Benzos Alprazolam.

[Winter666]

@emkee_reinvented
I think,You should stop Poly psychoactive compounds using........

 

[MsDiz]

@emkee_reinvented
I think,You should stop Poly psychoactive compounds using........

Rather than having a go at people trying to help you on your thread you’d be better clarifying what dose you are on. That is the question @emkee_reinvented asked.

This thread is derailing. Back to the OP.

 

[JackARoe]

Etizolam is just like Alprazolam, in my eyes. They all fall under Benzo like drug's.

Yeah I have both alrpazolam (not prescribed just stashed for emergency use) and I have etizolam (of course not presribed here in the US) . I can not tell the difference between these two except when I wake up after alprazolam I can still feel a little groggy. Etizolam wears off cleaner. Like I took nothing the night before. I think the half life is shorter for etizolam. I grew up using diazepam sometimes and that stuff I wake up the next day and half the day I still have grogginess and amnesia.

 

[emkee_reinvented]

Rather than having a go at people trying to help you on your thread you’d be better clarifying what dose you are on. That is the question @emkee_reinvented asked.

This thread is derailing. Back to the OP.

Thank's for saving me from listing what I am on atm, not relevant. Mostly grieving about the loss of 'Captain. Heroin'. And Limpet_Chicken.

 

[LordOfThisWorld]

Hey.

Man. I don't even know what to say to you or how to advise you. I have never experienced the same ever in my working life. That's not to say that everybody took a liking to me (no surprises there I guess! ). But I made it a habit of avoiding those that may have had issues with me, or visa versa, whenever possible. But sometimes that's not practicable or possible I know. And even harder if it's an immediate superior i.e. I had this experience once. Cunt won the battle i.e. I just couldn't take it anymore. Dude went out of his way, as far as was possible anyway under the labor laws, to make my life an absolute fucking misery. Unfortunately for him: he couldn't fire me (long story). But he never let up until I couldn't take it anymore. Pity. Because as formal employment goes: that was my best job ever and one that truly had long term career potential (and I'd already been there for 8 years). Fuck. My pension alone by now would have been worth a fortune if nothing else. Fair enough: I went on to bigger and better things and ended up being self employed for the rest of my days since then and made piles. But given the choice of being able to have stayed there vs. the good life and freedom that followed being self employed and knowing what I know now and how it's all turned out: I'd have happily stayed at said company. But I just couldn't. Everyone has their limits. Mother fucker is still there and with all of his benefits. And I'm on the bones or my backside now (although I cannot blame him for that). And this type of shit is even harder when self employed i.e. pandering to clients who actually cannot stand you but will keep you around because you know what you're doing. And being clients, and good ones at that, you have to suck it up or lose the income. Eventually you develop a thick skin I guess!

As for worrying about what other people think or say behind your back (even if it be that is not the case) I can only give you the advice that I have given one or two others and have implemented myself. Those people don't give a flying fuck about you. And when they pack up and go home at night: believe me you're probably the last thing on their minds. They're at home with their kin and their own lives. You are the only one that's carrying the shit around with you and suffering as a result. And from what I gather: you know what you're doing in your field and are at least confident in your work abilities. I know it's difficult and maybe even preachy: but fuck them all. As long as you are doing your job to the best of your ability, your nose is clean, and you can look back on a day's work with pride: then fuck them. And if it turns out that this ends up going pear shaped: that puts you nicely into a position of strength where you can make demands under the labor laws and maybe even clear out with a nice settlement. In other words: make sure you don't give anybody ammunition.

And listen. Maybe it's not you at all even at your current place of employment. Could just be another wrong fit. It happens. In other words: there's no rule in universe that moving from one shit place to another means that the new place is going to be any different. Maybe it's time, no matter the circumstances or no matter how long you've been at your current place of employment, to start looking again so that you can move again. And hopefully this time around: it'll be a good fit and with decent people. I mention this because I can tell you that these days: job hopping seems to be the norm. The days of staying at a company and staying there long enough to get your gold watch at your retirement party are fucking LONG LONG gone. But that's another discussion for another day (I always wonder who is going to look after these people that have never stayed anywhere long enough to be able to retire without a decent and livable pension because young people, those that I know anyway, couldn't give a fuck about what happens when they get to retirement age i.e. they don't think further than next week) (oddly enough same mistake I made and hence my being able to talk from very bitter and current experience).

