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Mental Health Coming Off Invega Sustenna (Paliperidone) v.2

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No longer waking up with dry mouth. It's been a long hard road and I've thought many times that I was already healed, but it's hard coming off... and difficult to say where you are along the stages. Hang in there everyone and don't give up hope.
 
Hi,

I'm Narshe81, the original poster of the old Coming off Invega Sustenna thread. I was misdiagnosed with schizophrenia back late 2012 early 2013 and was forced to take Invega Sustenna injections for close to a year. I have been off all meds since 2013 and have been posting for a while, updating my recovery progress over the years. I was absent for a while from the forums because I was too sick/ill to bother coming online anymore. My condition has not improved. I'm suffering everyday. I don't even feel like writing anything right now, but it's just been too much for me. