🌟🌟 Social 🌟🌟 The 2025 Recovery & Social Thread

[Ds]

Oh I know. The systems are just Crazy like that. I mean crazy. How awful.

Today I have to take my meds too. Three methotrexate 2.5's every Thursday.


.... Good luck. It's not just an in and out thing anymore with the Pharmacy and the whole system anymore.

At least not a large percentage of the time. Yes, Sir !!!!!!!!!!!!!!!



glad you made it Mr.



Thanks for you Support.

Hi kiely! Hope you are doing well today.
I finally got my prescriptions today! I filled out a grievance form and 10 minutes later I was called to the office to get my medicine! I don't think the grievance did anything, but it might help to let them aware that they run so behind on medicines. If you get prescribed medication on Monday then you should have your medicine atleast by Tuesday morning. I had to wait until Thursday.

Well, one thing I really don't like here in the sober living house is that I cannot pick & chose my roommates. So for the last few roomates they have been absolutely shit.
Man, I just hope my next roomate is actually wanting to get sober and do the right thing.

 

[mal3volent]

I've noticed that there are 2 feelings that trap a majority of people. They are regret and anxiety.
Full of regret, like dealing with past failures.
Full of anxiety, future events that I can't control.
Not being able to stop thinking is more dangerous than not thinking at all.
'Over thinking' is an actual disease.
The mind will tell you that you are at a 'dis ease'.
Emotions are not felt but manifested in a physical way.
The only problem that can solve the problem is dealing with the now.

Well said.

 

[Ds]

So I've been waiting on the druggy buggy to come and pick me up since about 8:30, and the van is supposed to have been here between 9-9:30/10, and here it is 10:30. I've called up to the rehab center that I'm currently enrolled in & they mentioned that there are several other houses that haven't been picked up yet, & they are running behind. So atleast I did my part & mentioned it to the 'higher ups' that I've communicated with them about not being picked up.
Well speak if the devil the van just showed up! So now I'm headed to class. All of this wouldn't have been a problem, but since I'm on a routine to wake up at 7:50, get ready & get on the van at 9:30 it kind of throws me off.
I just don't want to be penalized for missing group.
--
Anyways, i hope i get my discharge date today. I've got things set up back home, with a therapist, psychiatrist and meetings & groups, and everytime i ask about a discharge date they just tell me that they don't have a date yet, so hopefully they don't like fucking surprise me with a 'oh you have to leave tomorrow ' or something fucked. If they did that then I'd raise hell to get an extension until a week later, so i can atleast get packed up.
--
Atleast it is Friday. I just hope and pray that it will be a pretty good day & weekend. I've got plenty of food and such so atleast i wont go hungry.
--
ive been journaling a lot since I've been sober, I started journaling around 11/7/24, and have been writing atleast 2 pages everyday up to today. It feels really good to journal. It's like I'm talking with someone, and I'm able to discuss ideas and situations that I'm in and it feels good to let things out on paper(like how i feel, and what's been going on in my life). So honestly I'm kind of excited to journal everyday. I highly recommend it because it's good to read back and hear how you've overcome some obstacles and read about what you've done during situations.
--
Okay that's enough of me lol, I'm headed to my IOP class, and looking forward to the weekend!

 

[paltatomate]

Anyways, i hope i get my discharge date today.

good luck. let us know.

I just don't want to be penalized for missing group.

you did call to complain about the van not coming. and you weren't the only one.
if you got late it wasn't because of you, so why would they penalize you? even if they did, you have all the aforementioned arguments in your favor.
was the delay because of some weather conditions?
i remember i once got like 4 hours late to a court date because of unexpected weather.

looking forward to the weekend!

i hope you'll have a great one!

 

[Ds]

So the van just ran late as hell. The program was understanding that I ran late because of something out of my control. I had got to class and we had some journal prompts to write about.