Admittedly: there are certain realities too though. Somebody I know bitches and squeals on a daily basis about an EXTREMELY well paying job with a good company. Fuck me. I'd change places NOW. TODAY. But: the reality is that thanks again to this fucking pandemic jobs, not even good jobs, are just about non-existent (well here anyway). So sometimes, unfortunately, one does have to just suck things up. Or end up unemployed. And then take what follows e.g. ending up on the street. Trust me when I tell you that once THOSE dominoes start to fall they fall quick no matter HOW much money or HOW successful you USED to be. And I can also tell you that AGE is a HUGE factor. Without boring anybody with the details: I'm 56 in June. And the chances of me finding formal employment are fuck all to absolutely none. Ironically the main reason why take Alprazolam and Zopiclone at night to sleep! No jokes (and very pertinent to the topic at hand). And I'm a qualified person and with plenty of business experience. Point I'm making: if it's moving around that's required then don't leave it too late. Because it for sure, and as you've noted, does NOT get better the older you get. From a sheer logical point of view: it's in the interest of an employer to employ people that will be around for a while. Doesn't make sense to employ somebody that, due to their age, is going to HAVE to retire in only a few years time. It's a waste of time, money, training, energy, you get the picture.

And once last little nugget and something I also trained myself to do (it's actually an action on your part i.e. it doesn't come naturally). I've been in situations in the past where I've been worried about work and money and all sorts of shit. And one day many years ago I came to the realization: NOTHING is going to happen TONIGHT. There is NOTHING that I can do about things and NOTHING that I can change TONIGHT. Tomorrow and in the day: yes. But TONIGHT, and while I should be sleeping in order to be able to tackle the issues head on the next day, I MUST NOT lie here worrying about shit. It takes a while to acquire the skill. But eventually it comes naturally I assure you!

I have no idea if the above is of any benefit. But I hope it is. Suffice to say and that with all that's going on: unless your meds. are fucking your life up at the moment or resulting in your NOT being able to perform at work and in other aspects of your life then stay with them until you've resolved the other issues. You already know that you're going to have to taper off some day. But I can tell you it'll be a lot easier to do and with little to no fuss if everything else is relatively good. But to try and do it under these circumstances: I think you're just making life more difficult for yourself than it needs to be at the moment.

There is but ONE little caveat to be thrown in here:

Benzodiazepines make it far too easy to become complacent. One thing that their side effects are quite adept at doing is taking away the real urgency of acting to resolve an issue. Obviously it's dosage and usage dependent. Just don't fall into that trap i.e. as noted that's a caveat and something to consider or at very least be aware of and question.

Thanks brother, you actually have said some of the things my new Therapist has told me, about the worrying and people talking about me, you have helped me a lot here my friend and I must say I have to thank Winter666 for this thread, it has been beneficial.

Of topic: @dalpat077 in another thread we were talking about South Africa, and you asked me where in South Africa I was talking about, and I couldn't remember, well thanks to Winter666, he mentioned it on here it was Zimbabwe, that's where those South African representatives were from that we had a contract with, that mentioned having to live on a compound, the lady was beautiful I must say, it was her and two other gentlemen with her that were representatives from their company in Zimbabwe.

Pardon me me going off topic here, but I had to mention it before I forgot again, this lack of sleep has been affecting my memory.

Back on topic now: I'll take my meds they do help, once things get better, then I'll consider tapering off.

 

[LordOfThisWorld]

My bad,last February 12 I tapered it on 10 mg.And from last 14 April, it started to raise again.Tapering Isn't great matter.I already handled much lethal situation like COVID 19 patient with both Hypoferriteanemia including pneumonia. Keep it aside, Matter is that,my tolerance, psychological disturbance, Dosage Ups and Downs.Can't buffered it.That Gives me bad buzz.

You're on 10mg of Alprazolam? Damn and I thought I was going overboard by exceeding my prescribed dosage by 1.5mg.

 

[LordOfThisWorld]

60 mg of Alprazolam?? Okay.... It's 4:40 PM here.I'm gonna take 60 mg at exactly 5:00 PM.Thanks you and Thanks to all.

You have to be kidding me, 60mg of Alprazolam?

