Mental Health Coming off Invega Sustenna (Paliperidone) v3

[John78]

Hello Bluelighters. I have an extremely powerful experience to report and maybe some of you can give me insight on it. Before psychosis I was extremely spiritual and loved everything having to do with energy and these types of experiences. After invega I eventually healed, but I completely shut myself off to my spiritual side because I was afraid of anything close to relapsing. Recently I had my first ever OBE and astral projecting was something I had been trying YEARS to achieve. It started with frequent lucid dreams then one astral projecting experience where I was able to command my spirit to move outside of my body. Lately I’ve been abusing minor drugs (Just Xanax and kratom) and alcohol, and I’ve come off of them. I don’t usually withdrawal. Last night I had several (at least 7) astral experiences which were extremely different from my normal lucid dreams, I knew they were astral related. I woke up this morning and brushed it off not wanting to fall down the rabbit hole of spiritual psychosis again. So I decided to take another nap before getting ready for the day. As I laid asleep I felt extreme vibrating like energy constantly going through my body, I was half conscious and I could see even though my body was asleep and my eyes were closed. I thought I was having a seizure and died because next thing I knew I was standing next to my bed and something(?) was preventing me from looking at my body on my bed. I kept thinking of my girlfriend and how horrible she would feel to know that I had died. Then within an instant I was back in my body and saw this alien like entity hovering towards me. Then I woke up. But the strangest part is that after this, I feel way more aware of everything around me. It’s hard to explain, from conversations to the TV, to the birds and people outside. It’s like I’m aware of all these things at one time; on top of that I felt like shit last night and after the alien experience this morning I feel like a whole new person. Like I was reborn. I decided to work on my diet, I’m quite fit but I want to start eating veggies again. Anyway, anyone could know what happened? I starting to consider that there could be life after death.

my experience with an entity wasn't really all that similar, but i was crying one night because everyone my grade graduated, and i closed my eyes for a second, and as soon as i did that, all of the sudden i was sitting in front of a meditating figure in white robes or something in a wheat field with all the wheat around us padded down, and as soon as i looked at his face (his face was just mist. i heard about it being like that in the astral realm) my conciousness launched up into the sky and i saw beatiful trees with a clear river and in the distance was fog glowing early morning golden hour sunlight. i physically tried to turn my head and look around but that's what snapped me out of it. it was so vivid. i saw everything clearly. it was unreal. i wish i could've stayed for longer or atleast go back.

 

[John78]

30 more days until I hit my 300 day mark. I honestly don’t have much faith. We will see. FUCK life was going so good man. That’s all I think about 24/7. Unreal

best of luck bro, i wish you well. some people take longer than what it says on the internet which blows. how many shots at what mg did you get, man?

 

[ixi]

Hey ixi,
I just wanted to post on your 2 month update because you were the only one to post to me when I was in deep depression and again I thank you so much girl and you are awesome. Anyway I just want to let you know that the brain fog will go away and yes I had it for 4 damn long months and it was horrific but I made it threw that insane period and girl you can to and you sound strong in your post you write. You will get better were you can understand and follow a movie it just takes time and it sucks badly. I can watch a movie and understand it and follow it, but I’m just not interested in anything anymore. You will have your periods back to and mine started back at month 3, but I also took cabergoline and I still take it. My bloodwork came back normal. You seem to be a caring loving person by your post and I enjoy reading them even though we are in a damn nightmare together. I will always send encouraging words to you and on the forum each month because it makes us want to continue fighting. I’m a loving person to and I miss feeling love so much, but I hope one day I can feel it again. You will recover ixi and you will feel better after each month that goes by, but remember it gets better gradually and trust me you won’t notice improvements daily, but you will notice improvements monthly I promise you. Listen the first 4 months was extreme hell for me and I don’t know how I didn’t die then. Oh month 5 and 6 are still hell but not extreme hell. It’s just everything is so damn boring. This is a long ass post but I wanted to give you hope like you did for me. Listen you will recover, you will get better, and you will feel improvements Monthly not daily. Star kid said to forget the first 7 months because they are the toughest. You are only 2 months right now but try not to think about it so much. Keep distracted as much as possible. It’s a long road for me to. I’m here for you. Keep strong you are going to kickass when you recover. GODSPEED ❤❤❤

