Chapter II: The Abyss is Eternal !

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Captain.Heroin said:
I know that feeling.

If I had to go this morning without THC I would be sweating/sleeping it off and whining and crying. I can't withdraw from THC. I've tried. Too many times. I'm defeated.

BK what is the longest you have gone without touching yourself?
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Probably like 2 months when I was doing heroin. In normal times though? A month I reckon, much longer if there's a lady in my life, then I don't really masturbate. My sex drive is probably around 1-3 sexy times in a day with lady friend. So like 7-21 times a week.
 
BK38 said:
Probably like 2 months when I was doing heroin. In normal times though? A month I reckon, much longer if there's a lady in my life, then I don't really masturbate. My sex drive is probably around 1-3 sexy times in a day with lady friend. So like 7-21 times a week.
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so if I am working out 20 times a week and then get to be lazy instead it is hard to get back into that groove with exercise.

It's easier with sex for me because I have legitimately lost any desire to touch my own dick, it is so banal and does not feel as good as sex. Like it doesn't "replace" for it. It's like "eating" where I do it to live not necessarily out of joy.
 
DeadManWalkin' said:
Well, I'm sure he would be happy if you took a cookbook in your hand and kept his legacy going on.
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DMW I couldn't cook for months after he died because I was severely depressed from it.

I did start cooking again, I remember a lot of what he taught me.

He always said there would be a day he wouldn't be around anymore and he wanted to teach me what he knew.
 
BK38 said:
Probably like 2 months when I was doing heroin. In normal times though? A month I reckon, much longer if there's a lady in my life, then I don't really masturbate. My sex drive is probably around 1-3 sexy times in a day with lady friend. So like 7-21 times a week.
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btw do you think ladies can't do the same thing

women love porn

almost all women I talk to admit to me they like gay porn because it's twice as many guys and there's no "threatening" nature of male on women activity (can be a thing women want to avoid who have a history of being abused/assaulted)

so they'll want to see two BBC jamals or my BBC pounding my latino dude and him squirming and groaning and shit... why are they going to need you

you have to be respectful to women by not deluding your brain with porn trash.

It's all fake. Fake lines, fake words, pretending to love it, making love to the camera, not each other.

People who watch porn too much seem disconnected, mentally absent, clueless, hopeless or just distracted in bed. My partner and I make a real connection and it is very real and deep and amazing and I couldn't exactly put it into words.
 
Captain.Heroin said:
btw do you think ladies can't do the same thing

women love porn

almost all women I talk to admit to me they like gay porn because it's twice as many guys and there's no "threatening" nature of male on women activity (can be a thing women want to avoid who have a history of being abused/assaulted)

so they'll want to see two BBC jamals or my BBC pounding my latino dude and him squirming and groaning and shit... why are they going to need you

you have to be respectful to women by not deluding your brain with porn trash.

It's all fake. Fake lines, fake words, pretending to love it, making love to the camera, not each other.

People who watch porn too much seem disconnected, mentally absent, clueless, hopeless or just distracted in bed. My partner and I make a real connection and it is very real and deep and amazing and I couldn't exactly put it into words.
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I think you're more invested in this than I am. Take it to SLR. With all due respect, I'm totally bored of this subject. I have no issues with porn. I don't use it often at all. I don't jerk off to excess and I have other things I'm focusing on rn. Namely getting my biz/finances in order so I can get the fuck out of this tiny French town. My prospects will improve dramatically after that. No more preaching plz, k, thx.
 
BK38 said:
I think you're more invested in this than I am. Take it to SLR. With all due respect, I'm totally bored of this subject. I have no issues with porn. I don't use it often at all. I don't jerk off to excess and I have other things I'm focusing on rn. Namely getting my biz/finances in order so I can get the fuck out of this tiny French town. My prospects will improve dramatically after that. No more preaching plz, k, thx.
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oh I don't care man I'm just picking up DMW's schtick

if you were a lounger long enough you know I'm like a schtick sponge

I absorbed MEL's schtick for a while

I stole "that's hot.gif" from w01f

And to be fair I look at porn from time to time. I do. I don't orgasm to it, I save it up for sex. So I'm being a hypocrite schtick sponge for the lols.

Every time I type "porn cuck" I'm laughing my ass off.
 
Captain.Heroin said:
oh I don't care man I'm just picking up DMW's schtick

if you were a lounger long enough you know I'm like a schtick sponge

I absorbed MEL's schtick for a while

I stole "that's hot.gif" from w01f

And to be fair I look at porn from time to time. I do. I don't orgasm to it, I save it up for sex. So I'm being a hypocrite schtick sponge for the lols.

Every time I type "porn cuck" I'm laughing my ass off.
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Yeah, time to get a new one. It's getting old, fast. It was funny, now it's just a chore reading these cuck diatribes.
 
wait @BK38 are you legit broke

like you're STUCK in france because lack of $$? Is that it?

I know air travel was prohibitively expensive but I think it got cheaper because less people are flying right?

How much do you need?

In US we got checks, UE, etc. our gov't was going to make sure America could stay spun.
 
BK38 said:
You got an eyeroll out of me.
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21jw5qPOkhL._SX331_BO1,204,203,200_.jpg


How much do you need to escape France?
 
Captain.Heroin said:
wait @BK38 are you legit broke

like you're STUCK in france because lack of $$? Is that it?

I know air travel was prohibitively expensive but I think it got cheaper because less people are flying right?

How much do you need?

In US we got checks, UE, etc. our gov't was going to make sure America could stay spun.
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Not completely broke, but I don't have enough to move somewhere and pay first and last and spend some time job hunting and getting set up. That's why I'm trying to earn some cash while I'm here, save on rent and then make a move when this Covid shit dies down a bit. Also, I want to have my own writing biz, so I am focusing on that while here.
 
Captain.Heroin said:
21jw5qPOkhL._SX331_BO1,204,203,200_.jpg


How much do you need to escape France?
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Living here and not earning for like 6 months + has eaten all my savings, which weren't huge, but not tiny either. I think I'll be fine to move with 3k + rent for the first month. It depends on where I go though and how much writing work I'll be getting.
 
BK38 said:
Not completely broke, but I don't have enough to move somewhere and pay first and last and spend some time job hunting and getting set up. That's why I'm trying to earn some cash while I'm here, save on rent and then make a move when this Covid shit dies down a bit. Also, I want to have my own writing biz, so I am focusing on that while here.
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Sounds good.

I need to get work again but I feel like that's never going to happen with Trump at the helm.
 
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