 

[LordOfThisWorld]

Yeah I have both alrpazolam (not prescribed just stashed for emergency use) and I have etizolam (of course not presribed here in the US) . I can not tell the difference between these two except when I wake up after alprazolam I can still feel a little groggy. Etizolam wears off cleaner. Like I took nothing the night before. I think the half life is shorter for etizolam. I grew up using diazepam sometimes and that stuff I wake up the next day and half the day I still have grogginess and amnesia.

I also have Etizolam, I'm American as well and this drug is not legal here in the US, why I don't know, it helps taper the Anxiety, I heard it's banned in a lot of countries, this is perplexing to me, why make a medication that is beneficial illegal, if it's legally made and researched?

 

[Jabberwocky]

Rather than having a go at people trying to help you on your thread you’d be better clarifying what dose you are on. That is the question @emkee_reinvented asked.

This thread is derailing. Back to the OP.

@Winter666 if you wanna keep getting support please stick closer to the subject because if the thread goes all over the place and the prices, other substances, sources...are mentioned more than the reason why the thread was created you are putting moderators in an awkward position. The reason why this place is such a valuable source of great information and support is the policy of not allowing anything that could be interpreted as drug seeling/seeking. If that kind of posting was allowed BL would be closed very soon and it certainly couldn't work with such beautiful organizations as MAPS. Here you have regular folks like me, but also people with PhDs, people conducting research in pharmacology, pharmacogenetics, psychology...all giving their information freely and openly. Keeping in mind that this is a harm reduction site will help you to get the best results in these kinds of topics. There are other places on the forum where it is ok to deviate from the main subject. Go into "the lounge" and you can go into multiple directions no matter the main theme of the opening post and it will all be fine. The same rules about pricing and sourcing apply to every forum/subforum though. So to not put moderators and admins in awkward situations please keep closer to the subject. In the end, this kind of thread that is delicate should be kept as coherent and clean as possible - for all the lurkers and members that are acquiring information by just reading without posting. Also, keep in mind that when talking about such a potentially delicate, I could even say dangerous, topic as tapering/stopping very high amount of benzodiazepines we have to be responsible for some future reader. It is a shame when a thread with many great pieces of information based on knowledge and experience gets so derailed that it becomes word/post salad and basically loses its functionality for future readers.

I will once again bring the thread back to OP theme. I believe that you should be dosing with a frequency that you have adjusted already. If you are all over the place then maybe it would be best to take alprazolam 3-4 times a day. Especially while you are adjusting and discovering what is your true lowest dose that keeps you out of the dangerous withdrawal territory. I suggested taking it 4 times daily in dosage closer to 50mg, if that is possible. Because of the sheer volume of alprazolam that you are on you could dose it twice daily. Whatever keeps you stable and out of the seizure territory. That is something you will have to find out for yourself as you are the one actually feeling how a certain dosage impacts you. My opinion would be that the best thing you could do is, as I said, to see if 60mg is keeping you stable. Keep that dosage for at least 2 weeks and then go down in 10% increments. Every 1-2 weeks. After 10 times cutting 60mg you will be in the therapeutic dosage range that the manufacturer of clonazepam has set as the maximum daily dose for seizure disorders. I believe that that should be your target. I am not saying that you should crossover to clonazepam, just giving the arithmetics combined with the goal of getting yourself to a dose that is actually used for therapeutical reasons. Once again, nobody is hating you, being offended personally, or something like that. We are trying to keep the discussion within the boundaries that actually help Bluelight to not just survive but to have so many experts working with Bluelight.

Keep us updated cause we are really interested. If I didn't have an interest in your well-being and was hating you, why would I bring so much energy in writing all this? Keep us informed about your progress here. For other, completely off-topic posts you can go to the lounge or start your own blog. Take care.

 

[Winter666]

Rather than having a go at people trying to help you on your thread you’d be better clarifying what dose you are on. That is the question @emkee_reinvented asked.

This thread is derailing. Back to the OP.

Yes sir,now I'm on 60.00 mg of Alprazolam.120 pills of 0.5 mg of Alprazolam. Brand name I can't say that for some reason.
Are we clear now???

 

[Winter666]

You have to be kidding me, 60mg of Alprazolam?

Kidding me???