I wrote that: I might be a bit ambivalent about my recovery, I still secretly hold onto the idea that I will one day be able to drink or get high again. My fucked up thinking means that I might not feel the need to put much effort into my recovery because it's not important enough to maintain it.

Even when I ride the pink cloud experience where I feel high on life, and completely in control of my life. I feel like people who are riding the pink cloud become overconfident and leads to complacency, then we are all fucked.

I believe that once people have been sober for a year or two it becomes a habit, and we no longer need to think about it to much. I feel like the problem occurs when we forget we had a problem to begin with.

When I become sober I feel like I'm in a position to achieve some actual success in life, and I'll allow my success to go to my head and I can feel that I'm above the need to continue to go to meetings or call my sponsor & work the steps and whatever keeps me sober.

I just think that some people just don't realize that recovery is a process and not an actual event. It means that as soon as they stop getting fucked up then they feel like their work is done.

I think that the only way to prevent anyone from feeling sone type of way in their program is just to feel grateful about somethings and share some gratitude with another. Simple things, and this is something my sponsor and I do with one another whenever we talk, and I feel somewhat better.

 

[AngelsandFairiesarereal]

So the van just ran late as hell. The program was understanding that I ran late because of something out of my control. I had got to class and we had some journal prompts to write about.

I wrote that: I might be a bit ambivalent about my recovery, I still secretly hold onto the idea that I will one day be able to drink or get high again. My fucked up thinking means that I might not feel the need to put much effort into my recovery because it's not important enough to maintain it.

Even when I ride the pink cloud experience where I feel high on life, and completely in control of my life. I feel like people who are riding the pink cloud become overconfident and leads to complacency, then we are all fucked.

I believe that once people have been sober for a year or two it becomes a habit, and we no longer need to think about it to much. I feel like the problem occurs when we forget we had a problem to begin with.

When I become sober I feel like I'm in a position to achieve some actual success in life, and I'll allow my success to go to my head and I can feel that I'm above the need to continue to go to meetings or call my sponsor & work the steps and whatever keeps me sober.

I just think that some people just don't realize that recovery is a process and not ab actual event. It means that as soon as they stop getting fucked up then they feel like their work us done.

I think that the only way to prevent anyone from feeling sone type of way in their program is just to feel grateful about thing and share some gratitude with another. Simple things, and this is something my sponsor and I do with one another whenever we talk, and I feel somewhat better.

Just want you to know I’m really proud of you sweetie … I really mean that too

 

[Ds]

Just want you to know I’m really proud of you sweetie … I really mean that too

Thank you for those kind words ! It means a lot!

 

[kiely]

@Nas47 I am so sorry about your Doggie.

I was just thinking about my doggie but not because of what you said but because of animals and life and all.
When I was ten years old my doggie got hit too. And my heart is still broken. It will be broken.

Next time I will write in the Dark Side because this is where it starts to get the darkest.
Anyway don't do anything to make if feel worse and this really is where it starts to
happen. I just hope that you can continue to stay as healthy as possible and do the best that we can.

It's a long journey but just keep being as comfortable as possible and avoid being hurt from it too, when you can.
When you have to. But please feel better soon whenever you can.

I know this one is going to be tough .... and you are the Toughest

 

[kiely]

Well I can sleep now. I remember when I thought I would never be able to again.

But the headaches got kind of weird. And still are. I think I am doomed.


Might be kind of a bad thing. Might be really bad.

I am just trying to keep holding on to some kind of strength.


Mostly stiff and headaches .... is bad enough. lol.


Be kind to yourself.

Take Care.

