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As the rain drops.......

Jay Arel

Bluelighter
Joined
Feb 10, 2003
Messages
6
Location
Hazleton, PA
Would you stay if i fell to my knees and begged you to?
Because i won't, because i can't, because you want me to.
Because you know how i am, you know me all to well.
And you know i won't beg, i'll hold my dignity straight to hell.
I'm a firm believer in doing what will make you happy.
And your decision was made, it just didn't include me.
You said you need to find yourself, and reestablish a family.
But yet I'm the bad guy, because i responded incorrectly.
I won't call you and ask you not to leave.
I won't come to the bar and ask you to stay with me.
I won't let myself be destroyed by another girl.
And yes, that's what you are, i don't have feelings anymore.
I have no more heart, I've locked it straight down.
It's not there for you to fuck with, I'll never again let it out.
And i'll never again feel pain, i thank YOU for that.
You found where the pain lives, and broke it in half.
So forget, just let it, pack your things and leave.
Because it no longer matters, it won't affect me.
And yes, you're right, this is me being tough.
It's all i have left, and for me it's enough.
And if you were here right now, you could look up as the rain drops from the golden sky.
And in time, you would realize....
Those weren't raindrops, just tears from swollen eyes.
It's inside there somewhere the real truth lies.
 
you're one of those people who it seems like, no matter where we left off, we can always pick back up at the same conversation. that's what i always loved about you. so you think i would have some witty advice to give you, but i don't. i watched so many girls come and go in your life, and it seems like any advice i ever gave was just shit. i dont know what it is you're looking for in a girl these days... but i hope you find her. there is such a sadness in this poem... what kills me, is that i can relate. if i was where you are right now, i would put on a song for you and we'd laugh at how OBNOXIOUSLY UPBEAT it is...
"oh, i could hide 'neath the wing
of the bluebird as she sings
the six o'clock alarm would never ring...
but it rings, and i rise
wipe the sleep out of my eyes
my shaving razor's cold and it stings..."

you know the words. cheer up dammit.
 
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