I reject much of it. God is everywhere. No"where". I guess, even in this game. But I wouldn't call it the real world that I want around. I don't mind the fast cars, at all. I wish everyone had light speed.
My parents may have sheltered me, but they didn't really have to try. I was from a small community. They made decent money. We were never, as a family, financially desperate. I never had to deal with verbal abuse, from either of them, and I don't call that sheltering, I call that... more healthy than what I have witnessed. Granted, I was made to go to church from an early age, but also, with respect, my first blowjob or sexual act with a girl to completion in any form occurred in a church parking lot into a girl who married a guy named Roman Duty, and it happened to song 23 of The Fragile, by Nine Inch Nails, while I was in love with her best friend, who was born on the front man of this band's birthday. With respect, my first girl I saw naked was named Christina, as a child, who I exposed myself to and wanted to marry. With respect, the first guy I had my mouth around was named Christopher, and he first put his mouth around me. With respect. And his dad was a cop. Him and the mother caught us (A teacher, I think), and Christina's dad was a lawyer (mother a nurse). With respect, the first pornography I ever saw was Emmanuelle, on Cinnemax. I always slept in church, except when I was in Sunday School and the blond haired girls form Brookeville kept me awake. But when I watched Emmanuelle, I suddenly started hearing "Emmanuelle" in church, in my sleep, jerking (jerkinjerkinjerkin) myself back awake, for a second... "OMG They know I masturbate! What? Zzzz...".
I stopped going to church when I was 17, when I started getting blowjobs and 69s and could drive my car, and work.
I... rejected my family, in a sense... My mother, in a sense.
A milk allergy "ruined" my life through chronic ear infections, and bodily damage directly and indirectly. I rejected so many things. I sheltered myself from this. I have been fearful, but fear keeps us alive. Fear God. Without it, your skull wouldn't have formed. You would have never grown from the ground.
So yes, I fear. But I recognize it. I also Love, a lot... And this is one reason I just can't play this game right now. Multiplayer at least redeems it in that you can form relationships with actual people, form posses, protect one another, act with "Love", and not just "Fear", even if they are not so opposite ends of the spectrum. But they gave me nobody that was easy to Love, in the beginning, in this game-- A "friend" who I would never want around, slinging "nigger nigger nigger" (but you can't say this), guns, cars, money, women, what. Corruption.
You judge how you want.
I find the game disrespectful, to "Life", in what is represented in the beginning.
To judge myself, I am a bottom feeder, and whoa, I do like licking, tonguing, sucking, cleaning certain pretty girls' undercarriages. My my. (My my my). Smack. Grab. But, I was going somewhere else with that. I put through over a tank of gasoline through an engine on some days, to deliver "life sustaining" drugs to old people who are simply dying, mostly. "Thousands of dollars upon thousands of dollars" (millions, billions) of death. I dislike the way the pharmaceutical industry works... But I live off of it. I carry a cell phone that is made with conflict minerals, and I have blood on my hands. Every day, I want to kill myself, and reject it all. I want to go to the desert, and starve, but I'm a bit like Walter White.
I used to be able to hurt, or didn't know what I was doing. I used to be able to laugh. Now it has to be a bit deeper, or real of a laugh. But I am finding it harder to at times. And I really just want to reject things. But here I am, jerkinjerkinjerkin' with a noose around my neck.