thank you so much Paula I'm so touched u thought of me and took the time to write. it makes me happy to hear I was able to encourage you. you said v.3 doesn't have a poster like invegauser in v.2, I wish I had the brainpower/energy to be that for others. you have a big heart. you will feel love again. but, I definitely related to you feeling jealous of normal non-poisoned people, it's hard to feel happy for others in this state, which is terrible. this isn't me. I read somewhere "reacting in a fucked up way to a fucked up situation doesn't make you fucked up." I think that's true, just have to keep being patient and gentle with ourselves.. I didn't update this month because not much seemed to change. thanks for reminding me progress is gradual. ♡ I think my thoughts are a little clearer but that's not saying much. My intelligence was the most important to me and I can't accept losing it. honestly I am suicidal, I want to get back everything I lost, and Im scared I won't. Thanks again for thinking of me. I really have full faith in you recovering.
Godspeed friend ❤❤❤

 

[mrwelladjusted]

Today I started taking 150mg of pregabaline. It helped with my anxiety a little, but for some reason I'm shaking as fuck xD hopefully it will pass. I decided not to take St. John's Wort. Now, after my research, I know that inducing metabolism of the drug WILL make the side effects worse. I'm too much scared that my condition gets worse if I take SJW and I have to go to school in September, so I'll stick to the natural metabolism and elimination of the drug.

If someone decides to take SJW - bear in mind it will most likely make your side effects worse, though it will speed up elimination of the drug. Something for something. I'll fight this "medicine" for as long as it takes. Even if it doesn't stop making me being a vegetable after 5 years, I will still be here with you guys, I'll never give up. I never do.

 

[Masterp423]

No way! I am as well. It's shitty being targeted I feel you.

Really? That’s cool! Do you have a Youtube channel or are you on social media?

 

[Masterp423]

30 more days until I hit my 300 day mark. I honestly don’t have much faith. We will see. FUCK life was going so good man. That’s all I think about 24/7. Unreal

You’re still not recovered after 300 days?

 

[Masterp423]

R

what happens to you? my mom claims she's been a target individual. i don't rememver what happened to her but i remember a cop the next house over was involved or someshit. doctors would probably label it paranoid schizophrenia tbh so don't bring it up to them and maybe your parents.

Really? That’s interesting. A targeted individual is somebody who has a natural firewall for their brain that the IBM supercomputer couldn’t clone. The IBM supercomputer cloned our brains and souls to replace it with AI on august 8 2019 from 6 pm-9pm local time for me (Central). There are a lot of fake TI’s out there but I’d say probably half in the community are real TI’s. We get shit like gangstalking,v2k,you see a lot of people driving around with one headlight,some TI’s get poisoned but it doesn’t happen to me. I mainly get gangstalking,v2k,gaslighting,”welfare checks”,institutionalizations,gaslighting,. I have a Youtube channel but I don’t really post anything but my buddy Wayne who’s a TI in Australia has some good videos. One of my favorites of his is titled Gangstalking Rough Night. He’s been through some similar experiences as me

 

[Masterp423]

what happens to you? my mom claims she's been a target individual. i don't rememver what happened to her but i remember a cop the next house over was involved or someshit. doctors would probably label it paranoid schizophrenia tbh so don't bring it up to them and maybe your parents.

What does your mom say about her targeting?

 

[haldolhell]

Hey ixi,
I just wanted to post on your 2 month update because you were the only one to post to me when I was in deep depression and again I thank you so much girl and you are awesome. Anyway I just want to let you know that the brain fog will go away and yes I had it for 4 damn long months and it was horrific but I made it threw that insane period and girl you can to and you sound strong in your post you write. You will get better were you can understand and follow a movie it just takes time and it sucks badly. I can watch a movie and understand it and follow it, but I’m just not interested in anything anymore. You will have your periods back to and mine started back at month 3, but I also took cabergoline and I still take it. My bloodwork came back normal. You seem to be a caring loving person by your post and I enjoy reading them even though we are in a damn nightmare together. I will always send encouraging words to you and on the forum each month because it makes us want to continue fighting. I’m a loving person to and I miss feeling love so much, but I hope one day I can feel it again. You will recover ixi and you will feel better after each month that goes by, but remember it gets better gradually and trust me you won’t notice improvements daily, but you will notice improvements monthly I promise you. Listen the first 4 months was extreme hell for me and I don’t know how I didn’t die then. Oh month 5 and 6 are still hell but not extreme hell. It’s just everything is so damn boring. This is a long ass post but I wanted to give you hope like you did for me. Listen you will recover, you will get better, and you will feel improvements Monthly not daily. Star kid said to forget the first 7 months because they are the toughest. You are only 2 months right now but try not to think about it so much. Keep distracted as much as possible. It’s a long road for me to. I’m here for you. Keep strong you are going to kickass when you recover. GODSPEED ❤❤❤

