It wouldn't be the "end of the world" if I don't get temazepam at all
I know it is weird replying to oneself, but was the only thing I could think of to get this post going. The above was posted Mar 5, 2025 to save you the trouble of trying to figure out what the fuck is going on here.
Just trying to remind myself that the craving I have for temazepam at this very moment is purely that, ........... a craving.
But fuck that, it would be such a treat to have some tonight, why tonight? who knows,, this is the point of this "dribble" or prose or whatever the "journaling/writing down" psych avenue this falls under.
Been almost 4 months since taking my last Temazepam and it hasn't been an issue at all. In fact it still isn't. Only tonight.
So after I have been through the "ringer" finally getting off the anti-depressants and also looking after myself in the process of quitting cigarettes (this was my decision to quit the AD's that my doc helped me with in the weaning process {the Mianserin, not the cigarettes).
Umm, well, that might be a bit too nice, the doc doesn't know a lot of my background so I guess she was just doing her best, and it worked out at the end of the day ( or at the end of the 2 months of feeling like an Alien ) - but I knew I was in for a tough ride, I was shocked at how difficult it was.
Anyway, that is now in the past.
Let's move on.
So right now everything is going well. As well as things could go in life. I feel good, not bored, not hungry, not lonely etc., but
FUCK!! 40mg of Temazepam right now would be fantastic. That's all I want, one dose. lol Jesus, listen to me.. ok, nearly finished..... so, I have my zopiclone (plenty) and alprazolam(plenty),
but that isn't what I am wanting right now, and wouldn't want to waste either of those meds to try get this "instant gratification" of Temazepam out of my head or resolved.
So I posted this "splurge"



and am glad I did.
I will now go smoke a nice fat, self hand rolled, "Pink Panties" joint ( which I haven't prepared yet ) but will get on it immediately.
Thanks for listening/reading and/or ignoring.
Posting this actually did help me with this pathetic "dilemma".
That's it for now before I start slipping back into the "victim" mindset again and "waffle" on about a craving I haven't thought about in the ten minutes I have been typing for.
Hope you are all having a good weekend and are at least seeing the world as what it is and not a threat to us personally. (Fuck knows where that sentence came from, but there it is).
Going to get the Panties story ready for ignition now.
Cya later.