Safe To Roll?

[Mac98]

Ya, dude!!!! I TOTALLY love that song. I remember at a rave I threw at my cottage with some pretty close friends in April... it was maybe my 2nd time doing MDMA, we had lasers, a fog machine, black lights and a corner filled with mattresses...

When "Heavyweight" by Infected Mushroom came on (I was new to IM at the time) I remember closing my eyes and losing all grasp on reality. I became the song. I was one with it and it was perhaps one of the most humbling and beautiful experiences I've ever had in my life. Better than my first blowjob!! It was divine. When the song ended... I had this incredible sense of satisfaction like I had accomplished something meaningful in my life...

Because of this experience, I now swear by Infected Mushroom. They changed my life. They made me live incredible (and that's putting it lightly) moments in my life and I am forever grateful!

I didn't meet the whole band, though. Had I, I would've been WAY to high to control myself and would have asked them a million questions in the first 2 minutes and probably gotten dragged away by bouncers lollllll. But the guitarist (Tom Cunningham) was a class act. Signed autographs for everyone, was smiling, super polite, even gave this one chick a hug and I shook his hand, thanked him for the night and told him he and the rest of the band were a huge inspiration! Anyways... I'm blabbing. I've been sober for the past 20 years of my life... now that I'm indulgeing a bit, I find myself marvelling at the hidden gems that life has to offer.

Humbling

And when I have enough money, I too will be getting a tattoo representing my raver days . Cuz I sure as hell will never forget such a turning point in my life.

I like this discussion! lollllll

 

[xburtonchic]

I don't even have to roll for Arabian Nights on Mescaline to have that effect on me haha. Their music is just crazy amazing. Well, I've never come out of the song feeling like I accomplished something meaningful, but I do feel a bit more... positive?... i guess, after I listen to it lol if that makes sense.

I have to admit though, that song is a hundred times better when it's listened to while you're riding an opiate high. Those days are long gone for me, but it's all good. I still remember what it felt like

 

[Mac98]

I don't even have to roll for Arabian Nights on Mescaline to have that effect on me haha. Their music is just crazy amazing. Well, I've never come out of the song feeling like I accomplished something meaningful, but I do feel a bit more... positive?... i guess, after I listen to it lol if that makes sense.

I have to admit though, that song is a hundred times better when it's listened to while you're riding an opiate high. Those days are long gone for me, but it's all good. I still remember what it felt like

Ahhhhh I wouldn't touch opiates unless I only had a few weeks or months to live. I'd probably do heroin... but as long as I have the benefit of the doubt as to my futur, I'm stayin' away from that stuff! Besides... the MDMA high is matched by few other substances. Not only are you feeling incredibly happy, not only is every single touch and smell the most divine thing you've ever experienced, but trance music becomes the voice of a million angels united as one. It's simply... Heavenly. Overwhelming.

As for Infected Mushroom, I know what you mean when you say you don't need to be rolling... rolling just makes it better . There's not much Infected have done where I've said "Ya, well THAT sucked..." apart from NOT playing Heavyweight at the show *insert angry smiley here*. Music transcends... everything... and Infected Mushroom not only made me understand this... they made me experience it first hand.

I'll stop here... otherwise I'll just keep going on and on and on and on and on and -

 

[Apollo Matta]

the longer you wait the harder you will roll, period.
the more you take makes no difference,
shulgin says 90 days minimum and 120 mg.
though people use much more often than that, and more sparingly as well.
you have to do what feels right to you,
no one here can tell you what to do,
but out of harm reduction,
follow the 90 day rule,
though i dont,
and i think im fine... or should i be worried,
well i love the drug too much and its around,

i personally dont like mdma at a club or even concert,
i know im in the minority,
its just i like being in my room with close friends,
where i have control of music and entertainment,
because i find i want to do so many things at once,

 

[xburtonchic]

Ahhhhh I wouldn't touch opiates unless I only had a few weeks or months to live. I'd probably do heroin... but as long as I have the benefit of the doubt as to my futur, I'm stayin' away from that stuff! Besides... the MDMA high is matched by few other substances. Not only are you feeling incredibly happy, not only is every single touch and smell the most divine thing you've ever experienced, but trance music becomes the voice of a million angels united as one. It's simply... Heavenly. Overwhelming.

As for Infected Mushroom, I know what you mean when you say you don't need to be rolling... rolling just makes it better . There's not much Infected have done where I've said "Ya, well THAT sucked..." apart from NOT playing Heavyweight at the show *insert angry smiley here*. Music transcends... everything... and Infected Mushroom not only made me understand this... they made me experience it first hand.

I'll stop here... otherwise I'll just keep going on and on and on and on and on and -

I thought about what you were saying the other day, so when I listened to that song earlier I tried to close my eyes and just sort of get "lost" in the music. I didn't concentrate on anything else and it wasn't hard to let go of whatever worries came up. So I think I know what you mean about IM a little better now Good shit!