 

[Ds]

Well, tomorrow is the big day. I'll find out if I'm leaving this shit hole of a rehab center. I've literally learned how to journal better here. Since that is the only fucking thing we do in class & share about it. & That's it, go bacn to the sober living.
I'm packed and ready. I'm hoping that they give me a bus ticket tomorrow & my graduation paper.
The worse they could tell me is no, that they are still waiting to hear back from my insurance.
Though if that's the case I'm debating whether or not to tell them that I'm ready to go. & Hopefully they'll just let me go, but if they tell me that I cannot leave like that then I just have to keep toughing it out.
I am just afraid that they'd come and wake me up at night to tell me I've got to go. I've seen that happen to many times, and I don't want to be unprepared. Though if they did do that to me and it's all legit, then I'd rather go stay at a hotel for the night and catch a bus in the morning.
So I just hope that tomorrow I get some news that I'm leaving this place!

 

[LucidSDreamr]

I did a painful taper down to 1 mg methadone per day the past few weeks.

Now I’m on day 2 of no methadone. The taper was really hard getting from 10 mg down to 2 mg. Right now though I feel minor withdrawl and was able to sleep last night without taking any methadone whatsoever.

I know 2 days is very early in the game to say I’m clear; but maybe I paid my price mostly during the taper down to 1 mg I’m hoping. You think that’s true?

 

[helpingout]

I did a painful taper down to 1 mg methadone per day the past few weeks.

Now I’m on day 2 of no methadone. The taper was really hard getting from 10 mg down to 2 mg. Right now though I feel minor withdrawl and was able to sleep last night without taking any methadone whatsoever.

I know 2 days is very early in the game to say I’m clear; but maybe I paid my price mostly during the taper down to 1 mg I’m hoping. You think that’s true?

I think you have paid the first toll along the way. There are many more roads you must take. There are more tolls to be paid. The coin is pain. I am here for you. I can help you. Let me know what I can do.

Here is the master list in order of importance

DLPA- has the most profound overall benefit by providing building blocks of dopamine
Magnesium - helps with restless legs and stress
Liposomal vitamin C - helps with everything
Vitamin D- helps with the PAWS depression
L-theanine - helps with stress by providing immediate calm take more than recommended like 300 mg
ashwaghanda - regulates cortisol levels which are going to be going haywire
Multivitamin - helps with everything
B-complex- get that shit out of your system faster and have energy in the fucking mire of post opiate life
Iron— helps with not having been eating right if that was the case for you

This may be just me but I also keep really fuxked up hot chilis on hand. If you rub them on your gums and oral mucosa they can release super potent endogenous endorphins like opiorphine which will give you a solid twenty minutes of relief. Mmmmmmm pain

Speaking of pain.

Go get your ears acupunctured. Just tell them it’s for heron or opiate detox. Maybe placebo sure but placebo works 50% of the time if you believe the placebo will help

under the advice of your doctor
Good comfort meds
Gabapentin - 1800 mg is used by Iranian doctors but this is unprecedented in the us but I found it worked for heron withdrawal
Clonidine - never tried it but I’ve heard good things
Don’t know anything about the dosage
A benzo- helps with the sleeping. Don’t use it for anything else.

If you can find the strength. Begin light exercise as soon as possible. Endorphins really help.

Remember that you’re going to be hopeless. You’re going to be sad. You’re going to have to rebuild your life, your coping mechanisms, and your reward system from scratch. No one can do this for you. Rehab can help if you’re afraid you can’t bear the weight. You’re stronger than you think. But everyone needs help.

If you’re going to relapse it’s time to consider MAT
I’d rather see you on methadone than see you curled over in the street scratching your bones through a xylazine sore

I’d rather see your teeth fall out from suboxone usage than see you with the smile the mortician chose for you because fent took you from us.

I’d rather see you at the Smokeshop buying kratom having decided to give kicking another try later.


I’m a college graduate. It took me longer to make the decision to quit using opiates and even longer to quit than it took me to earn a four years degree; and that took me seven years.

I’m speaking from experience.

I know you can do it.

Take time away from work if you need to.

