starfarer
Bluelighter
As some of you may remember, I had a little DHC habit going a year or so back. This spiralled way outa control this year at university (Liverpool) and I had no other choice but to go onto bupe.
Im on pure buprenorphine at the moment, and initially it was the mother of all cures
I was stimulated, calm and most importantly withdrawal free. Even my moods began to stabilise right out, which was a huge boon for me given my anxiety.
Few months on however and the opiate cravings are back with a vengeance. Its not a physical craving necessarily, but an emotional/psychological one manifesting itself physically. In fact its an emotion I have never been subjected to ever, sort of like a deep down violent longing - its a profoundly human emotion, not like one that which you'd expect from a chemical.
Im using naltrexone on the ultra low at the moment and its working wonders as i've bumped down 1mg with little discernible effect and as I type im still "buzzing" from a dose taken almost 12 hours ago. I have noticed that 1/2 mg feels like 1.5mg in intensity and even duration which has stumped me somewhat.
The issue is I cant get back to the old days
since Bupe is squatting on those receptors and no amount of full agonism is gonna change that. Ive considered stopping the bupe and dosing with a high potency opioid to fill the cracks so to speak and slowly but surely increasing the dose until im off the bupe and onto the full agonist. My theory is that it will occupy the free receptors and the remaining bupe will remain on already triggered receptors. As time goes by the ration of FA to Bupe will sway to the left.
I am aware my tolerance has shot up like a bitch, and im almost double where I was, however I have a sensationally cheap provider and so cost doesn't factor into it 8) though how long that will last is anyone's guess.
I'm glad I went onto the bupe as I was in a situation where my anxiety levels were kicking my ass to the curb and I had to kick DHC. There was no way I was ever going to manage both. At least this way i've been able to go at my own pace.
Oh and its good to be back guys - i've missed BL for real :D
Im on pure buprenorphine at the moment, and initially it was the mother of all cures
I was stimulated, calm and most importantly withdrawal free. Even my moods began to stabilise right out, which was a huge boon for me given my anxiety.Few months on however and the opiate cravings are back with a vengeance. Its not a physical craving necessarily, but an emotional/psychological one manifesting itself physically. In fact its an emotion I have never been subjected to ever, sort of like a deep down violent longing - its a profoundly human emotion, not like one that which you'd expect from a chemical.
Im using naltrexone on the ultra low at the moment and its working wonders as i've bumped down 1mg with little discernible effect and as I type im still "buzzing" from a dose taken almost 12 hours ago. I have noticed that 1/2 mg feels like 1.5mg in intensity and even duration which has stumped me somewhat.
The issue is I cant get back to the old days
since Bupe is squatting on those receptors and no amount of full agonism is gonna change that. Ive considered stopping the bupe and dosing with a high potency opioid to fill the cracks so to speak and slowly but surely increasing the dose until im off the bupe and onto the full agonist. My theory is that it will occupy the free receptors and the remaining bupe will remain on already triggered receptors. As time goes by the ration of FA to Bupe will sway to the left.I am aware my tolerance has shot up like a bitch, and im almost double where I was, however I have a sensationally cheap provider and so cost doesn't factor into it 8) though how long that will last is anyone's guess.
I'm glad I went onto the bupe as I was in a situation where my anxiety levels were kicking my ass to the curb and I had to kick DHC. There was no way I was ever going to manage both. At least this way i've been able to go at my own pace.
Oh and its good to be back guys - i've missed BL for real :D

