Mental Health Coming Off Vraylar (cariprazine), Rexulti (brexpiprazole), or Abilify (aripiprazole)

[SlowVeil]

You are reaching the end. Like, still 1-2 weeks and you'll be fine.

Thanks for encouraging me. It really sucks that I don't have any sort of "100% clear window" but in the meantime, I still can notice some very slow non-linear gradual changes. However, they are still 24/7 (including tinnitus but it doesn't bother me when I sleep).
The physical symptoms/feelings bring me the most stress and I am very sure most of my mental symptoms are induced by them.

I am glad vraylar worked for others. Sometimes harm elimination is not possible so harm reduction is the best option. However, I would rather have a mental breakdown and cry all day than use any psych meds. They hit my body like a lobotomy.

 

[Master Green]

Thanks for encouraging me. It really sucks that I don't have any sort of "100% clear window" but in the meantime, I still can notice some very slow non-linear gradual changes. However, they are still 24/7 (including tinnitus but it doesn't bother me when I sleep).
The physical symptoms/feelings bring me the most stress and I am very sure most of my mental symptoms are induced by them.

I am glad vraylar worked for others. Sometimes harm elimination is not possible so harm reduction is the best option. However, I would rather have a mental breakdown and cry all day than use any psych meds. They hit my body like a lobotomy.

At this time you start developing psychosis or schizophrenia again.
It is time to level up. I see you are confident about to speak about your ferlings. That's good man.
So eventually talking to a female doctor /woman about your current situation is a way. It was for me.
Good luck.

 

[SlowVeil]

At this time you start developing psychosis or schizophrenia again.
It is time to level up. I see you are confident about to speak about your ferlings. That's good man.
So eventually talking to a female doctor /woman about your current situation is a way. It was for me.
Good luck.

The closest "psychosis" situation I've ever had is just me crying most of the days and not doing anything that I planned to do/I am supposed to do, but I can still eat fine, and again not even a roller coaster ride can stimulate me.
Never had any form of tinnitus that lasts for more than a day before withdrawing all meds this year and it doesn't really depend on if I am stressed or not. I am physically and mentally tired of all the symptoms I am having to the point that I am basically bedbound.

 

[Master Green]

The closest "psychosis" situation I've ever had is just me crying most of the days and not doing anything that I planned to do/I am supposed to do, but I can still eat fine, and again not even a roller coaster ride can stimulate me.
Never had any form of tinnitus that lasts for more than a day before withdrawing all meds this year and it doesn't really depend on if I am stressed or not. I am physically and mentally tired of all the symptoms I am having to the point that I am basically bedbound.

Process your emotions. Take your time. Wtite them down. Write mindfully. Get out of the fight or flight. No distractions. No tv no phone... it is important.

 

[SlowVeil]

day 114 update:
yesterday my tinnitus (ringing in my right ear) start to have some variations. When my tinnitus began around 4/10, it was like a static noise at a bit higher pitch, and it gradually developed into high pitched ringing noise and stayed that way some days later. Yesterday there are some periods(less than 5 appearances) where my tinnitus returned to higher pitch static noise for a few minutes. Feels like every time the tinnitus noise changes the "location" of it also changes. The high-pitched ringing noise is in my ear canal and the static noise is beyond my inner ear.
electro + numbness feeling mainly stay in hands and feet, but sometimes they would creep back to legs and arms again. Sleep has become shorter again. No more "decrease in symptoms" in the morning. muscle fasciculations become around 80 tics/hour.

 

[SlowVeil]

day 124 update:
I traveled back to my hometown. Now just waiting to check up with doctors and let my family do most of the tasks for me while I take rest. No noticeable symptom improvement and I find myself dangerously obsessed with tinnitus now. Feel permanently damaged by vraylar and all those meds that were supposed to "help" me. Psych meds surely are neurotoxins to me at this point.

 

[n3ophy7e]

Thanks for your continued updates @SlowVeil . That is interesting about your tinnitus changing. I have mentioned to you before that I have medication-induced tinnitus as well.

 

[SlowVeil]

Thanks for your continued updates @SlowVeil . That is interesting about your tinnitus changing. I have mentioned to you before that I have medication-induced tinnitus as well.

I was not able to find the exact response where you mentioned that you have medication-induced tinnitus, and I hope yours get resolved soon. How long have you been experiencing tinnitus? Did it start while you are on meds or after you quit?

 

[n3ophy7e]

I was not able to find the exact response where you mentioned that you have medication-induced tinnitus, and I hope yours get resolved soon. How long have you been experiencing tinnitus? Did it start while you are on meds or after you quit?

