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Ghosting

This is crazier every day... then I did write a good message to her, then she replied perfectly, the same day, saying things like "I feel so comfortable talking with you and I don't know why" or things like "I hope we see each other soon" "and you don't find myself too intense"
then I wrote her again, a long email...
reply? 7 days ghosting! this is crazy
she is driving me crazy, I will try to meet her and tell her that I don't understand this stuff!
Some girls are super complicated.
 
I gave up, I sent another email with my cellphone number (she didn' have it) and she did nothing, I will go there to visit her workplace (because I need to go) so I hope I won't see her face to face, it would be awkward af
it's honestly exhausting, to open your heart to someone who it's not available and treats you like a commodity, horrible stuff.
I swear that I was crying like a baby in the shower, when I finally "accepted" that she was not going to make any move... I don't understand why I struggle so much with this, NEVER happent to me this way and I barely knew her, perhaps it's because it's the first woman I trust in 7 years (since my ex I didn't have any relationship neither I tried because I felt like an emotional zombie for a year).
I feel this very difficult, I don't deserve this.
 
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