General Heroin Discussion #18 - v. Stupidity ain't no badge of honor

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^^

Hah yeah not the best pick up line. "Hey there baby. Guess what I'm into? Jabbing needles into my flesh. Wanna go out sometime?" :\
 
I can't imagine pushing myself over my initial squeamishness, let alone making a habit out of it. I stepped on a piece of glass last night and had to pull it out of my foot, somehow that reminded me of it because I had to coax it out of my foot, I guess like you have to wiggle the needle in?
 
^^

If it's a fresh needle there is no wiggling. It slides in like butter, unless you're going into heavy scar tissue maybe.
 
oldhippytony said:
This fence sitting is for the birds. I gotta go one way or another and I gotta do it soon. I'm either gonna do what I gotta do to grab some bundles and go on a nice run ... or jump off from the <.5 mg daily sub routine, drink up my stash of Argentinian Malbec, and get NA clean.
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How long were you off any opiates/opioids before you got on sub? Tony I'd happily read your blog if you had one, collect all those stories of yours' in one place : D

I recently had the chance a have a free line of blow, and I turned it down because it seems to lead to a relapse for me. It's not even always during or after; it's like it wakes up the dragon inside of me in the days afterwards. I'm assuming this is common?
 
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The thought of digging in my arm with a needle fucks with me so hard I don't do it, and I've been doing dope for years lol. I'd rather spend more to put it up my nose than deal with that
 
^^

I wish I'd had the same issue. Ha. Woulda saved me a lot of heartache and grief over the years. Unfortunately though I took to the needle like a fly to shit.
 
^I know! I even kinda like the idea of it, like a more in-tune with your body drug regiment (in a fucked up way), and the paraphernalia is so professional--but I'm just too scared of needles to get over ever trying it. Fortunately I love the feeling of getting tattooed enough for that to be my needle fix (it's very meditative).
 
TriputoryHeadicine said:
How long were you off any opiates/opioids before you got on sub?
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My opiate history in a nutshell: Began using H in early 80s >>> switched to methadone maintenance mid-eighties >>> back to H >>> got (totally) clean early 90s >>> began using again in 2010 (wisdom tooth extraction, was given Hydros which awakened the monkey, ate the Hydros like candy) >>> used intermittently from 2010 to late 2011 (Hydros, Tramadol) >>> found a connection for H >>> ran with that for about 6 months off and on. I woke up one day in May 2012, sick, and wasn't willing to drive 4 hours one way to score so I drove 20 minutes to a Subox doctor. So to answer your question, I transitioned directly from H to Subs. My habit wasn’t nearly as bad this go-round as it was in the 1980s however. It’s hard to believe I’ve been on the subs for almost 2 years.

So take it from me, your free line of blow, while free at the time, prolly would’ve cost you big time... eventually.
 
oldhippytony said:
My opiate history in a nutshell: Began using H in early 80s >>> switched to methadone maintenance mid-eighties >>> back to H >>> got (totally) clean early 90s >>> began using again in 2010 (wisdom tooth extraction, was given Hydros which awakened the monkey, ate the Hydros like candy) >>> used intermittently from 2010 to late 2011 (Hydros, Tramadol) >>> found a connection for H >>> ran with that for about 6 months off and on. I woke up one day in May 2012, sick, and wasn't willing to drive 4 hours one way to score so I drove 20 minutes to a Subox doctor. So to answer your question, I transitioned directly from H to Subs. My habit wasn’t nearly as bad this go-round as it was in the 1980s however. It’s hard to believe I’ve been on the subs for almost 2 years.

So take it from me, your free line of blow, while free at the time, prolly would’ve cost you big time... eventually.
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Thanks for responding.

Very happy with myself that I turned down the blow. Every "No thanks" feels like a success.

Tomatilli I'm happy for you- you sticking with a maintainence prog? I'm done being "holier then thou", I just couldn't help but chime in.

Hugs to all <3 yes I'm a hugger; Can't stop, won't stop! : D
 
Time to rock the affliction long-sleeved type emo shit /hood,ready my spring/summer cloths. Someday ill enjoy it with 0ut sleves. Around the fam.would like to show em the tattoos,muscles,and fcking track marks. Spring cleNing eh
 
Sorry but I dont get the whole "i cant shoot" thing. Its not brain surgery, its sticking a fucking pin in your arm and pulling back then pushing in. Especially guys, you fuckers got big ass bulgy veins! Whats the hang up? In no way am I advocating needle use, but I definitley think if you cant even figure out how to work a pin, then it doesnt need to be in your hand in the first place. Ive only shot someone up once and ill never do it again. I guess some people pick up on it in a snap, and others are..slow?
 
