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Smoking more chron than I can afford tonight. Just one of those nights. Picked a quarter earlier it was great. I gotta emphasize the nostalgia of oldschool dealing even though cops are pretty much instructed not to enforce pot laws. Much more fun than a store, just that stoner dude who always has the chron. He's like I gotchu mane I'm like we'll see dawg well every time I take my last bong rip I am about to meet up. Nice to have dependability like that. We are so discreet just cause we're I guess you could at least say quasi-oldschool stoners been blazing for 15 years and smoked a lotta homegrow.

Man smoking that indica along with the hybrid really balances the hybrid out. Which is sorta funny since as a species a hybrid is a form of balance. This one had to be toned down a little bit, especially considering my anxiety has been through the roof not much more than a month off oxy's again. So many problems waking up to I might spontaneously self implode. Tonight though, I got my etiz and I got my chron in my bong : )
 
I weighed my AVB and apparently I've only used about a half ounce total since I started in late September, and I've been high almost every day the last couple months lol
 
I's BL black week, to pay respects to bluelighters that have passed from OD. Not sure if it applies to him but with Vortech's passing it seems to fit the sombre mood.

Shroomy, such a good feeling to buy a bag knowing you're gonna smoke it all that day. Even better when you smoke all you can and wake up with a leftover nug!

I'm a big fan of etiz but only have what's stuck to the bag left. Been leaving two week breaks to maximize what I can get out of it, always end up wanting more the day after but I've been successful so far haha. This weekend will be another two weeks though =D
 
Best feeling having chron to smoke and the time to smoke it. It was a beautiful day yesterday too, I spent the afternoon smoking bong in random suburban spots. Sunny day, snowy vistas. Smoked bong before morning yoga and that was great too. I've been in a giggly mood for most of this time, pretty baked smokin all that bong.

I have a few more nugs to burn through today, and tomorrow... then I'll need to get more haha.

Etiz works well for panic / extreme anxiety. It increases prolactin levels and seems to cause blepharospasm though. I'd take alprazolam over it, xanax's are more sedating.
 
Moxious said:
I's BL black week, to pay respects to bluelighters that have passed from OD. Not sure if it applies to him but with Vortech's passing it seems to fit the sombre mood.

Shroomy, such a good feeling to buy a bag knowing you're gonna smoke it all that day. Even better when you smoke all you can and wake up with a leftover nug!

I'm a big fan of etiz but only have what's stuck to the bag left. Been leaving two week breaks to maximize what I can get out of it, always end up wanting more the day after but I've been successful so far haha. This weekend will be another two weeks though =D
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I've been here nearly a decade and never knew wtf was going on when BL turned black. I always thought I got fucked up the night before and fucked around with the settings on my browser.
 
Moxious said:
I'm a big fan of etiz but only have what's stuck to the bag left. Been leaving two week breaks to maximize what I can get out of it, always end up wanting more the day after but I've been successful so far haha. This weekend will be another two weeks though =D
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Indeed, Etiz is very compulsive. Some people black out on only a few mg, I usually end up taking closer to ten even without a tolerance and never even know that I've blacked out. It took me a whole week and seven viewings to watch the pilot of Jewel in the Crown because I took 5+mg of etizolam each night. I'd wake up in the morning without a clue about the plot lol.

Jibult said:
I've been here nearly a decade and never knew wtf was going on when BL turned black. I always thought I got fucked up the night before and fucked around with the settings on my browser.
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:|
 
Cream Gravy? said:
Indeed, Etiz is very compulsive. Some people black out on only a few mg, I usually end up taking closer to ten even without a tolerance and never even know that I've blacked out. It took me a whole week and seven viewings to watch the pilot of Jewel in the Crown because I took 5+mg of etizolam each night. I'd wake up in the morning without a clue about the plot lol.


