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Great quotes while out - part III "If u cant say anything nice, make sure its funny!"

At an event a while ago my buddy was methed out of his goard, starts up a conversation with some dude...
Mate: Hey man, what's ur name?
Dude: Hey, my name's...
Mate: Shut up, I'm Didge! Where ya from?
Dude(confused): Oh I'm from...
Mate: Yeh see ya!
It was pretty damn funny to watch. :)
Also 2 great quotes in my sig for those who can relate to it ;)
 
(sitting in room, on acid)
me: "Ya know, if you need lots of coloured lights at an event, you haven't taken enough drugs"
also on the same day...
Me: "How funny would it be if you and me walked up to someones house and knocked on their door and said 'I'll have a cup of water, and one for me mate'"
Schizo and me both break down in tears laughing
Well, it was funny at the time...
[ 10 June 2002: Message edited by: nickthecheese ]
 
funniest thing I heard all twisted weekend:
Trancechyk: Im going to get zippers put in the pocket of my phatties so guys can get their hands in my pants easier
 
TC: your welcome, unfortunately at the time my mouth was working faster than my inuendo gland ;-P Now that i think back tho, its quite funny.
GOT MUSK???? ;P
 
AHHHH A few funnies were dropped at my place after BLISS 3 On the long weekend.
Swifty making tea " who wanted white with one? Who's white with one? White with one? White man with one? White man with one testicle! hahaha. Tom's a white man with one testicle"
Proceeds to walk away giggling and keeps making tea
Swifty sitting on the chair munted sits up and says "How the hell can I go to court looking like this"
Cue laughter from everyone.
Nocturnal Chick talking to me on the bed " Babe, we need to talk about this. You see I admit cats and this is a serious forum which needs to be discussed"
Cue blank stare from me.
Just as Sybarite and Myself have discussed why everything swifty says is making a tear in the space time contiuum and will be the end of us all with his mind bending babble he says to us
"Yeah, i could get away with anything, even if I was wearing a plastic ass on my face"
 
This was before I got together with my girl friend.
"If you were a flavour what would you be?"
"Cherry."
"Real or fake?"
"Real, like my tits."
"Thats good because I hate fake. Real is so much better."
[ 15 June 2002: Message edited by: Sllip ]
 
Me at Cass on the weekend tripping balls. Talking to Dante outside the club when I suddenly burst out laughing for no (non-drug-related) reason. Dante gives me a puzzled look.
Me: Sorry dude, not laughing at you, just the way your glasses were running down your face.
Dante: Shit, I had better see OPSM about that.
--
MDMA-4-ALL (And a little less acid for me next time)
 
one nite while trashed on the bikkies :)
Me: your cute are u single (blurted out)
him: yep why u trying to pick me up?
me: Im not that forward!!!!!!!!!!!!
and i just asked if he was single. oh well at least i found out where i stood!! while looking desperate at the same time!
 
"have u ever realised that they have been changing the detergent to clean the machines they make wheatbix's in, hence why sometimes they taste diferent"
my couzin said that one the other day
hahahah
thats cereal wheatbix btw
 
I have come across this so called change in weetbix flavour, and i do believe your buddy could be right!
I just thought my favourite breakfast cereal had gone stale :( . Now i have a conspiracy theory to comfort me, so i can keep chugging them down :)
 
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