Being a smaller guy

[Two06]

Seriously, assuming that you are a heterosexual male, I feel like you are brushing a lot of broad strokes about the tastes of heterosexual women in men. First of all, at least from personal experience, I've found that a girl's taste in men is a far more varied thing than a men's taste in women. Again, I'm just throwing that out there - I have no actual scientific evidence to give you, but at least concerning my friends and acquaintances, there have been guys that I find amazingly attractive that friends of mine would never consider touching, and vice versa.

Also, what world are you living in that guys are always looking to "throw you around"? Please, if you're the kind of meathead that is constantly thinking about how you would fair in a fight with the men around you, I am so far from interested.

Lastly, the friend of mine who weighs in at 135 and is 6' 0" has been working out for most of the year, because he knows he's slightly underweight. It just hasn't taken yet. As far as BMI goes, 137 and 6' 0" is right above the underweight limit. And seriously, being a lean guy in your teenage years and early twenties is not that uncommon - your metabolism has an annoying habit of slowing down after you stop growing.

I honestly didn't imagine that guys put this much thought into their body mass. Yeah, girls obsess about their body weight, but it's generally in the opposite direction.....>.>

What world is he living in you say? How about the real world. Apparently unbeknownst to you, males are always subconsciously or consciously sizing up their rivals, and size has a big impact on social dynamics.

The point you seem to be missing is the OP is feeling self-conscious about his size. Regardless of whether or not females would want to date men of his build, the fact is no woman wants a man that is not confident in himself.

And your friend thats been working out for a year and it hasn't "taken" yet? Maybe he could use a personal trainer or something because he seems to be doing it wrong.

 

[motherofearth]

I'm a heterosexual male, consider myself masculine, and I do not size up every male I see. When I was a teenager and fighting was more common, maybe yeah, but it was never a preoccupation or prerequisite for any normal situation.

Maybe I'm an exception, but I don't feel my male friends do this either.

 

[Two06]

It's a basic function of evolutionary psychology. Bigger stronger males get more mating rights. Look at the animal kingdom... This is still ingrained in our psyche, it's just not as noticeable anymore because of the social progression of our species. Obviously you're not going to consciously look at every guy you see and think about fighting him, unless you're a psycho or have been shooting up Testosterone. But in certain situations your subconscious mind is still linked to these ideals.

 

[thujone]

Two06 really clarified what I was alluding to, thanks man.

So yeah, the point is OP feels small. Why should he feel small? 5'8" is taller than most girls. It is not, however, taller than most guys and other guys are where the problem comes around to. I'm not trying to depict females with any broad brush strokes but I'm well aware that females fight psychological battles with one another and that's the same way it is with males. I surely don't preoccupy my time with sizing up men either; assessing a person's size and making a judgment of their stature is so elementary that it should be floating on the periphery of the subconscious where it doesn't interfere with the higher thought process. Nevertheless we all find ourselves in situations where we know instinctually that some of the actions we're taking aren't logical when it comes to our relationships with other humans. However it manifests itsself, it's just part of human nature as Two06 was saying. I'd love to call your bluff, sarcophagus.heels, but it's not possible right now. If you ever end up in a situation where your beau has to throw down to prevent the woman he loves getting a fist through the face, consider it called.

 

[motherofearth]

I'd love to call your bluff, sarcophagus.heels, but it's not possible right now. If you ever end up in a situation where your beau has to throw down to prevent the woman he loves getting a fist through the face, consider it called.

You'd "love" knowing a fellow human being and her boyfriend encountered physical peril? Because it would make you right? Cosmically, the universe would be more sound?

 

[jones-in_J]

I'm 6'0" and 150 to 160 pounds.

It doesn't bother me at all.

that's exactly the same as me

i have crohn's disease so it's impossible for me to put any weight on...whether i'm doing drugs and eating nothing or eat non stop and lift weights i remain same size

but fuck it you have to become comfortable with who you are it's something that I learned and something that you need to learn too OP!

