It does suck for the guy cause he does go out and spend a lot and has to ask, blah, blah.... just like dating. I have always felt guys get the shitty part of the deal on some of these things.
In my case, we have gotten several household "toys" over the past year or so since being engaged/married that almost add up to the cost of my ring, so I factor those things in. Granted they are things we both use, but I would never have bought them, and that money could have gone towards other things just like my ring money could have. I thought he was nuts to spend so much. On my ring and on many things he gets, but he can spend his money as he chooses. We have separate bank accounts, but those kinds of major purchases all take away from savings we could have had. But I don't mind, we work hard and like to get good things. He was the same way with my ring. He won't buy a shitty T.V., so why would he buy a shitty ring?
I actually did say I wanted to pay for his band (which cost more than my band), he said that was dumb. He looks at it all as "our" money in the long run, plus he knows he makes three times as much as I do and knows I'd use credit. In the end both were paid for from our "wedding fund" we started after getting engaged.
Expecting, wanting, appreciating and enjoying things are all very different terms. I think it sucks if a guy is with a girl that expects a high price tag/size on the ring she gets. I am not that kind, so I can't say I feel guilty. I never pushed on marriage, a ring type/size, or even knew it was coming. I would have never picked out my own ring (or been allowed to) or told him what he got was too small or that I didn't like it, I lucked out, I can't feel guilty about what I got. It was his choice, based on what he could afford. He paid for my ring in full. He is very much his own man and wouldn't be pressured on something like that.