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alcoholism thread [merged]

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It's not really a matter of "enduring pain." It's actually quite liberating.

Google suspension teams for more info. It's been a Native American custom for millenia, most of the time its 4 points on your back and your suspended with pullies off the ground (haven't done that yet). Again, just a digression since you asked.

Let's bring this thread back on topic, because it's one of the more important support discussions we have on this site.
 
Well finally I have found the BL thread with my name all over it.
I am an alcoholic, it runs in my family. I have not had one alcohol-free day for a couple of years, EXCEPT when I had to get a pregnancy terminated because I'd been binge-drinking every night while I'd been (unbeknownst of course) pregnant. It was a real wake-up call because of course I had to come clean to my doctor about how much me and my partner had been drinking. After that we managed to go for a long stint of not drinking on week-nights at ALL, probably for around 4 months? This was pretty monumental for me, because as I said, I had previously gotten drunk every single night of more than half of my adult life (about 3-4 years)
In the last month or so, I have started drinking every night again. My partner doesn't know because I've been hiding it from him. He's still staying strong and not drinking through the week, so I feel guilty for betraying him. But my body needs the alcohol, and once it's in there and I feel the relief of satisfying the craving, I don't really care that I'm drinking behind his back.
Pretty shit though huh.
On the weekend I pretty much just drank solidly the whole time, even in the mornings, while my partner was at work. I didn't hide it from him though because we're allowed to drink on weekends. I'm actually having to take a sick day off work today because I've got a throat infection from drinking so much. And this morning I promised myself that I wouldn't drink through the week anymore, but I'm already craving alcohol and I know that by the end of the day I will have had something to drink.
The thing is, I'm not yet at a stage where I NEED to quit. And I don't necessarily WANT to quit either. I don't get aggressive when I drink, I don't ever black-out from drinking too much, I never throw up from drinking too much, I never drink-drive, etc etc. The only incentive to quit is that I'm gaining heaps of weight from drinking, and have lost the motivation to exercise.
 
n3ophy7e said:
The thing is, I'm not yet at a stage where I NEED to quit. And I don't necessarily WANT to quit either. I don't get aggressive when I drink, I don't ever black-out from drinking too much, I never throw up from drinking too much, I never drink-drive, etc etc. The only incentive to quit is that I'm gaining heaps of weight from drinking, and have lost the motivation to exercise.
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Welcome to the thread.

So do you see your situation as problematic to a degree or not at all? What will happen if you continue to drink like this - will it plateau, or will it get worse?

Another thing, I've always found it weird how some people gain alot of weight from drinking while others don't. You guys think it's genetic, or a case of eating unhealthy? I know I sure ate like a racoon when I was drinking.
 
BlackOut said:
Welcome to the thread.

So do you see your situation as problematic to a degree or not at all? What will happen if you continue to drink like this - will it plateau, or will it get worse?

Another thing, I've always found it weird how some people gain alot of weight from drinking while others don't. You guys think it's genetic, or a case of eating unhealthy? I know I sure ate like a racoon when I was drinking.
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Hi BlackOut :)

Yes I certainly do see it as problematic because I know alcoholism is in my genes, so there's no escaping it. And the longer I indulge it, the worse it will get. I want to have kids soon so it is going to have to end within the next year or so, so I have to come to terms with it soon don't I!

By the way, just as I predicted, I have indeed had a few drinks today.
Alcoholism ahoy!

As for the weight gain, personally, if I don't exercise (even if I have a good diet, with lots of fresh fruit and vegies, and little to no processed carbs or sugar) I gain weight. So, when I'm drunk I can't/am not bothered to exercise, thus I gain weight.

I have, anecdotally, heard of people losing weight when they continually binge-drink, and this has been (from what I've seen) linked to the people who drink spirits mainly, e.g. vodka etc.

If, however, the person is drinking mainly beer and sugary alcoholic drinks, e.g. white wine, sparkling wine, mixers etc, they will probably gain weight.

Also, I think the food aspect has a LOT to do with it too. If you're binge-drinking on an empty stomach, you will get nauseous quite quickly, so you need to eat. And you more than likely will crave carbs!
 
alcoholism is shit, my mum is a recovering alcoholic. the worst thing is the constant denial.
 