I’ll borrow from something u told my friend Anthony

“ hope you can make it past the really hard stuff. Picture yourself in the park. Lying on a big blanket. Little charcuterie. A person you love. It’s a beautiful day for a picnic in the park. You didn’t have to wake up and dose. You don’t have to run to the bathroom and dose. You don’t need to dose first thing when you get home. That’s what you’re quitting for. Not so much your family or the possibility of an OD. But because you deserve to have that freedom to just be alive, to just be happy, and to have no obligation to some receptors in your brain. But like you said, not OD ing is really important and I get that. But what I really wish for you is the freedom that comes with taking some time away from this chemically dependent life that it seems has not been so gratifying given the health troubles you’ve faced with overdoses.”

Or just being sick and tired of using.

All I know is when you get everything right again. Being sober feels kind of good.

Let me tell you where I’m at today.

It was hot. I could feel it. The wind was cool. I could feel that. No golden blanket hiding me from experiencing the world. I drive with the windows down getting dopamine from music. I’m happy. I worked for nine hours. I talked to my best friend. I felt joy.

That isn’t to say I didn’t feel sadness. Look up my post before this one. The point is. There is sweet with the bitter. And I did something good for someone today even though it took a lot out of me.

Now I’m writing this for you, for Anthony, for myself, for everyone who like me wanted to quit at home : e it for pride or arrogance or for a belief in the indefeatable nature of our human spirit.

I know you can do this.
If you’ve quit before and relapsed.
I know you can do this again
Good luck. God speed.

May the gods smile upon you
Perhaps you will smile back.

It will be of great assistance to you to acquire these supplements as quickly as possible. Before the sickness is worse. But I admire your strength and I know you can do it. I know you can because I believe you can do what I have done.

Don’t be afraid of the pain you must pay with. Accept it. And know that it is the cost of your freedom.

 

[LucidSDreamr]

I think you have paid the first toll along the way. There are many more roads you must take. There are more tolls to be paid. The coin is pain. I am here for you. I can help you. Let me know what I can do.

I don’t feel the withdrawl getting worse I feel it getting easier as time goes on.

My biggest problem is relapsing on the methadone if my pain blows up. My pain seems to blow up after excercise, when the muscles get tight the day after….i think I need to quit rigorous excercise forever to stay out of pain if I don’t want to relapse.

My pain is orettt bad right now but I know a lot of it is hyperalgesia caused by the opioids.

It’s very hard to give up sports and stuff as I greatly enjoy them and they are good for my mental health. Maybe it’s time I settle for just long walks instead of heavy excercise.

 

[AngelsandFairiesarereal]

I don’t feel the withdrawl getting worse I feel it getting easier as time goes on.

My biggest problem is relapsing on the methadone if my pain blows up. My pain seems to blow up after excercise, when the muscles get tight the day after….i think I need to quit rigorous excercise forever to stay out of pain if I don’t want to relapse.

My pain is orettt bad right now but I know a lot of it is hyperalgesia caused by the opioids.

It’s very hard to give up sports and stuff as I greatly enjoy them and they are good for my mental health. Maybe it’s time I settle for just long walks instead of heavy excercise.

Just wanted to throw you some support amigo. I as well have chronic pain and also have struggled with addiction throughout my life … it’s a heck of a combo isn’t it.

Sending you support & hope

 

[paltatomate]

t’s very hard to give up sports and stuff as I greatly enjoy them and they are good for my mental health. Maybe it’s time I settle for just long walks instead of heavy excercise.

Don't be so final on the excercise. The idea of giving up on something you like might get you depressed.

Take it easier for the moment, and as time goes by and you recover, you can start getting more rigorous little by little.

 

[Ds]

Another day kind of left in the dark in the program that I'm in. Still no clue when I might be graduating, or how much longer my insurance is going to pay for treatment. I feel like the program wants to strech it out as long as they possibly can because they know that they can get money from someone that attends class when they are supposed too.
It's been hard setting up work back home because I don't have any date whenever I might get back to set up any interviews. So feels like I'm just existing at the moment. A lot of the IOP class content is starting to repeat, so I'm finding myself doing a double take on my work because I have possibly journaled about the journal entry we do every day at some earlier time.
Still have all of my medication, and have over a month worth of my Suboxone left(well maybe more because I'm prescribed 3x 8mg a day, and I really just take 2 a day). So I guess for now I keep on keeping on until things change, and hopefully they change for the better, and I don't get stuck going backwards.

