Recovery 8thday done with Poppyseed Tea/Wash! Week of Hell!

[Iceman1216]

Great news girl!!!
Hope all your trips have safe travel, and enjoyment !!
I am 10 days Clean
Still cant sleep ( such a PIA) but manageable
My sponcer says No has died from lack of sleep
Opiate abusers die all the time

 

[8thday]

Great news girl!!!
Hope all your trips have safe travel, and enjoyment !!
I am 10 days Clean
Still cant sleep ( such a PIA) but manageable
My sponcer says No has died from lack of sleep
Opiate abusers die all the time

How is it going? How are you feeling. The lack of sleep and anxiety/depression is horrific!!! Give me an update!!!

 

[8thday]

Good for you 8thday!! It's great to get through acute withdrawal. Holy shit is it great. Like Chris said, it's a high within itself.

Gabapentin continues to work for me, as far as not living in a constant state of severe anxiety, having panic attacks and racing thoughts.

I still feel all of the above, just not constantly and as intensely as I did before being on them.

I promise, opiates stop working. Morphine and IV heroin weren't effective for my anxiety toward the end. Can you imagine?! A 5 bag shot of heroin and 300mg of morphine and I still had anxiety and panic attacks.

When you settle down some more, it's really worth looking into mental and emotional issues, and finding solutions

I can tell you with certainty, that I would be a full-blown opiate/heroin addict if not for Neurontin (gabapentin). It was unbearable to be in my skin before that.

Yeah...I live on ibuprofen. My back, ankles, feet. I could definitely feel alot if stuff that was masked. You're still re,-balancing. You've done so well! I'm so proud of you 8thday. You are a strong woman!!! Let's hear it for the girls! Hive five. ❤

I took Gabapentin last night and actually slept, so Im feeling good today! It does help with my anxiety too, but after a couple of days, I don't feel like it is working anymore and I read that the dependance grows quickly with Gabapentin, so I am taking it when I am really needing it. I am so glad it works for you. My body must adjust to meds and need more.

How is your husband? How are you dealing with everything? You sure are a wonderful cheerleader to all on here. We all need you, so thank you!

 

[Iceman1216]

How is it going? How are you feeling. The lack of sleep and anxiety/depression is horrific!!! Give me an update!!!

Manageable
The not sleeping suckS!!
I have Ambian CR which help a Ton ( I can get sleep evey 4-5 days) when i talk them. I do not want another problem after opiates
I also do Aleve PM
and Night Rest with Melatonin ( really nice some times)
I am also on Lexapro
Had been with opiates as well

 

[8thday]

Congrats on the 49 days! Thats awesome! Its an amazing feeling not being sick anymore from the WD's. Its almost a 'high' in itself lol

Keep up the good work! It definitely isn't easy by any means.

Im on my 9th day and everything is back to normal, thankfully. I have some depression/cravings now and again but thats getting better each day (its probably because of stress from work).

Anyways, congrats again!

CHRIS, How are you? How many days are you now? I can't believe you were back to normal on day 9. I was not getting any sleep and still having water come out of me...TMI, but wow, was I sick. I hope it is still a good recovery for you and you are doing better. Keep me posted.

 

[Iceman1216]

good luck girl
with your Mom
I just took my mom to Fla for a funeral, and we had separate room (y)

I am 13 days clean, but having a very rough day, mentally and physically!
i need to travel over three hour in to the city due to health issues with a loved one. As well as sholder neck and back issues flaring up from radiation treatment side effects .

This whole thing sucks.
I have never taken more than my script was for and never ran out before hand, but I am Dependent on these things and stopping is No fun!!
getting better Sloooooooooooooooooowly

 

[Iceman1216]

8th Day, Happy Mothers day ?, to someone who does it right!!
Hope this finds you well. I am back to day one again. Small dose 10-20 mg of norco once a day or every two or three. I just cant seem yo get off for any long term ( most has been two weeks, then pain in neck, shoulder and back ) just could not work ..
all the best

 

[Stargazer]

I'm so happy for you 8thday. Well done lady. Getting to day 68 is beyond amazing. I know you didn't/couldn't believe it would get better, but it does.

