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  • EADD Moderators: Pissed_and_messed | Shinji Ikari

Benzo Discussion v4

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Mugz said:
its just as much an addiction as crack or gear mate, I cant control myself]


phone me, distract me
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If distraction will work why not try distracting yourself by leaving the house, as has already been suggested?

It isn't fair to put the pressure on others like that. They may be more than willing to help, but you're essentially saying 'talk to me or I'll do something stupid'. It may not seem so from your point of view, but that's what's happening.

Ultimately it comes down to you. There will always be a time when others are busy or unable to help.
 
Mugz, this is just a repeat of how you were before you took your 2 month break.

Why not give your card to your dad or something? Or confess to him what you've been doing?
 
you really need to ban yourself man! nothing good will come from it. even if you win, you will inevitably lose more in the long run because you have no control.
 
Get paid spunk money rinse n repeat .
At least you have a better support network though . Enough of this anyway tis the Benzo thread .

I got 2 of those Midazolam ampoules in the end . I'm a save em till i have a suitable OPiate to go with them
 
If I lost a tenner, it would kill me, because im unemployed ( through no fault of my own). Thats crazy losing 350 - where does your income come from dude? I only ask because if its secondary, you should cut the card - give it to your dad, or make any large amount, out of reach!
 
I figured out it was only aabout £200 and I transferred my dad £300 for safe keeping as a savings starter, so just have about 60 in cash to last me the month, but I get my meals and stuff so it should be doable. im gonna get fired soon too so I'll be able to go onto benefits.
 
Mugz said:
I figured out it was only aabout £200 and I transferred my dad £300 for safe keeping as a savings starter, so just have about 60 in cash to last me the month, but I get my meals and stuff so it should be doable. im gonna get fired soon too so I'll be able to go onto benefits.
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I hope that wasnt from the 'pay me for charity' funds we transferred!
 
Mugz said:
its just as much an addiction as crack or gear mate, I cant control myself
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12 Step bullshit. One of the main reasons I fukkin loathe the 12 Step approach. You are not "powerless over my addiction". You do not need a higher power to save you from yourself. You are the only one who can do that and the sooner you realise and accept that the sooner you can do something about it. It's that whole bullshit 12 Step "powerless" crap that results in the vast majority of 12 Steppers becoming permanently locked into an endless cycle of addiction, sabbatical, relapse, guilt, shame, addiction, guilt, shame, addiction, sabbatical, relapse, guilt, shame, addiction... There's good reason why it doesn't work and this is that good reason.

I really think you'd be a lot better off leaning more towards the other support group options - the non-12 Step, secular ones that have been proven time and time again to be vastly more effective at bringing about real and lasting changes. Support from fellow addicts can be a great help... but it needs to be constructive support without all that guiltripping and induced shame and - above all - the realisation that you and you alone are the only thing that can change your behaviour. Ain't no higher powers involved. And if there are they've made it abundantly clear they give nary a toss about magicking away addictions.

One drink does not a drunk make. One bout of other drug use does not a binge make. One night of gambling does not a home be lost. It's perfectly natural that such things will happen when trying to change long-established patterns of behaviour and beating yourself up - with or without encouragement from other self-made whipping boys - doesn't help. So you slipped up and "lost control". So try not to do the same today. Really is as simple and as difficult as that.

/anti-12 Step rant

Don't give up giving up <3
 
Shambles said:
12 Step bullshit. One of the main reasons I fukkin loathe the 12 Step approach. You are not "powerless over my addiction". You do not need a higher power to save you from yourself. You are the only one who can do that and the sooner you realise and accept that the sooner you can do something about it. It's that whole bullshit 12 Step "powerless" crap that results in the vast majority of 12 Steppers becoming permanently locked into an endless cycle of addiction, sabbatical, relapse, guilt, shame, addiction, guilt, shame, addiction, sabbatical, relapse, guilt, shame, addiction... There's good reason why it doesn't work and this is that good reason.

I really think you'd be a lot better off leaning more towards the other support group options - the non-12 Step, secular ones that have been proven time and time again to be vastly more effective at bringing about real and lasting changes. Support from fellow addicts can be a great help... but it needs to be constructive support without all that guiltripping and induced shame and - above all - the realisation that you and you alone are the only thing that can change your behaviour. Ain't no higher powers involved. And if there are they've made it abundantly clear they give nary a toss about magicking away addictions.

One drink does not a drunk make. One bout of other drug use does not a binge make. One night of gambling does not a home be lost. It's perfectly natural that such things will happen when trying to change long-established patterns of behaviour and beating yourself up - with or without encouragement from other self-made whipping boys - doesn't help. So you slipped up and "lost control". So try not to do the same today. Really is as simple and as difficult as that.

