leet
Bluelighter
Welcome to H.M.P. BLUELIGHT TOWERS!
This is a:
Criminal Anthropology Simulation Master Class
Open To All Forum Members
Episode difficulty level:2
TOP DOG
Episode #1 - Dog eat dog
Episode #1 - Dog eat dog
You may struggle without the correct training and background in Criminal Anthropology. Google it now before the simulation starts as once you are banged up inside H.M.P.BLUELIGHT TOWERS you will no longer have legal access to the internet
This simulation will run for a few weeks or so and is SCIENCE. Your participation will add to the human experience. Your data will be assimilated and will be used to prove the science behind CRIMINAL ANTHROPOLOGY. Don't worry! It is possible to join in a few weeks into the simulation and still WIN!
The prize is magnificent, more details will follow...
The people named and their crimes as detailed in this thread are real. They have all been found guilty in court. On occasions jurors have deliberated over the evidence. In each case, a judge has decided their crimes are so serious that only a custodial sentence will suffice.
Contains offensive and despicable content that is too controversial and too FUCKING AWESOME for children. Real people will be exploited and abused for your entertainment, and for pseudo-educational peer-reviewed purposes only, goddamit we are actually doing REAL SCIENCE here.
WE DO WHAT WE CAN, BECAUSE WE MUST
The stark, ugly, profound truths TOP DOG exposes may be soul crushing to the weak of mind. If you allow a child to read this thread you are a bad parent or guardian. Read only in well ventilated areas. Should redness or swelling occur stop reading at once. Use safety goggles. Wear latex gloves.
Contains strong action violence and sexualised posing.
Ready?
Well let's play:
TOP DOG
Have you got what it takes to rise like the scum you are to the top of the rancid pool that is H.M.P. BLUELIGHT TOWERS?
Each episode will give you choices to make, relying not only on your Criminal Anthropology skill sets you will also have to lie, bribe, cheat, intimidate, claw, gouge, shag and strangle your way to the top of the prison shit heap.
Earn the RESPECT that is your due from the prison population.
CAN YOU BECOME:
TOP DOG
"Prisoner 13, you have pleaded guilty to the charges brought by this court and it is now my duty to pass sentence. You are an habitual criminal who accepts arrest as an occupational hazard and presumably accepts imprisonment in the same casual manner. We therefore feel constrained to commit you to the maximum term allowed for these offences, you will go to prison for ten years."
You've just arrived in H.M.P. BLUELIGHT TOWERS, and because you went down for armed robbery, you are considered to be one of the aristocracy of the prison population, but that isn't good enough for you.
You know you're just another fucking n00b. Yeah OK you've been getting stuck in and helping out spotting weights and a bit of boxing in the gym, but that isn't enough...
You decide to establish yourself as the meanest mother fucker in the mother fucking place.
To start your rule of terror and make your name in this shit-hole you've used your blagging skills, some fast talking and an oz of burn to steal a knife from the kitchen.
You have managed to blag your way onto the muppet wing. You're going to slice up a LIST99
You FIND YOURSELF in a recreation room with a TV blaring, a table tennis table and a grand selection of muppets sitting around, eating cheesy wotsits, watching TV or playing table tennis poorly. To a man they turn and notice you and your carving knife.
You need to shank up a real monster, the king of the beasts, show the whole nick just how hardcore you are and earn those all important RESPECT points and then make a clean getaway before the screws turn up.
But because you're so new you don't know who the fuck is who.
There is no right or wrong answer, you need to draw on the knowledge life has given you and all you know about Criminal Anthropology. Each decision you make will earn you RESPECT points. These points added together will determine the winner of each episode. At the series end the highest scoring convict becomes...
TOP DOG
Not everyone on the Vulnerable Persons Unit is a beast, it will also have snowflakes, wallies and other "at risk" types. But, come on anyone choosing to be apart from the rest of the prison population is fucking STRANGE.
Birds of a feather and all that.
Using only your Criminal Anthropology skills to guide you can you pick out the lowest of the low, the real depraved monster from the following beasts and hobbits?
Aaaaaand then go and shank that pedo motherfucker right up!
Ready? Let's play:
TOP DOG
THE ALARM BELLS ARE RINGING
GET TO WORK
CHRIS
NICK
PAULY
STU
JR
LEE
NICK
PAULY
STU
JR
LEE
Remember: For these guys this is fucking serious...
Hey, but for you it's just for fun!
NOW SHANK THAT BEAST!
No animals were hurt in the making of this thread.
I will publish the results next week or so. Keep your eyes PEELED for Episode 2 of this exciting prison simulation!
CHECK IN HERE REGULARLY FAM TO SEE WHO IS THE RESPECTED
TOP DOG
EPISODE #1
AND FIND OUT WHO IS THE DISRESPECTED PRISON POODLE!
GIVING YOUR DREAMS WINGS
&
PUTTING JACKBOOTS ON YOUR NIGHTMARES
TOP DOG
EPISODE #1
AND FIND OUT WHO IS THE DISRESPECTED PRISON POODLE!
GIVING YOUR DREAMS WINGS
&
PUTTING JACKBOOTS ON YOUR NIGHTMARES
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