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Alcoholism Thread V. ti martwonies

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You can quit if you really want to D's , I drank daily for the last few years pretty much and i stopped. I have 10 days tonight and thats a really long time for me

Im feeling so much better. Sure the withdrawal sucked but now that its over Im in a much more stable mood. Drinking everyday will get you horribly depressed eventually and its just not worth the damage it does to your body and mind. If you can drink and not be a drunk I guess its fine for some people. My brain just isnt made that way , I'll drink until every last drop is gone and Im passed out. I'm gonna try and avoid alcohol for the rest of me life

I commend you on trying to quit D's it'll be hard but I'm sure you'll pull through :)<3
 
It's already hard dude, I've lost everything I worked for. It sucks being without a phone, or a car. I don't even want to think about where my car is. Anxiety is my biggest fear right now, I get so worried about everything. A drink would be damn good right now, holy shit. I gotta fight it, I gotta be strong. My family's giving me the tough love treatment and wow I've never felt more fucking suicidal in my life. :\
 
D's said:
It just sucks, the shakes the sweats the shits, holy shit, and I figured how the hell could a 21 year old become an alcoholic? Like at AA meetings I never see anyone my age, everyone's 40+. So how the hell did I become a alcoholic so young?
I could blame my family because everyone is a alcoholic, or I could blame the liquor store, hell I could even blame you. But it's time I start taking responsibility for my actions. It sucks, holy hell it sucks ass, but I gotta do it. I cant keep living like this in the shadows cut-off from the world.
I have to find out who I am, do I want to be Prisoner #240538532 or do I want to be Drew?
I gotta man up and do this. It's going to be hard, but it's going to be harder if I'm drunk.

I'm powerless over everything in my life. Now I just have to believe that the big man up stairs is going to not overwhelm me with decisions, and will guide me to the right path.
one second at a time.
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im not sure if alcoholism is a disease but it does seem hard wired in the brain from birth. do you live in an area where there are multiple meetings? have you tried NA, there seems to be a large amount of younger people in those meetings, just replace alcohol with drug, which it is and worse then most at that!

life in general drunk is more difficult, and draining/exhausting keeping up.

you admit you are powerless over alcohol, i know i am too, it has proven that to me most my life and i now accept it, and after some time feel much better and disturbed by the thought of drinking.

it sounds like you are putting a lot on your self at one time, its good to go a head and handle your biz, but take it slow and thiiink about your thoughts and actions, whats happening atm and how its best handled.

things will start to fall into place with out you even noticing after a while, as said it only gets easier with time, thats the only thing that can be promised with alcoholism, and drugs in general. alcoholics seem to need to pay close attention an be aware of that cleaver crafty tricky mind of ours not to fool our selves into have one.
 
this is hard, really hard, really really really hard. oh shit this is hard. I know getting sober isn't going to be easy, I'm all about that "Instant gratification". I don't know what to do, I want my parents to love me, and I just can't accept they are using "tough love" on me. I feel like they fucking hate me. So I fucked up, I totald a car, went to jail, cut myself. serously fucked up, and why did I do all this? because I'm a alocholic. I'm a addict, I'm deppresed, I'm alone, I'm a fucking basketcase of emotions.
I'm afraid to go to sleep tonight, I don't want those awful dreams about looseing my family members, I know it seems like they all fucking hate my guts, but I still love them, I'm going to love my family until the day I die.
Shits just extremly hard for me to grasp.

who fucking invented tough love that shits going to get someone killed.
 
Had one beer tonight, not too bad. Going to not have any tomorrow.

Hitting the gym really helps. I am just sick of drinking for several hours every night. Keep in mind I have been drinking at different levels for close to a decade....
 
D's: I can recommend Osho for you, if you want an easy way into spirituality. He was an indian guy (looked like a 60s guru, but don't let that turn you off), who taught western philosophy, but then turned to a more spiritual way. His texts are very easy to read, and they build on everything from existentialism to Buddhism. There's no dogma, and he is anti-organized religion.

http://www.oshoworld.com/onlinebooks/BookXMLMain.asp?BookName=darshan+diaries/a rose is a rose is a rose.txt

Just start reading, he doesn't advocate religion as such. It's about individual spiritualism. Just be prepared for some new age-talk (I ignore it and read the good bits).

If that doesn't tickle you, you could try buddhism. It's not a reiigion, but more of a life philosphy. One of the main ideas in buddhism is that excess leads to suffering. For an easy way into buddhism, check out wikipedias page on it, it is extensive.