 

[Winter666]

@Winter666 if you wanna keep getting support please stick closer to the subject because if the thread goes all over the place and the prices, other substances, sources...are mentioned more than the reason why the thread was created you are putting moderators in an awkward position. The reason why this place is such a valuable source of great information and support is the policy of not allowing anything that could be interpreted as drug seeling/seeking. If that kind of posting was allowed BL would be closed very soon and it certainly couldn't work with such beautiful organizations as MAPS. Here you have regular folks like me, but also people with PhDs, people conducting research in pharmacology, pharmacogenetics, psychology...all giving their information freely and openly. Keeping in mind that this is a harm reduction site will help you to get the best results in these kinds of topics. There are other places on the forum where it is ok to deviate from the main subject. Go into "the lounge" and you can go into multiple directions no matter the main theme of the opening post and it will all be fine. The same rules about pricing and sourcing apply to every forum/subforum though. So to not put moderators and admins in awkward situations please keep closer to the subject. In the end, this kind of thread that is delicate should be kept as coherent and clean as possible - for all the lurkers and members that are acquiring information by just reading without posting. Also, keep in mind that when talking about such a potentially delicate, I could even say dangerous, topic as tapering/stopping very high amount of benzodiazepines we have to be responsible for some future reader. It is a shame when a thread with many great pieces of information based on knowledge and experience gets so derailed that it becomes word/post salad and basically loses its functionality for future readers.

I will once again bring the thread back to OP theme. I believe that you should be dosing with a frequency that you have adjusted already. If you are all over the place then maybe it would be best to take alprazolam 3-4 times a day. Especially while you are adjusting and discovering what is your true lowest dose that keeps you out of the dangerous withdrawal territory. I suggested taking it 4 times daily in dosage closer to 50mg, if that is possible. Because of the sheer volume of alprazolam that you are on you could dose it twice daily. Whatever keeps you stable and out of the seizure territory. That is something you will have to find out for yourself as you are the one actually feeling how a certain dosage impacts you. My opinion would be that the best thing you could do is, as I said, to see if 60mg is keeping you stable. Keep that dosage for at least 2 weeks and then go down in 10% increments. Every 1-2 weeks. After 10 times cutting 60mg you will be in the therapeutic dosage range that the manufacturer of clonazepam has set as the maximum daily dose for seizure disorders. I believe that that should be your target. I am not saying that you should crossover to clonazepam, just giving the arithmetics combined with the goal of getting yourself to a dose that is actually used for therapeutical reasons. Once again, nobody is hating you, being offended personally, or something like that. We are trying to keep the discussion within the boundaries that actually help Bluelight to not just survive but to have so many experts working with Bluelight.

Keep us updated cause we are really interested. If I didn't have an interest in your well-being and was hating you, why would I bring so much energy in writing all this? Keep us informed about your progress here. For other, completely off-topic posts you can go to the lounge or start your own blog. Take care.

But I'm some kind of confused about your Zimbabwe or South Africa? Phd....?
We were on a normal conversation.

 

[Jabberwocky]

Just take your daily dose of alprazolam and stabilise. Things will get lot clearer once you do. You will come to understand what I meant when invoking MAPS, PhDs, researchers and Bluelights connection with them. Take it easy and try to get in the flow of Thể Thao...I mean Bluelight.

Here are few links to subforums that could interest you:

MAPS.org

A forum dedicated to MAPS, its work, history, strategy, public service goals and events organized or sponsored by the organization. The forum also discusses clinical and scientific research into the beneficial uses and risks of psychedelics and marijuana

www.bluelight.org

Drug Studies

A place for researchers and forum regulars to come together. We welcome researchers with independently-approved drug research projects for participant recruitment, dissemination of findings and open dialogue

www.bluelight.org

Neuroscience and Pharmacology Discussion

Discussion of journal articles, drug science and other theoretical topics

www.bluelight.org

Stabilise, get familiar with BLs flow and rules, post some funny things in the lounge (www.bluelight.org/xf/forums/the-lounge.291/) and have patience. Both for yourself and others. Give yourself some time and just try to get the basics of stabilisation. It will all come together if you are determined with both tapering and taking this forum sincerely.

 

[LordOfThisWorld]

Kidding me???

Yes like joking, 60mg sounds like a lot to me.