Did anybody else use benzos to quit drinking? (Only those perscribed.)
I mean to help for the withdrawls, it helps guys.
 
Keepgoingup said:
Did anybody else use benzos to quit drinking? (Only those perscribed.)
I mean to help for the withdrawls, it helps guys.
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I would still be drinking if it wasn't for benzos. They are invaluable if you want to curb your drinking.
 
I am now using zero benzos

But mentally I am addicted to both, benzos and alcohol

or what is this constant anxiety?
 
never had a benzo in my life
but i never could quit one thing without another, save a few life-threatening scares [that fade soon enough like anything else]

i am really hurting tonite, ouch .. its not usually this bad :(
but it's only tuesday .. and already too late to get loaded.
 
It's tough. I know, man. I can't really offer advice as to taper etc, that doesn't work.

Cold turkey or go home. You need a detox center. Get one. It's a treatable, yet fatal illness.
 
It seems like a lot of people here have throttled down a hard liquor habbit by switching to a few beers everynight. Mee too.

Ive done the same but is anyone concerned about getting a beer gut ?

Ive been downing alot of Peroni Beer over the past few weeks and my pants are already feeling tighter and i can feel the bulge comming.

Seriously fuck this, i try to be good and this is what i get.

Looks like im back to Hennessey. Will be carefully rationing it out this time round.
 
:) its been a few weeks sinci iv had a drink now i think, not that im an alcholoc but the chick im livin wit @ the moment is an is on her *th or 9th day sober, doin all the right shit, goin to AA, she 2 is on a benzo holiday right now coz of that, so yeah thats y i not been on it, im really proud of what she's doin so the best thing i could do was joining her in not indulgeing... shame though a beer will double the strength of tha ol meds, just depends what im takin on that pitcular day.. will have 2 live with grapefruit... mmmmm grapefruit=D
 
time traveler said:
Ive done the same but is anyone concerned about getting a beer gut ?
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I have that already. I have a muscular build from my gym hobby , but I have huge fat deposit in my stomach

I am a bit overweight (5'11" 206 lbs) , it isn't smart to bulk with food and drink alcohol at the same time
 
ì just spent 3 months in a ward recovering from a pretty long psychotic episode due to cutting the drink and my subutex treatment in one go life seems so dull when your sober but in fact its more interesting more spread out.
 
Madmike said:
I am now using zero benzos

But mentally I am addicted to both, benzos and alcohol

or what is this constant anxiety?
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In my personal case, anxiety and alcoholism went hand in hand. Shit, I don't even like getting drunk, one beer does fuckall for me. I drank to make the negative thought patterns in my head cease, or in the ver least change their course. This of course is an endless cycle, for you'll wake up the next morning feeling worse off than you orginally started, thus repeating the process.

Currently I take phenibut on a cycle (take a week off at most times), and take valium sparsely (5mg every other day or so, until I run out I suppose). I've also just starting using a few choice psychedelics to gain some introspection on this past year I spent boozing away in the gutter.

Another note, google "piracetam," It's supposedly applicable to alcoholism treatment and is an all around great supplement to get your mind going again. Definitly helped me out, but of course that's subjective and shouldn't be taken as a factual documented statement. :)
 
I tried

I swear that I honestly tried to cut back on drinking when I got out of jail. I had one of my cell-mates pick me up, he brought me a 32 ounce Budweiser, and I had another that night before I went to sleep. I got back together with my girlfriend the day after, and I didn't drink but 2 beers. I even asked her if it was alright. The St Patrick's day parade was where I fucked up. I got fucked up and pegged a cop car in the parade with a beer bottle. I was left behind, and when my girlfriend called I was a dick...and she left me.

After that, I realized that I lost something great and jeopardized my freedom. I didn't drink anything for 2 and a half days. Then, I got a ride from my father to go pay my court fines. He saw a biker bar on the way there and decided it would be fun to have a couple of beers in a biker bar. I immediately got so anxious. I'd done good for 2 and a half days. I was hoping to god that my father would forget about the bar on the way back, but he didn't. I didn't want to admit to my father that I had a drinking problem, so I didn't say anything. When the waitress asked me what I wanted, I hesitated...then said "one budweiser"

I haven't been able to stop drinking for more than a few hours since then.
 