:|
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Etiz is fucked. Benzos are fucked in general but so are daily panic attacks that make it impossible to function. I switched back to xanax bars today after being on almost exclusively etiz for a year, kpins and diaz when I had them, and it has hit me like a ton of bricks with chill sedation at a way lower dose. Etiz is uplifting, but amnesic, and one doesn't realize how fucked up they are. It raises tolerance so damn fast, has an increased prevalence of blepharospasm compared to other benzos, and can rarely cause skin lesions which I think I have actually noticed on my hands a bit. The prolactin increase will decrease testosterone and therefore libido, and it can cause puffy nipples / man tits that shit I def do not want if I'm gonna ruin my life with benzos I may as well keep my hormones in reasonable balance. It feels so good to at least be back on a classical benzo for now. I'm not doing shit until I've been clean for longer as I keep chronically relapsing and it's draining my spirit more and more each time.

So happy to be takin xanax and smokin chron. I'm well over a month clean of opiates and starting to feel amazing. Been to 20 hot yoga classes since the start of the year and I am looking and feeling great. Went blond recently, it is trippy as I normally have dark hair. got 5 conch piercings in a cool kinda arrangement, 2 angled and 3 straight back. Chick I have a crush on had to take her triple lobes out because she is silly, her tragus is somehow fine I don't get it cartilage piercings are insane to heal. I salt water soak with tea tree oil 10 min daily. Anyways, nice to spend money on something other than opiates, smoke more chron and I had a few dates last December with a foxy chick. Improvement from junkie status, I literally spent 6 months of last year (approx) severely heroin sick, a lot of the rest struggling, and probably a quarter of the time feeling at peace. It was hell and the worst year of my life and snorting that shit was the biggest mistake of my life.

Man worst is when harvest runs dry and suddenly you're buying quarter rather than smoking pounds... I love good outdoor. I owe some of my detox to chain smoking them girl scout cookies.
 
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WHERE THE FUCK DO YOU GUYS FIND ETIZOLAM, CHRIST

not really sourcing but god damn, every time I found a reputable vendor they were suddenly out of stock, and that was 2(?) years ago. That shit is like a phantom to me, man, everyone talks about it but it's never been seen.
 
You serious? Prob with me is it became more expensive at around the rate my tolerance was rising. The reason I've been using it for the past year almost exclusively is that I have near-immediate access to the pure.

Good alprazolam presses were harder to find for me. I strongly prefer it, and I am nicely sedated today.

I had a half ounce stocked from like 2012 haha.
 
Yeah, man, I only looked for a day or two after a Xanax binge but I just couldn't find anything that was advertised and in-stock from a domestic company. Maybe my problem was not fuckin' with those Chinese websites, eh?


Either way, I'm benzo'-clean now... well, relatively. One milligram after that dead cat bullshit doesn't really change the recreational aspect.
 
Man, this is irritating isn't it. I can get it around the corner, but the prices are astronomical now. Even if I had a job it would be an annoying expense. I stocked up in 2012 and ran out this year. Even alprazolam is expensive now. Nah man you made the right choice there.

I doubt I will ever be benzo clean. I have been on them so long and had chronic extreme anxiety and panic attacks for a year before I started. Been opiate clean for bout 5 weeks though. I'd never be able to find good H anymore anyway. Nothing's really changed yet, although I don't wake up sick anymore. Trying to be patient.

Feeling normal while being used to extreme chronic anxiety leaving one mentally paralyzed by it and dysfunctional has its perks. Switching from etiz to alpraz has been great. Fucking fuck zans. I've had 3 bars before getting out of bed to do anything more than brush my teeth and take 3 bong rips of indica. I'm burnt... and I have a fucking nice job opportunity today. Nothing fancy or using my education in any way but I do have the experience and it'd be real chill.
 
I actually prefer xans too, but want to extinguish my stash of etiz first since I have so little. Xans are easier to dose and have a better effect ime, more sedative. Which makes it weird that I find etiz more compulsive. Etiz has definitely got more expensive but I can't say that alpraz has. Gonna stock up with a few hundred bars once I get my finances sorted

Good luck with the job dude
 
Thanks dude. It was hit or miss I guess, but helpful for my reintegration into society regardless.