/anti-12 Step rant

Don't give up giving up <3
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very well said!

i think you should take a look at some buddhist teachings. they are not about worshiping gods or any of that shit but simply training your mind to be happy and balanced which only you yourself can do. external forces may be a catalyst to changing your lifestyle but essentially 90% of your problems come from how think about things.

EDIT: that was directed at mugz, not shambles
 
Shambles said:
12 Step bullshit. One of the main reasons I fukkin loathe the 12 Step approach. You are not "powerless over my addiction". You do not need a higher power to save you from yourself. You are the only one who can do that and the sooner you realise and accept that the sooner you can do something about it. It's that whole bullshit 12 Step "powerless" crap that results in the vast majority of 12 Steppers becoming permanently locked into an endless cycle of addiction, sabbatical, relapse, guilt, shame, addiction, guilt, shame, addiction, sabbatical, relapse, guilt, shame, addiction... There's good reason why it doesn't work and this is that good reason.

I really think you'd be a lot better off leaning more towards the other support group options - the non-12 Step, secular ones that have been proven time and time again to be vastly more effective at bringing about real and lasting changes. Support from fellow addicts can be a great help... but it needs to be constructive support without all that guiltripping and induced shame and - above all - the realisation that you and you alone are the only thing that can change your behaviour. Ain't no higher powers involved. And if there are they've made it abundantly clear they give nary a toss about magicking away addictions.

One drink does not a drunk make. One bout of other drug use does not a binge make. One night of gambling does not a home be lost. It's perfectly natural that such things will happen when trying to change long-established patterns of behaviour and beating yourself up - with or without encouragement from other self-made whipping boys - doesn't help. So you slipped up and "lost control". So try not to do the same today. Really is as simple and as difficult as that.

/anti-12 Step rant

Don't give up giving up <3
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Wise words, hubs. :)

headfuck123 said:
vi think you should take a look at some buddhist teachings. they are not about worshiping gods or any of that shit but simply training your mind to be happy and balanced which only you yourself can do. external forces may be a catalyst to changing your lifestyle but essentially 90% of your problems come from how think about things.
Click to expand...

Several years ago I was looking into the Buddhist way of thinking, because to them, everything we need in life is already there. So many people go searching for external distractions (distractions from ourselves I guess), when oftentimes they already have everything they need right in front of them. There's this Buddhist proverb which says something along the lines of, "every human being is the author of his own health or disease", and I believe this. Unfortunately, we can't look or wait for someone else to save us, we have to be the ones to that for ourselves. And I hope you're able to do that. Fuck, I hope we all are. <3
 
Hey, I figure this is the best place to ask my question, as its about a benzo an' all.

Has anyone known Chlordiazepoxide 10mg to come in green round tablets, instead of the much more common capsules?

Never mind, a google search gave me the answer. They are what they claim to be.
 
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I'm meant to have an NA meeting tonight but don't see the point in going if I cant get into the rehab place for at least another month. I might aswell detox myself, and do it without NA but keep going to the groups at the recovery centre, I only have about 200mg of phenazepam left so it will all be gone before I get into the detox place so I might aswell taper myself fast as the doctors wont prescribe me anything. I'm gonna go to the local GP tomorrow and see about getting me on a diazepam script to taper from 60mg a day to 30mg a day which is the target they set for allowing me into the detox place as I've pretty much run out of my illegal benzos, I can guess what he will say though, a big fat no. Pisses me off.
 
^ I banned myself for another 6 months ago so it's not necessary to worry about. Was stupid playing again in the first place, at least I had the sense to send my dad £330 for him to save for me this month so I have a bit of savings in the bank of Dad.
 
I know that Etizolam isn't strictly a benzo but does anybody know that if I was to quit using black market diazepam & used Etizolam instead would doing that prevent benzo withdrawal?
 
It should do. Although it's much shorter acting than diaz so not sure if it would really help your situation. Generally you'd want longer acting benzos to taper. Is why you tend to get scripted diaz to come off other benzos. That's not use if you're coming of diaz though obviously. Etiz may be useful taken just to ward off the very worst of the w/ds though. Hopefully somebody here will have some experience of using etiz to help come of long acting benzos who will be more use.
 
ABE: Derp - must pay attention! ^ what Sham said, lol

maxalfie said:
I know that Etizolam isn't strictly a benzo but does anybody know that if I was to quit using black market diazepam & used Etizolam instead would doing that prevent benzo withdrawal?
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I think your issue, max, would be the relatively short-half life cf. diazepam. One reason why diazepam is usually used for tapering. So it would actually make more sense to use the diazepam you can source for a taper.

With Etiz, you'd drop in WDs faster and more often (essentially). Flubromazepam might be an option (much longer half-life than etiz).
 
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