^
alcohol is a prison in its own right


im trying not to drink because i got psychotic when i stopped

scary stuff never thought i could go really crazy while being sober
 
Animal Mother said:
I swear that I honestly tried to cut back on drinking when I got out of jail. I had one of my cell-mates pick me up, he brought me a 32 ounce Budweiser, and I had another that night before I went to sleep. I got back together with my girlfriend the day after, and I didn't drink but 2 beers. I even asked her if it was alright. The St Patrick's day parade was where I fucked up. I got fucked up and pegged a cop car in the parade with a beer bottle. I was left behind, and when my girlfriend called I was a dick...and she left me.

After that, I realized that I lost something great and jeopardized my freedom. I didn't drink anything for 2 and a half days. Then, I got a ride from my father to go pay my court fines. He saw a biker bar on the way there and decided it would be fun to have a couple of beers in a biker bar. I immediately got so anxious. I'd done good for 2 and a half days. I was hoping to god that my father would forget about the bar on the way back, but he didn't. I didn't want to admit to my father that I had a drinking problem, so I didn't say anything. When the waitress asked me what I wanted, I hesitated...then said "one budweiser"

I haven't been able to stop drinking for more than a few hours since then.
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I can totally relate to this. I think if you've had a habit in the recent past then simply being in certain situations in which you always used to drink can trigger mild wd-like symptoms. Last Saturday I was on a train full of people drinking, and I started to shake and feel very anxious until I bought a beer myself. I felt fine before I got on, so it can only be that. I think there is even a scientific explanation for this; your body is preparing itself for the alcohol it believes will be forthcoming and therefore the excitory nervous system response kicks in even though you are sobre and have been for a while.

These lyrics by Weezer's 'Say it ain't so' come to my mind:
Somebody's heine is drowning my ice box
Somebody's cold one is giving me chills
Guess I'll just close my eyes

In addition to this, a couple of times when I have been asked what I want to drink I have involuntary asked for something alcoholic without making the conscious decision to. I was literally surprised to hear the words coming out of my mouth.

My drinking is not going too badly at the moment. I am aiming to cut back for a while, so that I can then drink without getting such bad wd's. I've only drank three times in the last month, and the last two times I didn't get drunk and kept below the 10 pint mark. That's good going for me...and I must say I feel much better for it.

But I like to keep benzos on hand for those times when I'm not drinking and everyone else is, just in case I get anxious. Even then it's a fucker refusing a drink, but it gets easier the more you do it. The problem is, you can say no but you can't mean it. To me, it feels like a fundamental denial of...some part of myself to refuse a drink when I am craving one.
 
I guess I am somewhat of an alcoholic. When I buy a bottle of liquor, I will drink heavily every night I have it, until its gone. I drink by myself like that a lot. When my buddies are over and we are splitting a case or a bottle of liquor, I always drink waay more than they do. Partially because they are lightweights, but mostly 'cause I drink to get drunk and they drink to socialize (like normal people).

Usually, I'll drink a lot, eat a pileo of some nasty ass food, then drink some more and pass out. A lot of the times though, drinking gives me insomnia, which makes for some horrible mornings. And yes, I drink malt liquor even though I know it's straight rot-gut. I drank three 40 oz one time (may not seem like much, but if you drink the stuff, you know it is). I downed damn-near a whole box of wine one night. Drank it straigtout of the tap of the bag. I can drink a case of Bud Light in a night, usually minus 2-4 beers.

This has all slowed down a lot in the past year and a half b/c of my girlfriend. We have absolutely amazing sex when I don't drink. A lot of times though, we'll do it and she'll pass out instantly, then I start drinkin. I find myself drinking a 24 in the afternoon or evening, and quitting after that. A good woman is an amazing thing for an alcoholic, I can't stress that enough. She never puts me down for drinking, but we both understand that everything is so much better when I don't get shit faced.
 
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