Xans are so much better man. I'm so happy to be back on them and my plan is also to have several hundred bars once my finances are legit. I hated being broke and stuck with nothing but etizolam, it's nice sometimes but not a benzo for regular use.

It's more compulsive somehow, even though xanax gives me a noticeable hit and if anything I should be getting cravings for those, as they are capable of making me very numb to anything that bothers me. No euphoria, but if I ever start to panic and want everything to fuck off I'd certainly choose alprazolam. It's a little cloudier but that is kind of what I'm looking for in benzos.

After that interview I gotta take a few less bars these next few days though haha. I was much more nervous than I thought I would be. It was a casual social kinda thing but that is just how they hire their leaders. I had 4 shots of espresso I was quite sedated.
 
Anecdotally, how long of a break do you guys recommend someone takes from weed before their mind is pretty much fully clear and they can make the proper decision as to whether to continue with their habit or not? I'm not talking "LEAFLY SAYS 2 DAYS RESETS YOUR CANNABINOID RECEPTORS!!!" I mean, what do you personally believe based on your experience?
 
^One month.

I just took a month off. Thought about weed daily. Realized I never want to have off time again lol. In moderation, of course.
 
Let me know if you have any epiphanies about the mind fog when you start using again (or I assume you already have, let me know about any day after fog or anything). When I first started using, I would almost always feel super foggy the next morning and often into the day. I don't feel that much anymore, and I'm not sure if the fog has just become a part of life and I can't perceive it, or (and I'm actually leaning toward this personally) because I have a small tolerance now, the mind fog is so minimal it's often imperceptible. Of course when I hit it super hard or combine it with CBD, I'll feel foggy still. Just not so much with a light stone anymore.
 
I took 6 months off and when I smoked again I wasn't as fond of it as I thought I would be. It was still enjoyable but it doesn't seem worth all the extremes I was going through before for it. I ended up buying a vape pen even still and started smoking daily again. Now that I'm smoking daily for about a month, it seems hard to go with out it and I find myself craving it first thing and then throughout the day. I have to quit again for a job. Definitely wasn't planning on smoking this much for this long, now it seems a lot harder to quit.

But yeah, after about 1-2 months I quit having cravings for it and really noticed how much more clear headed and organized I felt. It took longer for the craving or urge to get high went away than it did for my mind to "clear" up. It's not like an opiate craving, but there were some anxious nights when a few nice big dabs sounded like the best thing in the world. Apart from having trouble sleeping or having surges of strong emotions, my desire to smoke was mostly just because it was a social activity and just something to do and enjoy.
 
The Network said:
Let me know if you have any epiphanies about the mind fog when you start using again (or I assume you already have, let me know about any day after fog or anything). When I first started using, I would almost always feel super foggy the next morning and often into the day. I don't feel that much anymore, and I'm not sure if the fog has just become a part of life and I can't perceive it, or (and I'm actually leaning toward this personally) because I have a small tolerance now, the mind fog is so minimal it's often imperceptible. Of course when I hit it super hard or combine it with CBD, I'll feel foggy still. Just not so much with a light stone anymore.
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I don't feel foggy so much as I feel hungover, so to speak. It's real hard to get going in the morning. Otherwise I feel just as sharp when I'm not high as I did when clean really.
 
I got bored as fuck around noon today. Super cold outside (well, for here anyway), nothing to do, ended my break 4 days in. I wasn't actually set on going a week or two or anything, I just kinda randomly felt like stopping and seeing how I felt one day and then continued until I decided it wasn't worth it.

However, currently, I have maybe somewhere around a quarter of an ounce in my stash which should last a while, but anyway I'm just going to see what I feel like when I run out. I'm not going to buy any more stuff (the exception maybe being high CBD very low THC stuff) until at least when I run out of my current stash. Kinda just to see what's up and everything. Maybe I won't feel like keeping a huge stash around and I'll turn into a weekend stoner or something instead of near-daily.
 
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