Hi Everyone, IOP the last couple of days has been pretty intense. Monday's topic was the frustration-->anger-->depression-->substance abuse cycle and yesterday was continued work on CBT. I told the group that two "scripts" (that's what therapist calls them that my parents left me with were:
1. From father: If someone is trying to fuck with you, they're probably fucking with you.
2. From mother: If someone is fucking with you whether or not you get your ass beat, or give the ass beating, it's better to take the consequences and not lose face (she is Japanese, which is why this concept of "face-saving" is important.
The therapist quipped, "Your parents left you with some interesting scripts." To say the least. It has left me a person that instinctively assumes the worst about people. We started to work on new scripts that could be substituted for these two unhealthy ones and I have an one-on-one appointment with him today and I'm sure we'll talk more at length about that.
I have things now to look forward to as well which will help curtail the drinking and cravings. Going to trivia nite with my sponsor tonight, then going to see The Florida Project at our local art theater tomorrow night. It's definitely Oscar material. It's about impoverished families that live in cheap motels along Kissimmee's tourist strip. Also planning on seeing the midnight showing of The Exorcist also at the art theater Saturday night, then my ex is taking me to Animal Kingdom on Sunday to eat at my favorite Disney restaurant that serves West African food since her coupon expires that day.
Hope everyone has a good day. It's nice to feel like positive forces are back at work in my life.