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Alcoholism Thread v. A sober life is a good life <3

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n3ophy7e said:
^^ phactor, what's 90 in 90? (pardon my ignorance)



Yep I'm the same mate. "Functional" alcoholic. It's good because I never get myself in to any trouble from being drunk, and no-one has any idea that I have a drinking problem. Except for my partner and my parents, who I specifically told about my drinking, and it quite shocked them because they really had no idea.
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90 meetings in 90 days Good idea keeps your mind from wandering and keeps you busy !
 
lowrider6967 said:
90 meetings in 90 days Good idea keeps your mind from wandering and keeps you busy !
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I did something like 200 in 90. It's what I needed at the time to keep myself focused and to get through that initial mental part of withdrawal. Call me thick headed, I guess, but I needed to constantly hear that I could get through the next second, minute, hour, day without alcohol. Otherwise, my mind would have led me to do what I knew best, which was to pick up a drink.
 
90 in 90 or more will work well for some people. i think in some areas, some of the time, it can become an indiscriminate prescription for nearly every newcomer, to the detriment of some and the benefit of others.

I can not claim to know AA/NA culture in more than a couple regions. I do believe even for people that the 12 step programs work well for there can be a level of involvement that is too much and counterproductive. Easy does it.
 
Like I said the 90 in 90 is something I decided to do. I'm going to stick with it. I am back in Chicago where the meetings are much much much better.

Day 78 for me. I need to find a damn job, other then that I am doing good. I am in this monitoring program (all of this is voluntary for me) but I may stop it. 75 dollars per fucking drug test is too much.
 
I decided not to count the days since I last had alcohol since I figured that would just make me think of it more.

However, I know it's around the 2 week mark now and I feel so much better for not having that crap circulating around my veins :D:D:D:D
 
wooger said:
I decided not to count the days since I last had alcohol since I figured that would just make me think of it more.

However, I know it's around the 2 week mark now and I feel so much better for not having that crap circulating around my veins :D:D:D:D
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I don't count either. At best I have a general idea and for me that's good enough.
 
About 60 hours off alcohol, and I'm feeling better but just in a crappy mood. However I am looking forward to school in 11 days and I'm pretty stoked to go back to college. :)
 
I feel you on being in a crappy mood without alcohol. I'm exactly a month and a day off, and struggling a bit, but more than that, I'm a much pissier motherfucker now. I bet it'll go away though, stick with it, and be careful in college- i know how hard it is sometimes to get away from the drinking scene at school.
 
If I don't have beer stocked away and I'm broke, I get fucking angry and irritable. I don't want to be, but I am. I try to contain it when people are around, so that I don't throw a fit at a person that doesn't deserve it. But no one is home now, and I've got less than half of one beer left. I have no money, as FUCKING USUAL. I'm just losing my shit.
 
Friend of mine came over with a few bourbons yesterday. A few turned into quite a few. I feel better this morning than I have any right to given the amount that we drank. It's strange how different being drunk felt after all this time - not something I'm in any hurry to repeat.
 
82 days for me! I cannot believe it. :D

Things are going pretty good for me right now. Back in Chicago were the meetings are great. So many different options. I sit in rooms with all sorts of people. Doesn't matter color, gender, religion, sexual preference. If you want to get clean then I will talk to you. In my hometown, I did once see a guy with a White Supremacist tattoo and avoided him though, but according to the rules he had a right to be there. Still wanted to punch him in the face though.

I am leading my recovery communities meeting tonight. I love giving leads. I am the youngest member in my community yet I lead the meetings lol.

Anyways we do have a very difficult person that checked in. The guy is so angry that he makes me uncomfortable to be around. Thankfully he was moved out of my room. Reminds me of where I was at when I came in. I wasn't angry, but I was hyper as shit and could not sit still for a minute.
 
its been about 5 days off alcohol now, i feel horribly depressed. I have zoloft prescribed to me by my doctor for post detox depression but I don't feel like taking them. Last time I took the ssri's and when I tapered off them, I went back to drinking due to quitting anti-depressants.

I'm not about to go to the store and get a 40oz as I do not want to go through withdrawals again. The insomnia is really annoying and I hate having REM rebound sleep or having those nightmares of falling and waking up suddenly.