Although lol I'm really curious - why are you so against opiates but willing to try heroin, the strongest one of them all? haha I just found it kind of funny idk.

 

[Mac98]

the longer you wait the harder you will roll, period.
the more you take makes no difference,
shulgin says 90 days minimum and 120 mg.
though people use much more often than that, and more sparingly as well.
you have to do what feels right to you,
no one here can tell you what to do,
but out of harm reduction,
follow the 90 day rule,
though i dont,
and i think im fine... or should i be worried,
well i love the drug too much and its around,

i personally dont like mdma at a club or even concert,
i know im in the minority,
its just i like being in my room with close friends,
where i have control of music and entertainment,
because i find i want to do so many things at once,

I've always followed the 1 month break rule... but Shulgin's rule isn't 90 days. It's 3 to 4 times a year (which means 3 to 4 months break). But you're right about the 120mg... I don't feel rolling 12 times a year should be considered "safe". In fact, I find it to be a lot. Sure, we may not feel anything right now, but I've witnessed myself lose the magic slowly but surely. Besides... at the moment, the only MDMA I can find isn't really that great...

I thought about what you were saying the other day, so when I listened to that song earlier I tried to close my eyes and just sort of get "lost" in the music. I didn't concentrate on anything else and it wasn't hard to let go of whatever worries came up. So I think I know what you mean about IM a little better now Good shit!

Although lol I'm really curious - why are you so against opiates but willing to try heroin, the strongest one of them all? haha I just found it kind of funny idk.

Heroin only if I'm going to die soon. If I had a few weeks or months to live I'd go ape shit with the drugs. I'd do all of them lollllll. I'd seriously go nuts. But as long as I'm alive and kickin', I prefer to stay away from all opiates... including H.

Next time you feel like rolling... I beg of you to put on "Heavyweight" as loud as you fucken can and just let yourself ride the wave of paradisical beauty that will be crashing through you for those 8 minutes of your life...

It will change something inside of you. I promise.

 

[xburtonchic]

haha that sounds like it would be an awesome experience, but I don't think I'm ever going to roll again. Seriously. I'll just settle for the next best thing and try it on weed... weed can have it's own psychedelic properties if you let it after all

 

[Mac98]

haha that sounds like it would be an awesome experience, but I don't think I'm ever going to roll again. Seriously. I'll just settle for the next best thing and try it on weed... weed can have it's own psychedelic properties if you let it after all

Oh believe you me, that I know... I smoked my first joint last summer (2010) and only in November did I start to lose the magic of weed. Before that, a shared spliff would have me high out of my mind for up to 2 hours! 4 hours the first times I toked... I'd listen to Tool back then and I'd literally see shit in my head when I'd close my eyes. It was rival to how you experience music on ecstacy. Unfortunately, today I don't get that anymore... unless I get REALLY REALLY good weed which is rare...

Do you mind my asking why you don't think you'll ever roll again?

 

[xburtonchic]

Oh believe you me, that I know... I smoked my first joint last summer (2010) and only in November did I start to lose the magic of weed. Before that, a shared spliff would have me high out of my mind for up to 2 hours! 4 hours the first times I toked... I'd listen to Tool back then and I'd literally see shit in my head when I'd close my eyes. It was rival to how you experience music on ecstacy. Unfortunately, today I don't get that anymore... unless I get REALLY REALLY good weed which is rare...

Do you mind my asking why you don't think you'll ever roll again?

I vaguely remember the first few times I smoked - it might as well have been completely psychedelic those times haha but it felt sooo good! Insane closed eye visuals, completely altered perception of time and distance, music was on a whole other level... it's what makes people fall in love with it in the first place I guess haha. If only it could be that way EVERY time you smoke, but there's truly no way to get back to that point even if you take a break for a few years... it's too bad, really, but I suppose there are things out there that cause similar effects! They're just not as healthy! oh well, I still like my highs

Yeah I don't mind. I just overdid it. I'm really sensitive to stims - doing it as often as I was caused it to "lose the magic" pretty rapidly. My serotonin level was shot for a while, and that was not fun. I went through about 6 months after I "quit" in a complete daze. It felt like I was just going through the motions and like everything I did and every interaction I had was meaningless. The world just felt empty. I don't know how to describe it really, but I'd go as far as saying that it's about as bad as experiencing ego death for a few minutes. Whatever it just sucked. They offered me medication but I wanted to let my brain heal by itself, so I stopped taking it after like a week. I tried again about 2 years later, expecting it to go back to the way it was, but nope. I've experimented with several different pills and settings and people since then (in long, spaced out intervals) and it's always the same effect. I don't get the good feelings anymore, ever. I just don't feel anything at all actually, until I might get a little rush for 30 minutes or so, but usually not at all... and I'm anxious the entire time anyway, so it isn't fun regardless. Mostly it just gives me the gross feelings E gives you - I get the nystagmus and jaw clenching and feeling like you ran a marathon a few hours after you take it even if I've done nothing but sit in a hot tub - no euphoric effects worth speaking off. I'm the same way with all stims now, I can't take any of them. All they give me is a comedown, and the high feels dirty somehow, so fuck that. I stay away from them these days. Plus I'm already anxious, and stims of any kind completely send my anxiety through the roof. It's a really horrible feeling to have when there are no benzos around to kill it. And even when there are, it's excruciating waiting for them to kick in.