Yeah, that kick of ambition from opiates is great. But, my God, all of the problems that accompany it!! Too many.

You no longer have to live in fear of withdrawal. That's a huge comfort.

Things will get better and better. You'll make sure of it. Much love to you. I'm so proud of you for hanging in there. ?

 

[Chris42393]

CHRIS, How are you? How many days are you now? I can't believe you were back to normal on day 9. I was not getting any sleep and still having water come out of me...TMI, but wow, was I sick. I hope it is still a good recovery for you and you are doing better. Keep me posted.

Hey there! Im not doing to great at the moment (im back on day 1...) lol Im not sure if you seen a post I had awhile ago about my relaspe because of something I seen at work... but I just stopped again from that relapse, so im withdrawaling now.. So im not doing to hot at the moment lol Im on hour 26 of the withdrawal.

I hope you're doing better than me! I finally got another computer, I accidently dropped my old one and it broke completely lol... Ill be able to post again!

 

[Iceman1216]

8th day how goes it ?

 

[Stargazer]

Hi there Iceman ?. Hope you're enjoying your vacation with your lovely wife.

Thinking of you 8thday. How are you girl?

 

[Iceman1216]

Thanks Star,
Was very nice to get away, to a beautiful tropical Island yes. The sad part was it Rained the whole trip!!!
Went to an Island that only get 14 days of rain a year and we got 7 !!!
has anyone heard from 8th Days???
I miss her and hope she is well??
I reread her posts, and what a trip it has been for her.

 

[Iceman1216]

Hi Chris, Happy memorial Day . Are you a Vet
All is well here. I am still taking my Norco and fortuitously, my dose has increased to 30 mg a day from 20 or 10!!!
i am going today to start a taper and Head the other way. I have just not been able to get through all the physical and mental thing happening in my life at the moment , to really get off them

 

[stormcharger]

Just fyi for anyone else wanting to get off poppy seed tea. When I stopped once I had access to a bunch of 100mg extended release tramadol. I did my research and saw it can be used to taper off other opiates. I used them in decreasing fashion over the first 2 weeks, not taking them on weekends just on weekdays when I had to work.

They can be good just to have one if you really need sleep. The important thing is to be careful and not develop a dependence on them as well. Its worth looking into as I have found tons of people get prescribed them and don't take them, making it extremely easy to acquire.

 

[8thday]

Hey there! Im not doing to great at the moment (im back on day 1...) lol Im not sure if you seen a post I had awhile ago about my relaspe because of something I seen at work... but I just stopped again from that relapse, so im withdrawaling now.. So im not doing to hot at the moment lol Im on hour 26 of the withdrawal.

I hope you're doing better than me! I finally got another computer, I accidently dropped my old one and it broke completely lol... Ill be able to post again!

Chris, I read your incredible work post. I cannot imagine what you see on a daily basis. It is wonderful we have people like you that can do what you do and see what you see. I hope you are getting some relief from the trauma you see every day. Really, so grateful that people like you can serve everyone when they need it most. That story still haunts me and I didn't see it, only read about your experience.

 

[8thday]

Hi there Iceman ?. Hope you're enjoying your vacation with your lovely wife.

Thinking of you 8thday. How are you girl?

I need to read up on your blog and see how you are doing. Thanks for always being so wonderful and checking up on me. Feeling a bit down on myself. No surprise. I am struggling.

 

[lovemissile66]

wow. I have been following your posts. It just never lets up, does it? How much insanity does a person have to take? I totally get the insomnia thing. If it wasn't for the total lack of sleep, then I think
kicking opiates would almost be doable. The last detox I went through, I was up 3 days. Not a frigging blink of sleep. That nearly broke me. And to read that you endured two months of insomnia??!
Well, here I am, detoxing again. Nothing but Clonidine. I was desperate yesterday and got 6 5mg methadone pills. Barely touched it. So, a setback, but hopefully not too bad. My thoughts are with
you 8thday.