 

[Jabberwocky]

I sense a quite a language barrier. It's odd. But hey, scientific literature is also available in French, German, Spanish... So maybe it's that...

 

[dalpat077]

@Winter666.

Apologies for my absence. But which is a good point. Don't go thinking because somebody comes along here, dumps all over you, and then doesn't post that they've forgotten about you. Sometimes people have their own unexpected shit to deal with. That doesn't mean that in their absence they don't give a shit. And should not become a reason for you to become discouraged either. That said: there will indeed come a point where this thread will fade into the background, as threads do, and you're going to have to continue, mostly, on your own. Hopefully by then you're in a good place, will feel proud of what you're accomplished by that point, and have the strength to continue to taper off until you're done i.e. you're own sense of achievement. You may even feel "well fuck them all: I'm going finish this in spite of anything and everyone" by that time.

The above being said and based on the latest posts: looks like you're in very good hands here my Bangladeshi friend.

There is just one thing that I think needs to be made very clear here. And this for lurkers or for those who tend to cherry pick posts.

Nobody is recommending a dosage here. Not at all. It's simple: the OP seems to have standardized (for better or for worse and for want of a better term) on 60mg per day. I assume with occasional binges upwards of that. All that's being said here is that if that is what the OP can live with or has been living with, roughly, for the past four and half years, then that's what they need to stay on and, in this case, for the next week. The dosages mentioned here are in no way recommended dosages at all i.e. they are particular to the OP and his problem. So if anybody reads this: see the details in context. If somebody reads this or is a lurker and finds this beneficial: then it's your dosage that's important for the next week. It could be 5mg. Or it could be 2mg. Whatever is going to be comfortable for the next week. And none of the information on this thread should be perceived as an EXCUSE to start taking this shit or more of it.

I know the above has been addressed already (saw it yesterday). But it's been bugging me. I can just see somebody coming along, not reading the entire thread, not getting the message, looking at all of this, and then thinking "oh well no problem: it's alright to bang 50mg" and go from there. That's not the message nor the purpose of this thread.

Yes sir,now I'm on 60.00 mg of Alprazolam.120 pills of 0.5 mg of Alprazolam. Brand name I can't say that for some reason.
Are we clear now???

Right! Sunday afternoon here. Sunday evening in Bangladesh! Tonight is your last night on whatever dosage you've been taking daily thus far. So enjoy.

From tomorrow: you're on 60mg daily! No more, no less. Until next Monday! We got a deal?

Only exception is if you start feeling withdrawals. At which point you post here FIRST i.e. don't just go throwing your hands up in disgust and thinking fuck this and go bang another 40mg!

For what it's worth: you got more people supporting you on this thread and wishing you well than most in your situation. And while the purists may disagree with me: at this stage of your Alprazolam career you're in better hands than you would be with some medical professionals and who may not understand, or may not give a shit about, benzodiazepine dependence and withdrawal.

Holding thumbs for you my Bangladeshi friend!

 

[Nurse Ratched]

@Winter666.

Apologies for my absence. But which is a good point. Don't go thinking because somebody comes along here, dumps all over you, and then doesn't post that they've forgotten about you. Sometimes people have their own unexpected shit to deal with. That doesn't mean that in their absence they don't give a shit. And should not become a reason for you to become discouraged either. That said: there will indeed come a point where this thread will fade into the background, as threads do, and you're going to have to continue, mostly, on your own. Hopefully by then you're in a good place, will feel proud of what you're accomplished by that point, and have the strength to continue to taper off until you're done i.e. you're own sense of achievement. You may even feel "well fuck them all: I'm going finish this in spite of anything and everyone" by that time.

The above being said and based on the latest posts: looks like you're in very good hands here my Bangladeshi friend.

There is just one thing that I think needs to be made very clear here. And this for lurkers or for those who tend to cherry pick posts.

Nobody is recommending a dosage here. Not at all. It's simple: the OP seems to have standardized (for better or for worse and for want of a better term) on 60mg per day. I assume with occasional binges upwards of that. All that's being said here is that if that is what the OP can live with or has been living with, roughly, for the past four and half years, then that's what they need to stay on and, in this case, for the next week. The dosages mentioned here are in no way recommended dosages at all i.e. they are particular to the OP and his problem. So if anybody reads this: see the details in context. If somebody reads this or is a lurker and finds this beneficial: then it's your dosage that's important for the next week. It could be 5mg. Or it could be 2mg. Whatever is going to be comfortable for the next week. And none of the information on this thread should be perceived as an EXCUSE to start taking this shit or more of it.

