^my husband and i also have separate accounts along with a joint account for paying bills. we are both financially independent. we have our own interests and my husband doesn't generally care what i do.
i am amazed at the anti-marriage sentiment on here. and the amount of negative comments claiming that i am somehow less of a woman for choosing to be married.
my husband and i got married after dating for ten years. we are happy and i don't really feel the need to defend my marriage to anyone. but i can assure you that i am independent and not constrained by my relationship. i don't feel like i am property nor do i feel like i was coerced into something.
This forum is a male-centric hive-mind.

I like to think I bring some feminine, black-sheep thoughts into it. I find that many people on here preach tolerance, but they belittle people who have tradition, harmless ethics. It irks me, really.
Nothing wrong with wanting and loving your marriage. I honestly think some people envy those who are truly happy regardless of which way they swing. You are lucky to have found someone who loves you. Not many people can say the same. Not many people are fortunate enough to be completely happy and content with their lives. It seems to be those people who are now the outcasts and belittled for their beliefs and happiness. That's a shame. I envy these types of people, but I certainly don't hate on them.
How can you promise to love someone forever?
You don't understand it, because you've never had it. There is nothing wrong with someone desiring it, chasing it, and hoping for it, and quite possibly finding it. Old people who are totally in love with each other for decades is one of the most awesome things in the world. My grandparents had it. My 70 year old grandfather used to tell my grandmother that she was the most beautiful woman in the world. He would tell me stories of when they met, and he would tell me what she was wearing, what she looked like, and what she was eating that day. He loved her for forever, and my grandmother was never the same after he died. They were married for 60 years.
Sure, that doesn't happen often, but I certainly never looked at her as a slave or stuck in some loveless commitment. Perhaps that doesn't happen often, but there is nothing wrong with someone searching for it.
Libby, you of all people should understand the bad in judging someone.