Great quotes while out - part III "If u cant say anything nice, make sure its funny!"

[RobertRollie]

Apollo: I just did 'plug the nang'

 

[randomblondeboy]

prometheus: 'i didnt have balls as a child'

 

[-Thoth]

Rabbi: "Congratulations, you have clocked the Universe. Play again Y/N?"
"Yeah, well... Why don't you just go post that to shutthefuckup.com"

 

[pixx-e]

While ADSR is swapping numbers with cute random raver....
Random Raver: "Do you know what an MR2 is?"
ADSR: "What? Is it a pill?"
*Strange look from Random Raver*..."Nah, it's a car"

 

[shorza]

My girlfriend noticed me blurting out this sentence while I was faaaaasst asleep:
"Hmmmmmmmmm... Profriterolls....."

 

[MDMA-4-ALL]

S: J's fucked up
J: I'm not fucked up... I was kinda fucked up, but then I took another pill.
--
MDMA-4-ALL (And pillers logic for you)

 

[hoptis]

/me lites a ciggy for a tall, dark-skinned woman standing at the bar. A tranny called 'Sugar Brown'.
Sugar Brown: "Thanks... honey, you're peakin' off your tits."
Me: *stares back in amusement* "Yeah... guess so"

 

[josh_nexus]

While wandering around, totaly fucked, with a group of friends last night.
Friend:"dude you eyes are fucked"
josh_nexus:"so are yours"
Friend (with a very serious look on his face):"but they cant be fucked because i cant see my eyes"

 

[apollo]

Originally posted by shorza:
My girlfriend noticed me blurting out this sentence while I was faaaaasst asleep:
"Hmmmmmmmmm... Profriterolls....."
Bahahahah! Funny shit... What were you dreaming about?? Thank you for putting a smile on my face...

 

[Sllip]

A friend of mine sent me this sms the other night.
"good im way too l li ve l l tubul beca ukjw"
She still doesn't know what she was trying to say.

 

[PsychoKitten]

This from the party @ the warehouse on sat nite in Newie:
RandomMuntedWannaBeDealer: You wanna buy some speed? It's hell strong - it's got Glucodin in it.

 

[Genasirus]

In line with Shorza...
I walk in from work last night at 11:45pm, Rach's asleep in bed. I open the bedroom door, softly creep in and get this :
"Hmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmm..... BED!" at which point she rolls over and tries to bury her head under the pillow.
And erm, woke up a few days ago at 5:30am to give Rach a lift to ze station and I open my eyes and declare proudly "I was talking to David Beckham, people were cheering and he had white hair!"
Sleep is ze best drug.