I know the above has been addressed already (saw it yesterday). But it's been bugging me. I can just see somebody coming along, not reading the entire thread, not getting the message, looking at all of this, and then thinking "oh well no problem: it's alright to bang 50mg" and go from there. That's not the message nor the purpose of this thread.



Right! Sunday afternoon here. Sunday evening in Bangladesh! Tonight is your last night on whatever dosage you've been taking daily thus far. So enjoy.

From tomorrow: you're on 60mg daily! No more, no less. Until next Monday! We got a deal?

Only exception is if you start feeling withdrawals. At which point you post here FIRST i.e. don't just go throwing your hands up in disgust and thinking fuck this and go bang another 40mg!

For what it's worth: you got more people supporting you on this thread and wishing you well than most in your situation. And while the purists may disagree with me: at this stage of your Alprazolam career you're in better hands than you would be with some medical professionals and who may not understand, or may not give a shit about, benzodiazepine dependence and withdrawal.

Holding thumbs for you my Bangladeshi friend!

We can only hope. God knows you have been the voice of reason here. A couple others as well but I believe you have the most knowledge and experience with this particular benzo.

Man I would love to go off of BL for a couple months and then come back and read that OP was down to say, 20 mgs a day or lower, and was tapering successfully. That would be the bomb. Just not on this thread but on so many others where they are struggling bad.

Enjoy your Sunday

 

[dalpat077]

We can only hope. God knows you have been the voice of reason here. A couple others as well but I believe you have the most knowledge and experience with this particular benzo.

Man I would love to go off of BL for a couple months and then come back and read that OP was down to say, 20 mgs a day or lower, and was tapering successfully. That would be the bomb. Just not on this thread but on so many others where they are struggling bad.

Enjoy your Sunday

Thanks.

Truth? There’s a part of me that’s hoping that this logic and support and input given by all here could be taken up, even by those that are too shy to post or just lurking, by users of most all substances with the exception of Heroin and Alcohol. And of course: speaking purely of recreational use and physical dependence that could have ended up being the result. Not speaking of substances that are necessary for treatment of medical conditions.

But, sometimes, the time or circumstances are just not right maybe? Dunno. I mean: it doesn’t help if your sober life is a bigger hell let’s face it. Or does the one feed on the other? Chicken or the egg first? But that’s why addiction ain’t that simple I guess. Doesn’t help getting sober and then jumping under a bus because reality is so shit let’s face it. That’s why, in my opinion anyway, there needs to be a holistic approach in most cases. And maybe something like this forms a part of said holistic approach. Anonymous, non-judgmental, and doesn’t put somebody in a system with records that will follow them around forever like a shit-rag (sometimes that comes with its own shit and that will outlive the addiction issue that’s then become a thing of the past).

Anyway. Whatever the case: always makes things better and easier to have someone in your corner no matter what. That’s why I noted the other day on that other thread that I’m surprised that no more threads such as this exist.

Grandiose? Maybe. Ill informed about (some) other substances? Maybe. Well meaning. Definitely.

And by the way: no shit from the Cocaine fraternity! This doesn’t apply to you. When you’re ready: you get your head out of your backside and call it a day. Two decades, at least, qualifies me to make that statement! But until then call 555…….!

 

[Jabberwocky]

And by the way: no shit from the Cocaine fraternity! This doesn’t apply to you. When you’re ready: you get your head out of your backside and call it a day. Two decades, at least, qualifies me to make that statement! But until then call 555…….!

Not a great input from me but ->

So true!

 

[LordOfThisWorld]

I tried like crazy this weekend not to take any Benzos, but my body and mind just wouldn't allow it, between the klonopin, etizolam, and xanax I took a combined 4.5mg all together, plus a couple of somas, I spent the entire weekend laying on the couch depressed and anxious.

I'm trying not to buy the extra benzos online, as they are expensive as shit.

@Winter666 I hope and pray you cut your intake down, that sounds like a lot of Xanax to be on,you might need to seek professional help to taper off.