Hey Paula i know your struggling a lot how come you don't smoke weed if it gets u high to distract yourself from your depression. Does weed still give u euphoria? and keeps u not depressed cause thats what it used to do for me

 

[Paula10]

Hey Paula i know your struggling a lot how come you don't smoke weed if it gets u high to distract yourself from your depression. Does weed still give u euphoria? and keeps u not depressed cause thats what it used to do for me

Weed does not give me euphoria. I do get a head high, but then I become paranoid and I’m too scared to fall in psychosis again which I did on three occasions of smoking weed. I just wish I had my emotions at least. I’m tired of waking up with no emotions.

 

[mrwelladjusted]

I just want to let you know today I have a "somewhat window". I woke up really tired, I was in bed for an hour after I woke up, didn't have the strenght to get up. But when I did, I started to feel a bit better. Music sounds so good. Like really, really good, I'm listening to some songs and I'm crying, it seems like my emotions are there and the enjoyment of listening to music is with me all the time, sometimes I enjoy it more, sometimes less. So I'm having an emotional day, but my intelligence, anxiety and problems with speech haven't improved really. This is weird, why am I enjoying listening to music, being emotional, but at the same time also being really stupid and anxious all the time?

E: I think it might as well be the effect of pregabaline. But pregabaline wouldn't give me emotions, so I don't know

 

[Paula10]

This is truly a nightmare and I regret it everyday. I wish I never got hospitalized so many times. I swear I wish I could go back in time and change myself to the better. I do believe this is my punishment for my wrong doings to myself and others who I truly love so much. Invega destroyed my emotion love so I don’t feel love for no one not even my own children who I know I truly love them but I don’t feel it anymore which is extremely sad for me and I’m in deep depression everyday. I asked God to forgive me several times but nothing has happen yet. I fear I won’t see the end of this hell. I fear my emotions are gone forever at this point. I have fears every single day I have depression every single day and anxiety every single day. I can’t take much more of this it’s extremely hard and I wish I had a easy way out. I’m sorry for being negative but I’m losing hope everyday. Good luck to everyone going threw hell right now. Let’s hope we will make it to the finish line. GODSPEED

 

[mrwelladjusted]

This is truly a nightmare and I regret it everyday. I wish I never got hospitalized so many times. I swear I wish I could go back in time and change myself to the better. I do believe this is my punishment for my wrong doings to myself and others who I truly love so much. Invega destroyed my emotion love so I don’t feel love for no one not even my own children who I know I truly love them but I don’t feel it anymore which is extremely sad for me and I’m in deep depression everyday. I asked God to forgive me several times but nothing has happen yet. I fear I won’t see the end of this hell. I fear my emotions are gone forever at this point. I have fears every single day I have depression every single day and anxiety every single day. I can’t take much more of this it’s extremely hard and I wish I had a easy way out. I’m sorry for being negative but I’m losing hope everyday. Good luck to everyone going threw hell right now. Let’s hope we will make it to the finish line. GODSPEED

We will make it to the finish line, every each one of us will eventually. Everything's reversible, the time of recovery depends on how many shots an individual had, what doses, genetic predispositions such as metabolism and so on. I'm truly sorry for your inability to feel emotions, I wish you could begin to love your kids the same way you used to, right away. Unfortunately, we have to wait, but this waiting is worth it. When you'll finally recover, you'll start to appreciate your life 10 times more, life will be beautiful. What we have to do is wait and trust science. There might be ways to recover faster, I'm doing my research everyday, so maybe I'll find something useful.

Did you buy your SJW? If so, let me know about your experiences with it.

My thoughts are that what we experience is linked with the reduction of dopamine receptors sensitivity. After 5, 6 and more months the daily distributed dose is already pretty low, so I'm guessing the amount of poison left in our system is not necessarily our biggest problem. I'm talking to people on different groups and forums about this and we're constantly looking forward to find something that may help us. I'll eventually probably try some supplements, except SJW, in my case it's not going to be effective, but you can try.

As I said, the poison left in our systems is not necessarily our biggest problem. I've seen cases of people not recovering fast after oral antipsychotics, like after 4 months they weren't fine. So maybe we can try to treat this with supplements or other drugs.

 

[ihateinvega]

Unfortunately, with Invega Sustenna, I don't think there's much you can do to speed up recovery. I think losing fat can help you get more of the drug out of your body, but it may actually cause you to take longer to recover. Diet and supplements might help you recover faster.

I think most people recover, but it takes time. It can take months and even years to recover. I think the amount of Invega active in my system is pretty low right now since I've been recovering for over 7 months. But even that low amount of the drug can be devastating. My lack of motivation (I think the most harmful side effect of this drug for me) is about the same as it has been when I got my last shot, and I think it's going to stay that way until the drug is almost gone or compeltely gone. This is a powerful drug.

I'm not expecting recovery for months, largely because I'm in the process of getting rid of fat which may release more of the drug into my system. Fortunately, I think I've lost about 15 pounds so far and I haven't noticed any of the side effects that I used to have come back.

 

[AlphaMethylPhenyl]

I feel like the placebo effect can be pretty strong here. Studies suggest that the placebo effect can be significant. Believing you're ill is probably not the right mindset. Also, recovery never is straight line. I would expect that, at times, things seem to stall.

That said, I see a lot of negative content here by people whom have had bad reactions from Invega. I don't mean to offend, and I know that many of you don't trust the pharmaceutical industry, but some of these cases might be depression, which there are various treatments for--not just meds, but positive habits. For what it's worth, depression is almost always related to serotonin than to dopamine, but that's not to say "take such and such serotonergic substance". I think that this sort of recovery is heavily based on developing productive structure in your life.

This is a good thread to have. But I want to keep things optimistic. Without a doubt, I've experienced my situation and life being utterly dismal. I thought that things wouldn't get better, absolutely, and that I'd live a life of hell on Earth. But things have changed. Things have gotten much better for me. I will hope and pray for all of the struggling people who post here.

I want to say one more thing. I think that people are of mind, body, and spirit. All need to be tended to by ourselves as adults. For my mind, I take classes. For my body, I exercise on a schedule and go on walks. For spirit, I meditate, hand with friends, and try to help other people. It works.

 

[lifeline]

Hello all. Doing really well. Making good money. Mind feels clear. On 30 mg of abilify. Life is good. Hope all is well with everyone. Remember it took me two years to return to a normal state. Love you all. Take care. Don’t hesitate to reach pm if u need advise.

 

[Masterp423]

Hello all. Doing really well. Making good money. Mind feels clear. On 30 mg of abilify. Life is good. Hope all is well with everyone. Remember it took me two years to return to a normal state. Love you all. Take care. Don’t hesitate to reach pm if u need advise.

Jesus H my nigga two years? That’s fucking bananas

 

[mrwelladjusted]

Jesus H my nigga two years? That’s fucking bananas

Gotta love the way you've responded to that post. But yeah, I mean, wtf, in two years I'd be 23, I'd have lost probably two of the best years of my life. And I'm on Abilify Maintena. This is weird seeing someone that has recovered from Invega and then started to take same stuff that made me live in hell, saying that life is ok with Abilify. But I guess every organism has a different reaction to different drugs. If someone's ok with Abilify, then it's ok.

 

[mrwelladjusted]

Today I stop taking pridinol. I read that anticholinergic drugs may cause worsening cognition, problems with speech, anxiety. I don't know why I didn't think of it before. But if my akathisia comes back, then I'd have to come back to using it.

 

[lifeline]

Jesus H my nigga two years? That’s fucking bananas

Yes but I feel better than ever now