I guess it just boils down to the fact that I know how stims affect me, and it's not in a good way. They make me feel like absolute shit from the second I take them until I finally come down. I finally learned my lesson and stopped trying to take them every so often just to see if it will work... never does, and it's not worth it to me. I'm hella grateful for this actually. I don't run the risk of liking them too much and overdoing it the way I used to. Stims are THE worst drugs for your body and your brain, both in the short term and in the long run... so in my opinion it's kind of a good thing I hate them haha. E is not for me!

Haha that's actually sort of another interesting thing to note. Stimulants make me feel worn out almost as soon as I take them and drain my energy completely. But depressants give me a sense of energy and productivity. It's completely backwards haha. But the feelings of energy and productivity depressants give me feel a lot cleaner somehow... it's not nervous, tweaked out energy the way stims are. Depressants ftw, those are my vice

 

[Mac98]

Ohhhhh for me, it's the complete opposite. Alcohol and weed shut my whole system down once the high is over. That being said, I don't fall asleep on Codeine. Usually because I'm already stoned and I listen to music (which is perhaps one of the trippiest experiences when you listen to calm, soothing music (My personal favorite being "Humbling River" by Puscifer)).

I've never done Speed, coke or... actually, I've never done any stims apart from MDMA. And even then, I hardly call MDMA a stim. Often, it makes me fall into a puddle of goo with a huge smile and the eyes rolling to the back of my skull... although if need be, I can easily get up and start dancing my life away!! It has changed my life, this little substance. It's a feeling I feel everyone should experience at least once in their life. I'm sure it would change a lot of people's way of thinking. It did with me.

But this is why I don't want to overdo it either. I took a 2 month break from weed once and when I smoked my first joint I was hardly impressed. I was expecting it to be like the first times but it was no different from the last time I had smoked. Fortunately, it's a little more black and white with Molly, apparently. This is why I'm taking a 4 month break (I *might* even go for 5 or 6). I want to be thizzed out of my old mind next time around. It's a feeling I feel I need to experience again!

I'm sorry to hear you can't take stims anymore. However, I'd still be thankful that you at least got to live an MDMA high... many people never get to and to me, THAT'S what's truely sad.

And I know what you mean about the heavy MDMA crash. I had one too in April. Too much Molly + Girlfriend dumping you + Family problems all in a 3 day span worked like a charm to completely destroy any joy I had. It was a harsh 2 months... living without really knowing why or for what purpose. Terrible. Imo, THAT'S hell!

 

[xburtonchic]

5 or 6 months sounds like a better idea than 4 lol. But that's just me And yeah when I drink or get high, I can't help but crash out after the come down... whatever you want to call it on weed and alcohol haha. But while I'm actually high on a depressant like weed or opiates, I'm productive and have a ton of energy. Alcohol actually can make me either really tired or really amped up.. it's kind of shoot or miss, which is why I don't drink often either.

And yes. MDMA crash = ew. It's okay, I'm really not bothered at all by the fact I can't take stimulants. They're the dirtiest drugs to me. I'm not saying that to offend anyone... I know my drug of choice is the dirtiest one to other people, so whatevs... it's just my opinion haha. Unfortunately I don't remember what a really good roll feels like anymore, but I AM glad I experienced it. I can't recreate those feelings in my memory at least... but I do remember how AMAZING it made music sound, even for days after.

 

[Mac98]

but I do remember how AMAZING it made music sound, even for days after.

And THAT is what made me fall in love with Molly in the first place... To me, listening to music while rolling is the equivalent of transcending time and space and existing in another parallel universe altogether. It's insanity... but the good kind!

And yes, I agree that stims are dirty. Even MDMA, given that today's MDMA is usually cut with a whole bunch of unknown substances... But like you said, Opiates remain the dirtiest of them all. Smoking pure Opium is probably something I'd try though... if I can ever find something pure enough. After all... Opium isn't man-made .

That being said, if you can control your MDMA intake, it doesn't have to be "dirty". Taking MDMA once in your life shouldn't cause any harm to your mind and body at all (unless you pop like 8 pills lolll). In fact, I'd say there are a LOT of drugs that do no irrepairable damage to you if you can respect it...