It may have been in a different thread? I'm not sure. My tinnitus is a side effect of Cymbalta (my antidepressant) which I am still on. I don't plan to cease taking it any time soon because I am so stable on it, and my liver is coping perfectly fine while on it so there's no need to stop it. The tinnitus started almost immediately when I started on Cymbalta, and I've been on it for over 10 years. It's mainly in my left ear and it's quite loud, hence has cause some subjective hearing loss. I say "subjective hearing loss" because my hearing is significantly affected, yet whenever I have it tested they say my hearing is normal...which leads me to believe that I don't have any deafness caused by structural changes in the inner ear, cochlea and auditory nerve, but the perceptive deafness caused by tinnitus is occurring much further in, inside the brain. I don't know if my way of thinking is correct but it's a theory nonetheless.

 

[SlowVeil]

It may have been in a different thread? I'm not sure. My tinnitus is a side effect of Cymbalta (my antidepressant) which I am still on. I don't plan to cease taking it any time soon because I am so stable on it, and my liver is coping perfectly fine while on it so there's no need to stop it. The tinnitus started almost immediately when I started on Cymbalta, and I've been on it for over 10 years. It's mainly in my left ear and it's quite loud, hence has cause some subjective hearing loss. I say "subjective hearing loss" because my hearing is significantly affected, yet whenever I have it tested they say my hearing is normal...which leads me to believe that I don't have any deafness caused by structural changes in the inner ear, cochlea and auditory nerve, but the perceptive deafness caused by tinnitus is occurring much further in, inside the brain. I don't know if my way of thinking is correct but it's a theory nonetheless.

I see, and hats off to you for enduring it for over 10 years. How do you cope with tinnitus? I guess I need to prepare my mentality for the worst case: I am indeed permanently damaged (I hope the optimal situation is that I just have a long recovery time but I am naturally pessimistic).

 

[Jerry Atrick]

I see, and hats off to you for enduring it for over 10 years. How do you cope with tinnitus? I guess I need to prepare my mentality for the worst case: I am indeed permanently damaged (I hope the optimal situation is that I just have a long recovery time but I am naturally pessimistic).

I know your question was directed at n3oph7e but I've lived with tinnitus for over 20 years. It was gradual and I didn't even know I had hearing loss until I tried to join the military in 2003. They gave me a hearing test and I couldn't pick up the high pitched frequencies therefore they wouldn't let me enlist. Really dodged a bullet there because I prolly would have been sent to the Middle East and I now rebuke those invasions.

Anyways, I believe the reason I got tinnitus was from going to loud clubs and concerts in college as well as hunting. Can't wear hearing protection when hunting deer and other critters and a rifle blast is pretty intense.

Honestly I have just gotten used to it. I can sometimes tune it out but most of the time I can ignore it or not dwell on it. I can hear ringing as I type this.

It hasn't stopped me from enjoying playing acoustic guitar and banjo even though I'm sure they are making it worse. I have also gotten used to asking quiet talkers to repeat themselves. My best advice is to just keep trucking and enjoy your life. Try not to dwell on it or let it distract you. FYI my mom, dad, brother, grandfather all use hearing aids. I still refuse to take that step because I've heard once you go that route, you will lose whatever small amount of hearing you have left. I'd personally rather live with some ringing than live with hearing aids. YMMV

 

[SlowVeil]

My best advice is to just keep trucking and enjoy your life. Try not to dwell on it or let it distract you.

Thank you and also hats off to you as well. That's what I have been trying to do but it's very hard. When I hear them it's like a reminder that damage has happened to me and I won't be able to enjoy quietness anymore. (like someone who just discovered they are paralyzed from the waist after a car crash) I mourn over my situation.
I did an auditory exam on 6/27 and the audiologist told me there's nothing wrong with my hearing or my middle ear. She told me if there's some damage to the middle ear the response chart (not the hearing one but the one that they play some sound in earplugs and your ear respond to it) would show abnormalities. So maybe it really is something that happened inside my brain.

 

[Jerry Atrick]

Thank you and also hats off to you as well. That's what I have been trying to do but it's very hard. When I hear them it's like a reminder that damage has happened to me and I won't be able to enjoy quietness anymore. (like someone who just discovered they are paralyzed from the waist after a car crash) I mourn over my situation.
I did an auditory exam on 6/27 and the audiologist told me there's nothing wrong with my hearing or my middle ear. She told me if there's some damage to the middle ear the response chart (not the hearing one but the one that they play some sound in earplugs and your ear respond to it) would show abnormalities. So maybe it really is something that happened inside my brain.

Hmm, I can't say I can explain how you have tinnitus and still are able to pass a hearing test unless the ringing has not progressed very far yet. In my experience, I don't think I have hearing loss as much as the ringing simply blocks out certain frequencies. But I still can't pass a hearing test due to the ringing preventing me from hearing those frequencies.