 

[Serotonin101]

I understand how you feel OP. But I'm 5' 7" at 162 pounds and about 10% body fat. Definitely fill out your frame and your confidence will go up. But trust me, height isn't generally a factor. I've dated women taller than me, shorter, same height, heavier, thinner, etc. As someone else mentioned, it's about personality, confidence, humor, wit, and as cliche as it may sound, chemistry. Go to the "steroids" section of Bluelight and do some research on bulking (steroid use is of course optional, I don't use em though). Depending on body type and metabolism and work out routine, you can definitely throw on some pounds, just patience is the key. Also don't use opiates as they reduce the body's natural testosterone levels, stimulants hurt appetite and sleep patterns. Pretty much give up all REGULAR drug use/abuse if you want to get fit and big.

 

[wizekrak]

I understand how you feel OP. But I'm 5' 7" at 162 pounds and about 10% body fat. Definitely fill out your frame and your confidence will go up. But trust me, height isn't generally a factor. I've dated women taller than me, shorter, same height, heavier, thinner, etc. As someone else mentioned, it's about personality, confidence, humor, wit, and as cliche as it may sound, chemistry. Go to the "steroids" section of Bluelight and do some research on bulking (steroid use is of course optional, I don't use em though). Depending on body type and metabolism and work out routine, you can definitely throw on some pounds, just patience is the key. Also don't use opiates as they reduce the body's natural testosterone levels, stimulants hurt appetite and sleep patterns. Pretty much give up all REGULAR drug use/abuse if you want to get fit and big.

Definitely true!

I'm a skinny dude, always have been always will be, but for every body type there's pretty much a girl who will find it a turn on (within reason). It all comes down to how you carry yourself and personality. I've never thought I was a good looking, in fact I think I'm average at best. Skinny, receding hairline, average height, but every girl I've dated has thought I was hotshit. It comes down to working what you have and not giving a shit about what you don't have. Charm, sense of humour, intelligence, being fun, and making a girl feel happy about herself, secure, and content all go farther than raw physical attributes.

Honestly don't expect every girl to be digging your style, just as girls don't expect every guy to be digging theirs. Honestly, with the girls I've had the most fun with it was all based on chemistry. Within 5 minutes of talking to them I could tell if there was attraction present and whether things would progress.

I used to be really insecure when I was younger and worry that I was too ugly, or too thin, or too whatever. But the best thing I ever did was say "fuck it" and just be me and do what I want to do without worrying about those kinds of things. Granted it took me nearly 30 years of living to finally realize that, but since I did life has become just that much better.

 

[Llegs]

My korean bf is shorter then me when i were heels (a lot) but he likes having a tall pretty girl on his arm. not all girls are shallow. i went for personality 8)

 

[killermunchies]

What world is he living in you say? How about the real world. Apparently unbeknownst to you, males are always subconsciously or consciously sizing up their rivals, and size has a big impact on social dynamics.

The point you seem to be missing is the OP is feeling self-conscious about his size. Regardless of whether or not females would want to date men of his build, the fact is no woman wants a man that is not confident in himself.

And your friend thats been working out for a year and it hasn't "taken" yet? Maybe he could use a personal trainer or something because he seems to be doing it wrong.

It depends on what social scene you involve yourself in. The people that I associate with stopped thinking like that around 9th grade. Some people, however, like to walk around with a chip on their shoulder and size up everyone around them. To each their own I guess. I'm a normal sized guy and I don't go around sizing people up and picking fights. I've found that meat heads are just loud. It's the angry people that carry around guns that you have to worry about. While I agree confidence is important, there is more for people to be confident about than just their size. If the only thing you have going for you is the size of your muscles or height, that's not really true confidence.

 

[Noodle]

Men are not supposed to be thin, regardless of their height.

So says the animalistic and most base part of our physical assesments of others.

I'm more into bigger brains myself.