Good luck to everyone else that is quitting and maintaining sobriety. I've been struggling for a year to quit, only to relapse after a week of sobriety by first having a few, and then back to the same old routine.
 
chompy said:
its been about 5 days off alcohol now, i feel horribly depressed. I have zoloft prescribed to me by my doctor for post detox depression but I don't feel like taking them. Last time I took the ssri's and when I tapered off them, I went back to drinking due to quitting anti-depressants.

I'm not about to go to the store and get a 40oz as I do not want to go through withdrawals again. The insomnia is really annoying and I hate having REM rebound sleep or having those nightmares of falling and waking up suddenly.

Good luck to everyone else that is quitting and maintaining sobriety. I've been struggling for a year to quit, only to relapse after a week of sobriety by first having a few, and then back to the same old routine.
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Sounds like you need outside help. Think about going to a meeting or getting into an outpatient program. I could never stay sober for more then a week or two. Yet, I continued to try for years and years.

Anyways I am doing really good. Getting ready to go to the gym. I do need to talk about one thing.

There is an older guy that checked into my program about 6 days ago. He is walking around fucking enraged. He makes everyone very uncomfortable around him due to the energy he is putting off. It is very hard to explain. The guy is constantly grinding and clenching his teeth and swearing. He is a fucking mess. All he does is complain all day and then isolate himself from the community. He was placed in my apartment and I asked for him to be removed within 8 hours. My program is a trust based program and we are given alot of freedom. This is why it works so well for me. I did not trust this guy for a minute

Turns out that he is not attending meetings and is lying about going. He is getting called out today.

His daughter is paying for his recovery. The guy is a very successful businessman with lots of money, but would not pay for his own program. What a piece of shit. He brings his daughters to the community dinner yesterday and puts on a little show for them. He is in major denial and does not want to be here. He constantly trys to point out how he is better then all the other people and makes snide ass comments like "they are drug addicts, watch out they steal from you". I want to say "He is an enraged alcoholic... watch out he beats his wife and children". But I am above that shit.

This guy is placing other peoples sobriety at risk. Like I said, you can feel what he is putting out there and its not good. Some people are so fucking selfish (I was at one time as well). He is more concerned with the Green Bay Packers then recovery. He keeps saying "If I leave the staff will just guilt me". What he really means is "If I leave then my daughters will continue to guilt me".

The guy knows his drinking is bad, yet he wants to keep doing it. This is suicidal behavior. I was there once. I wasn't angry like he was and I wanted to stop... but I knew I had a major substance abuse issue and I continued to do it.
 
Stressed in a big way about money but perhaps a little on the delusional side about life in general. Definitely a time for caution.
 
So I hadn't planned on drinking tonight...first night in god knows how long I wouldn't have had any booze.

I resisted heading to the liquor store...until all the ones around here were closed and I had to ride the subway across town to one that was open late...

I can't remember the last night I didn't drink, the cravings don't seem to affect me until it gets late and I don't get tired, and I know that without a few drinks sleep is out of the question. Though who can have just a few drinks? Not this guy. Maybe I could sleep without it, I don't know, I haven't really given it a chance.

I've got to be at work in 7 and a half hours, and I know I'm going to have a hangover but I just can't seem to give a shit, I'm used to it. I feel good for now. I've done my job on no sleep still high as shit, so something tells me I'll be fine.

I don't know what I'm trying to contribute here, I'm obviously not about to quit any time soon, in a way I envy those that do, but I can't see myself doing it. I'm a definite polydrug abuser, no opiates or benzos though, not with any regularity, I don't want to go down that path. For me though, I could quit everything else, but I could never quit alcohol. It calms me down and makes me feel like a normal human being, and even better, puts me to bed at night. I could stop tripping, stop rolling, but a lot of the time I feel like I can only relax chemically.

Thanks for reading.
 
Lolie said:
Friend of mine came over with a few bourbons yesterday. A few turned into quite a few. I feel better this morning than I have any right to given the amount that we drank. It's strange how different being drunk felt after all this time - not something I'm in any hurry to repeat.
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Lolie you've probably already mentioned this somewhere, in which case I apologise, but how long had you been sober for before the aforementioned evening?
 
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