 

[Chris42393]

Not great! I am embarrassed to say that I am about day 80 something and this last week, I have had a bit of a relapse!!! What the hell am I doing???? I never thought I would touch the stuff again. I had a stash of pills from old surgeries that I should have thrown away. I was having a bad week last week. I had a million things to get done andZERO desire to even move. I have always had depression and anxiety and I am taking Wellbutrin and a SSRI and it kind of helps but not really. I still don't want to go anywhere or do anything. I hate that this is my norm. I really loved taking a pain pill and feeling like I was fine to get things done that needed to get done. I have been self talking myself to death to try to motivate myself. Why does my brain not produce dopamine??? I took a half of a pain pill about every day last week and am up to a pill a day. I keep telling myself that I won't take it tomorrow and I do because I have the pills available to take and I just want to feel motivated to do something. I had a bunch of people over for Memorial Day yesterday and had to cook and clean all day and then I needed to get my mom and go to my dad's grave last night and I just didn't want to do any of it. I wanted to lay in bed and not talk to anyone. I know....it is depression, but I am taking meds and still have depression, anxiety and the ONLY thing that helps me is dopamine. I am not sure what to do. I wasn't going to take one today but I already took some because I have laundry and a dirty house and dinner to get going and I don't want to do any of it. I hate who I am. I hate that I am addicted and my body craves that crap! Will I ever get better? I feel like such a loser. I am not like most of the people on here that actually have chronic pain and actually need the medication just to function. I take it so I can get rid of depression. I haven't had any traumatic things to deal with in my life. I am not dealing with horrible stress like some people do that are on here or have had cancer and can't function because of pain. I don't know what to do. I am taking a half or a whole pill a day, but it feels good to feel this way again. I am feeling horribly guilty and didn't want to admit it to anyone, but I know all of you on here won't judge me. I know my husband would be horribly disappointed. All I want to do is take the PoppySeed Tea again, but I NEVER want to go through two months of insomnia again and that will probably keep me from purchasing more. I should have thrown the pills out like I did the poppyseed tea when I was going through withdrawals, I guess I am like an alcoholic and should not have alcohol in the house. I can't have pain meds in my house or I will eventually be too tempted to take them.
Iceman, I love that you care enough to check on me and ask how I am. Really, it means a lot. I have got on here to look, but have been too embarrassed to post. Feeling so down on myself. Will I ever be free of this?

Its okay! Thats part of recovery! I thought the same thing too, about my brain not making enough dopamine. Everytime I used, my depression went away and my introvertedness disappeared completely. I felt "normal" when I used. Im the same way with kratom too. Im started to decrease my dose, but I just keep telling myself, Ill stop tomorrow. Ill be fine. But of course, it never happens. I figured ill try immodium and see if that helps. If it does, ill throw away all my stuff. Cant really abuse immodium (or atlease id never do so). Wishing you the best!

 

[Chris42393]

Hi Chris, Happy memorial Day . Are you a Vet
All is well here. I am still taking my Norco and fortuitously, my dose has increased to 30 mg a day from 20 or 10!!!
i am going today to start a taper and Head the other way. I have just not been able to get through all the physical and mental thing happening in my life at the moment , to really get off them

Happy late Memorial Day! I did join the military, but 5 months in I started seizures and got kicked out... So not really LOL and I totally understand about the "physical and mental" things happening... Thats why it was so hard for me to stop as well. You can do it! Hope you're doing well!

 

[Iceman1216]

8th day; PLEASE BE EASY ON YOURSELF!!!
Wow it must be hard being you ???
We all have the disease of addiction, and our wiring is to crave more of everything that makes us feel better. I would guess that you do produce Dopamine, just not enough for how much you have going on.
we are not bad people getting Good, we are sick people getting Well !!!
you are an Amazing women in all aspects of the title!! Relax, set some lower boundaries for yourself. Do you meditate ??? there is a Great app for your phone called "Insight Timer" that is free and wonderful for guided meditations. You can do them anywhere for a few minutes to over an hour.