I'm sorry you are dealing with this and I hope your tinnitus either subsides or you find a healthy way to cope.

 

[SlowVeil]

Hmm, I can't say I can explain how you have tinnitus and still are able to pass a hearing test unless the ringing has not progressed very far yet. In my experience, I don't think I have hearing loss as much as the ringing simply blocks out certain frequencies. But I still can't pass a hearing test due to the ringing preventing me from hearing those frequencies.

I'm sorry you are dealing with this and I hope your tinnitus either subsides or you find a healthy way to cope.

Thank you for the reply. noise-induced tinnitus can progress? What would the tinnitus progress be like? I know mine progressed with changing tones, pitches, and volumes but it's very new to see noise-induced tinnitus can progress. noise-induced tinnitus is usually a compensation made by the brain for the frequencies that are lost in hearing loss.
maybe mine has a different underlying cause. Now that I'm in my hometown I'm trying to get another check asap.

 

[n3ophy7e]

I see, and hats off to you for enduring it for over 10 years. How do you cope with tinnitus? I guess I need to prepare my mentality for the worst case: I am indeed permanently damaged (I hope the optimal situation is that I just have a long recovery time but I am naturally pessimistic).

Hey sorry for the late reply to this post, but I'd have to say pretty much what Jerry said. I've simply gotten so used to my tinnitus that most of the time I don't consciously notice it. It really only bothers me if the room is really quiet, if I have insomnia, or if I focus in on it. At times it can be almost deafening and almost give me a headache. But I try to let it just wash away in to the background of my field of perception, if that makes sense.

 

[Master Green]

Hmm, I can't say I can explain how you have tinnitus and still are able to pass a hearing test unless the ringing has not progressed very far yet. In my experience, I don't think I have hearing loss as much as the ringing simply blocks out certain frequencies. But I still can't pass a hearing test due to the ringing preventing me from hearing those frequencies.

I'm sorry you are dealing with this and I hope your tinnitus either subsides or you find a healthy way to cope.

Dry fasting.

 

[Jerry Atrick]

Thank you for the reply. noise-induced tinnitus can progress? What would the tinnitus progress be like? I know mine progressed with changing tones, pitches, and volumes but it's very new to see noise-induced tinnitus can progress. noise-induced tinnitus is usually a compensation made by the brain for the frequencies that are lost in hearing loss.
maybe mine has a different underlying cause. Now that I'm in my hometown I'm trying to get another check asap.

Yeah, I unfortunately I don't know much about the technical or scientific aspects of tinnitus. In fact, I don't think I've ever been to an ENT specialist except for a second opinion hearing test when the military was in the process of weeding me out. Anyways, it seems like my hearing has slowly gotten worse over the years but like I said, I haven't even been tested since then and that was nearly 20 years ago. Makes me wonder if I shouldn't book an appointment to an ENT myself.

 

[SlowVeil]

Day 131:
no window in physical symptoms as usual. Still feel very permanently damaged. Since late June there are times I would feel pressure pain on either side of my head, particularly the area near my ear, and that pain would travel from outside to inside.
I may have developed bruxism as this morning when I faintly woke up I found my jaw moved with bruxism noises.

I do not think I am anhedonia as I still get pleasant feeling when looking at the views outside or looking at videos I enjoy. I just feel very hopeless regarding my physical symptoms. Getting hit at mid-20s makes me feel like all my aspirations and futures are shattered, like the one falcon I saw in a university's raptor captive care whose right-wing got shot and vet had to amputate it to prevent further lethal infection. It was the most depressed bird I've ever seen: seems like it can realize its wing is lost and it could never fly again, and it just sat in one corner of its captive, with stacked meat that it barely touched.

 

[Master Green]

Day 131:
no window in physical symptoms as usual. Still feel very permanently damaged. Since late June there are times I would feel pressure pain on either side of my head, particularly the area near my ear, and that pain would travel from outside to inside.
I may have developed bruxism as this morning when I faintly woke up I found my jaw moved with bruxism noises.

I do not think I am anhedonia as I still get pleasant feeling when looking at the views outside or looking at videos I enjoy. I just feel very hopeless regarding my physical symptoms. Getting hit at mid-20s makes me feel like all my aspirations and futures are shattered, like the one falcon I saw in a university's raptor captive care whose right-wing got shot and vet had to amputate it to prevent further lethal infection. It was the most depressed bird I've ever seen: seems like it can realize its wing is lost and it could never fly again, and it just sat in one corner of its captive, with stacked meat that it barely touched.

There is always a way.

 

[Jabberwocky]

I came off Vraylar very fast because the half life is so long - didn't feel much difference