad but honestly there's so much else that I just can't focus on any of that now...

Me: Anxious/excited
 
good

maybe sort-of hah - im around ~75-80 hours w/o
freaking klonopin - yesss. this is the longest w/o in near 4 years.
its clear the lithium is not welcome in my body, and this is very frustrating! lol

for now and especially later... it seemed


-------------------------------------------------
how in the heck can you hate 2 writing essays?! you guys write - its what you do' a lot of effectively here.
writing anything is maybe the best way to put your more meaningful thoughts and soul out for others. it is art, its more considered 'intellectual-property' maybe in a sense, but its art...
 
That is an awesome way of looking at it pip! Thank you :)
Trust you to make writing essays sound appealing! =D
I hope you're in the clear soon with you k-pin withdrawals <3


Me: annoyed
My lorikeet has been screeching ALL DAY!!! Like, I know he's a noisy bird and he usually goes on maybe like 30-minute rants when he gets excited, which I can tolerate. But not for 5 goddam hours!! :(
 
its clear because they arent there.

i agreed to start only to stop, yeaaars ago - i dont have a 'general anxiety d/o' (far from that) i started them specifically for agoraphobia, and exposure is what eventually broke me through, besides patience.
i mean, i went my whole life w/o considering benzos for any reason, and now/then, its was an obnoxious priority... useless, but will always be there if i am snapped back into that, which now would be hard to beat.


my main concern is the lithium... im not messing around with more meds - my list of allergic reactions is a horror - annnd agoraphobia or chain-thinking is not going to kill me - this is set in stone
 
n3ophy7e said:
That is good then!
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ohhh yes it is..!
but, its taken me yearrrs of grinding gears to finally shed that -
ive had to go to the er several times to get my damn refill,
and they do give it up if needed and proven without
hesitation because it is just bad.


benzos should not be used as a long-term source of treatment as they are so often... well in the USA last i looked xanax was the most prescribed drug - that just seems way wrong, but i guess what doesnt with that.
 
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