 

[LucidSDreamr]

The coin is pain

This phrase has been at the forefront of this withdrawal process. You might’ve actually helped prevent a relapse already. Since I have a chronic pain condition, there is more to this than just normal opioid withdrawal.

The pain rises and sometimes falls. In moment of weakness when the pain rises; I just remember that:

“The coin is pain”

I don’t know if my pain will resolve itself after being clean for a while like it did last time I got clean (6 years ago)….but it did after 2 weeks and I spent 1.5 years pain free and opioid free. That is what I’m seeking to replicate.

I can’t go back, I have to ride this pain out and see if there is freedom at the other side of this.

 

[helpingout]

This phrase has been at the forefront of this withdrawal process. You might’ve actually helped prevent a relapse already. Since I have a chronic pain condition, there is more to this than just normal opioid withdrawal.

The pain rises and sometimes falls. In moment of weakness when the pain rises; I just remember that:

“The coin is pain”

I don’t know if my pain will resolve itself after being clean for a while like it did last time I got clean (6 years ago)….but it did after 2 weeks and I spent 1.5 years pain free and opioid free. That is what I’m seeking to replicate.

I can’t go back, I have to ride this pain out and see if there is freedom at the other side of this.

I hope there is. Living with opiate dependency due to pain issues can be absolute hell. It’s so difficult to have to turn back to what ultimately is its own source of pain out of medical necessity. It’s also something I struggle with. Right now I’ve been pain free since junk but I do worry about legitimate need arising at some point due to some genetic conditions and it is horrifying to think that what I turned my back on I might have to turn towards at some point. Here’s to hoping you and I can both stay pain and opiate/oid free.

By the way, get those vitamins. It truly makes such a significant difference for at least the first two months.

 

[LucidSDreamr]

I hope there is. Living with opiate dependency due to pain issues can be absolute hell. It’s so difficult to have to turn back to what ultimately is its own source of pain out of medical necessity. It’s also something I struggle with. Right now I’ve been pain free since junk but I do worry about legitimate need arising at some point due to some genetic conditions and it is horrifying to think that what I turned my back on I might have to turn towards at some point. Here’s to hoping you and I can both stay pain and opiate/oid free.

By the way, get those vitamins. It truly makes such a significant difference for at least the first two months.

I broke and took a Valium dose today according to my scripted dosage (15 mg). The pain was too much.

I wasn’t dependent on Valium before and hadn’t taken Valium in 2 weeks.

It’s day 5 no methadone. Still off of that.

Ideslly I would try to get clean when my pain isn’t flared, but I have a lot of time off work right now and even though I’m in a pain flare I figured I would try to kick the methadone.

Terrified of benzo dependency and now that opioids are out of the picture I do worry about leaning on benzos too much.

 

[helpingout]

I broke and took a Valium dose today according to my scripted dosage (15 mg). The pain was too much.

I wasn’t dependent on Valium before and hadn’t taken Valium in 2 weeks.

It’s day 5 no methadone. Still off of that.

Ideslly I would try to get clean when my pain isn’t flared, but I have a lot of time off work right now and even though I’m in a pain flare I figured I would try to kick the methadone.

Terrified of benzo dependency and now that opioids are out of the picture I do worry about leaning on benzos too much.

Maybe looking into ACT would help you out a little. Stephen Hayes “a liberated mind” is a good place to start. In the book he says that it helped a bunch of people deal with chronic pain and desperately that something like 40% of a specific group of people with opiate use disorder were able to get off opiates. I hope it helps! It’s helping me a ton