Or this page:

http://www.thebigview.com/buddhism/fourtruths.html

Don't be turned off by the "life is suffering"-bit, it is more descriptive than it is prescriptive - meaning that buddhists do not have a pessimistisc view of life, they just try to see reality for what it is, and not what we hope it to be.
 
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phactor said:
Had one beer tonight, not too bad. Going to not have any tomorrow.

Hitting the gym really helps. I am just sick of drinking for several hours every night. Keep in mind I have been drinking at different levels for close to a decade....
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One beer is good. Given that you've decreased your use so much, do you actually feel one beer now!?! Good self-control keeping it at one.

I imagine you're probably gettin' pretty ripped by now, being in the gym everyday for a while and all...Feeling happier and more confident these days?

11 days for me.
 
^ Congrats on 11 days Redleader, that's really good going. Phactor- glad to see you doing so well too. Although I haven't posted in this thread much recently I love to read it and I empathise with so much of what's been said.
 
D's- Like trying to come off of anything the most important thing you can do is keep your mind occupied- Like OC suggested, listen to music, or go for a walk-
You could read a book or learn about something that interests you-
It is often said and blown off- the whole, pick up a hobby- bit, but it does help :)
 
ocean said:
It is often said and blown off- the whole, pick up a hobby- bit, but it does help :)
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QFT.

And I'll add: exercise.

If I've done an intense workout, really exhausted my energy stores and sweated about 5 litres of water out, the absolute LAST thing I want to do is drink alcohol.

Even if I persist and have a drink after such an exercise session, I get a horrible headache immediately and can't even finish one drink.

Works like a charm.
 
you know what, the beginning is the worst, but it really gets easier and easier. minute by minute, day two, day three, day four... you just have to hang on, know that there are going to be moments that feel soooo uncomfortable, but you just have to wait, wait till you get to the other side of that feeling.

hang in there d's, i hope you feel better really soon!
 
RedLeader said:
One beer is good. Given that you've decreased your use so much, do you actually feel one beer now!?! Good self-control keeping it at one.

I imagine you're probably gettin' pretty ripped by now, being in the gym everyday for a while and all...Feeling happier and more confident these days?

11 days for me.
Click to expand...

I actually do feel one... kinda crazy to think about. Also, I've noticed I often am able to wait/not crave either. Often times I will just be feel like its not worth it.

I got up and went to the gym BEFORE WORK... never thought I would pull that off. I think I was the youngest guy there at the time. I had the entire weight lifting area to myself.

But yes I am feeling much better (even though work is really bad, actually looking for another job right now). Confidence is through the roof. Really making an attempt to meet new people, I make friends easily and have a very good/friendly personality so that has never been a challenge.

Anyways, didn't have any tonight. My housemates are tanked right though lol.

Spurs - Hope you are doing well. BTW, I have been watching alot more European League matches lately. The sport is really starting to catch on over here.
 
Cool thanks for the advice, I'm still smoking weed pretty much all the time, I'm not drinking atleast. It's day 3 no drink, as little as it sounds shits starting to get scarier and scarier. Like relapse is inevitable. It's bound to happen, it's just when and who will i hurt this time.

one minute at a time rite?
 
Right...one minute at a time...don't think about when/if...think about the now and now you are sober.

You can do this man...3 days is a GREAT accomplishment!
 
I have to agree with Ryka.

D's try not to worry about "if/when" you might relapse. It happens to a lot of people but it doesn't HAVE to happen. There are some people who quit one day and never ever drink (or smoke, or shoot up, or whatever) again in their lives. So it's not necessarily inevitable.

Just continue to do the best you can, which is exactly what you've been doing <3
 
D's said:
Cool thanks for the advice, I'm still smoking weed pretty much all the time, I'm not drinking atleast. It's day 3 no drink, as little as it sounds shits starting to get scarier and scarier. Like relapse is inevitable. It's bound to happen, it's just when and who will i hurt this time.

one minute at a time rite?
Click to expand...

yeah, focus on the here and now, dont dwell on the past -than can send you to a bad place- and dont worry about tomorrow or the next day, they will come ;) change the things you can, and accept the things you can not.

i take you being scared as being serious, these first few days are the worst. yes, it seems like for ever but, the next 2-3 days will be better and better. dont let go of the work youve done so far!
 
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