I can't sleep and they have Trainspotting and Drugstore Cowboy playing back to back. I can't help but watch but it is such a trigger. It's 5am and I'm kicking with Matt Dillon and William S. Burroughs. I just can't get past my addiction to drug porn its almost as addictive as the drugs themselves.
 
Once I learned about creating a vacuum in the syringe as soon as you pierce the skin so that when your in a vein the blood just rushes right in was when I really got the hang of it. I've never had to use a turnicate thankfully.

As far as track marks go, there's only one spot on my lower left forearm (cephallic vein I believe) that has about 2 inches of scar tissue above the vein from using it too much when first learning to IV. It always appears darker and easier to notice when I'm cold or sick.

Thanks to Neosporin and Vitamin E, the crooks of my arms look normal and I've never had a phlebotomist complain about my veins.
 
ohshea said:
Sorry but I dont get the whole "i cant shoot" thing. Its not brain surgery, its sticking a fucking pin in your arm and pulling back then pushing in. Especially guys, you fuckers got big ass bulgy veins! Whats the hang up? In no way am I advocating needle use, but I definitley think if you cant even figure out how to work a pin, then it doesnt need to be in your hand in the first place. Ive only shot someone up once and ill never do it again. I guess some people pick up on it in a snap, and others are..slow?
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I know I could have figured it out but thankfully I am very lazy by nature and didn't have that much motivation to keep stabbing myself. I found just squirting the solution up my nose worked pretty damn good. Plus I knew the road that shooting would take me down and I didn't really want to go there. I already could do a lot of dope I didn't want to make my habit worse.
 
somnilicious said:
I can't sleep and they have Trainspotting and Drugstore Cowboy playing back to back. I can't help but watch but it is such a trigger. It's 5am and I'm kicking with Matt Dillon and William S. Burroughs. I just can't get past my addiction to drug porn its almost as addictive as the drugs themselves.
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Great movies. Trainspotting wasn't actually a Burroughs book though. It was one of Irvine Welsh's.
 
Love Trainspotting....especially the part when Renton relapses and finds himself at the Mother Superior's place and they act as if they're in a fancy restaurant..."Would you like an appetizer to start?"..."No thank you let's just proceed to the intravenous injection of hard drugs, please"...haha kills me everytime!!!
 
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ohshea said:
Sorry but I dont get the whole "i cant shoot" thing. Its not brain surgery, its sticking a fucking pin in your arm and pulling back then pushing in. Especially guys, you fuckers got big ass bulgy veins! Whats the hang up? In no way am I advocating needle use, but I definitley think if you cant even figure out how to work a pin, then it doesnt need to be in your hand in the first place. Ive only shot someone up once and ill never do it again. I guess some people pick up on it in a snap, and others are..slow?
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My issue is everytime I get it in I cant pull back blood for some reason there has to be something I'm doing wrong and I'm not 100% sure what it is.
 
^^

You're not in a vein then. It could be you're not going in at the correct angle, ya know? Either not going deep enough or going too deep. Did you watch that video I sent you via PM a while ago of the guy IV'ing? That's what you wanna do. What needles are you using and which vein are you trying to hit?
 
the last time I bought heroin I went into this mcdonalds to get situated and warm up while waiting for the bus and there's this random ass dude in a wheelchair stuck like halfway out of the handicapped stall and I just look at him and go "you alright man?" and he's just shaking his head but not saying anything until I notice one of the leg holders was getting caught on the side of the stall (poor excuse for a handicap stall McDs, step your shit up) so I basically have to get into the bathroom stall to pull the guys chair back and angle it properly.

Except when I walk into the bathroom stall the dude didnt even fucking flush and there was shit all over the toilet seat. So I was polite and didnt say anything (how can you even freak out on someone in a wheelchair?) and wheeled him out into the dining area before returning into the bathroom. Since using the stall was out of the question at this point I just crudely railed two bags over the sink and slurped down the rest of my lemonade (free refills ftw) before walking outside the bathroom... and the guy is in the same place I left him at, directly outside the door just causing traffic congestion really.

I felt bad because he was probably on mad drugs and unable to really do what he wanted to do or communicate with people what he was trying to do but when you start feeling bad for everyone you run into while buying heroin you'll never have any fucking time/money left to even buy the dope in the first place.

I'll wheel you out of the bathroom so you dont have to sit in the smell of shit all day, but I got a bus to catch man and there's always FUBU PEACEEEEE

also, out of all the black stereotypes in existence the menthol cig preference isnt even a stereotype IMO, just fact. Can't understand it for the life of me, never seen a black person smoking non-menthol cigs.

and Im racist but not racist at the same time but im 100% serious, I can't recall a single incident of someone who was black preferring non-menthol cigs
 
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