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Getting things in line for the end.

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I'll be happy to route your donations c/o bluelight. [mention]Alisdairm[/mention]'s in the US if you want to save on shipping. He won't mind signing for it at the office.
 
Scrofula said:
I'll be happy to route your donations c/o bluelight. Alisdair's in the US if you want to save on shipping. He won't mind signing for it at the office.
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What the... k what now? Who? Have him contact me. This "Ali" being. I'll send it to him/her.
 
Yeah, I mentioned you need to step out of this thread at least once before it's closed.
 
It won't get erased. TRY AGAIN. WRONG.

What if you're stuck in here? You never left the thread, it gets closed, but not erased. Trapped forever.


Read.
 
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Scrofula said:
What if you're stuck in here? You never left the thread, it gets closed, but not erased. Trapped forever..
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th
 
Figured it out. And that photo? That photo is fucking terrible. Sick.

But I figured it out. I am timing the train the runs by my house. That's my only option. It needs to happen. And yes my pure sweet daughter knows. She knows.
 
I cannot give her a body to bury. Like I wished. But I want that photo removed or this all removed before my angel child sees any more than she has. Got it?

All of you need to erase this.
 
Hey, AlmostEverything I am so so sorry I didn't hold on.

Scro you're a stubborn asshole whom I wanted to send my shit to.

(Every single person who has responded after I relapsed...)
This is what happens. "Liquor" means spirit. It is evil. STAY AWAY.

I wish I could see well enough to read every response because they are so, so important. I just can't... I'm so, truly heartbroken about it.

I figured it out, guys. Please pray for my release and the life my daughter lives without me. Thank you.

This whole thread I want deleted, I guess it is too late now. I pray no young souls read it. I'm sorry Heavenly Father, I'm so, so sorry. See you soon.
 
Scrofula has helped you a lot from what I can recall reading the first one third of this thread. You should be grateful he stepped in. For real. He has had the patience and care about you and when you want to help others you are also honest about who you are so don't expect others to be perfect because we are not.

I really wish that you have a good recovery but also that you recognize that you have made it a bit difficult for some of us to help you while you were drunk and posting stuff about your mom, dad, jumping out of his auto. People in here get worried and remain at your side, but sometimes you make that task a bit difficult to follow.

You need help TheOpposite, I am mean it. I don't say this to annoy you or to make your day worse but because you need to address you problems physically to a professional or go to a hospital if you were feeling so down to the point you were about to take your life away.

Don't offend people who wanted to help you in general. Haven't you noticed how much people cared about your problems? Now that you have our attention don't take it for granted and do something about it.

I truly with you get better!

All the best,
Erik
 
TheOpposite said:
Hey, AlmostEverything I am so so sorry I didn't hold on.

Scro you're a stubborn asshole whom I wanted to send my shit to.

(Every single person who has responded after I relapsed...)
This is what happens. "Liquor" means spirit. It is evil. STAY AWAY.

I wish I could see well enough to read every response because they are so, so important. I just can't... I'm so, truly heartbroken about it.

I figured it out, guys. Please pray for my release and the life my daughter lives without me. Thank you.

This whole thread I want deleted, I guess it is too late now. I pray no young souls read it. I'm sorry Heavenly Father, I'm so, so sorry. See you soon.
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Aight, so you are an enigma to me. I can't look away. I pick my phone up and just have to check this damn thread.

You DO appear very intelligent in some of your post. In others you seem to have zero attention span and you are just spewing nonsense. So spill the beans.... bipolar? It's not just the alcohol, there is something else.

There is an argument here that you are not in that much physical pain. Is that right? No REAL chronic pain? Let's face it, sprinting out of your "apartment" to save someone else's dog is not something someone who is in a lot of pain does. Also, there is no chronic pain patient that I know of that would jump out of a moving car and cause even more pain.

Also, I'm no expert, people that really are in pain(mental or physical) and want to end don't typically do it in ways that would cause more pain.

So what's up? You're bored? Wanna fuck with the good people of BL?

If you really do need help why not put what the ACTUAL issue is on here and let people do what they do best in TDS. There are some extremely sharp minds in here if you will just be honest with them.
 
gmlifer said:
Aight, so you are an enigma to me. I can't look away. I pick my phone up and just have to check this damn thread.

You DO appear very intelligent in some of your post. In others you seem to have zero attention span and you are just spewing nonsense. So spill the beans.... bipolar? It's not just the alcohol, there is something else.

There is an argument here that you are not in that much physical pain. Is that right? No REAL chronic pain? Let's face it, sprinting out of your "apartment" to save someone else's dog is not something someone who is in a lot of pain does. Also, there is no chronic pain patient that I know of that would jump out of a moving car and cause even more pain.

Also, I'm no expert, people that really are in pain(mental or physical) and want to end don't typically do it in ways that would cause more pain.

So what's up? You're bored? Wanna fuck with the good people of BL?

If you really do need help why not put what the ACTUAL issue is on here and let people do what they do best in TDS. There are some extremely sharp minds in here if you will just be honest with them.
Click to expand...

They won't diagnose me with anything! I truly want to know myself.

All they have diagnosed me with is "depression".
My biological mother DOES have a diagnoses of schizophrenia, though, and ended up in Blackfoot for a few years.

Bored? YES.
Lonely? YES.
Drunk? YESSSSSSSS!!! Relapsed and haven't turned back.

I truly don't want to be an enigma for anyone, my own daughter has been on this thread. Why it is still going, why I keep checking? Beyond me.

I'm just no longer working now and have been on a serious binder spewing shit off.

My begging to have it removed was just. This is very, very dangerous.

Back to the matter of how images get stolen... it happens, guys. So be careful.
 
I am truly not wanting to "fuck with the good people of BL".

This bluelight site is the most intelligent thing I've come across, in awhile.

Something is going to change today. Because my father knows, my daughter knows, and I've literally been trying to die for DAYS. It WON'T HAPPEN. It's... way more powerful than I can fathom.
 
I know the trains schedule now though. And that could be an option, still. I just truly want my baby to have a (somewhat pretty) body to bury. Because she wants that.

I am pretty sure this is ALL out of my hands now. We'll see, I guess. They just do not committ me in the hospital, I SCARE THEM. Because I know their job better than themselves.
 
The fact they don't committ me is weird.

I truly think I'm going to have to lie and say I see shit that isn't there, like Shauna.
Otherwise they just won't committ longer than three or four days and keep me high as a kite.

That's alllllllll that happens. This is not my first, second, third RODEO folks.

(True idahoan talk right thurrrrrrr furrrrrrr ya)
Hahaha. Sorry, I had to.
 
My daughter is keeping me alive with her own will power, I swear...

That has to seriously be it. Because I've TRIED FOR DAYS, and here I am.

She's more powerful than me... and anyone I know... I'm so thankful I changed my password... she'll probably figure it out though. Clever lil shit...
 
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