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Mental Health Mental Illness Support Thread V. How do you feel?

Existential crisis at 25. Feeling pretty depressed. I cant stop thinking that people who bullied me back in the day were right after all.
 
Yeah I thought about it. Been alone for too long period of a time now with only short stays at my dealers place which as you know can be bad.
 
Also, people can change, man.

Nothing is set in stone.

Yeah isolation + drugs usually makes me a bit.. off kilter. It's comforting because i am used to it. but sometimes we need to get out of our comfort zone to develop.
 
My comfort zone is being alone or with another crazy person. Thats it. Though I applied to work and will go to school in fall if I dont get a work just so I can continue "living" and improving.
 
I get along with a lot of people typically, but as you said, feel most comfortable around people who are outcasts.

It takes a lot of effort for me to keep up with most people.
 
The way I see it, any talk with a stranger is small talk. It has no substance and is just boring. So its the same for me.

Id much rather talk about the meaning of things or just some next level craziness.
 
Yeah that's true.

Yeah man like when i get comfortable with people and start talking, if you don't know me you're going to think WTF is this kid on.

I'm very nonchalant and quiet to the point of creepy at first, then morph into a sadistic little child with attention problems.
 
All over the place today, my head doesn't seem to be able to work out whether it's calm and happy or anxious and sad.
 
I’m feeling exhausted today, literally exhausted from doing nothing. Mentally exhausted! I need to be beside the sea to get some salt air into the lungs.
My startle reflex is high for some odd reason too and even laughing causes me slight anxiety. Think I’ll take 6mg diazepam to calm myself down.
Hope everyone else is doing good!
 
schizopath said:
Existential crisis at 25. Feeling pretty depressed. I cant stop thinking that people who bullied me back in the day were right after all.
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No one deserves to be bullied. But I understand it's not your rationale, but your inert, undesired feeling that broke into your Inland Empire. Self-reproach probably ties into your habitual amphetamine use. In any case, the mind is always focused on something. It might as well be positive thoughts. But you're just gonna keep up your amphetamine abuse so it's nigh impossible.

Tell me, are you able to obey yourself? Are you able to have the strength to start commanding God so that he obey's you?
 
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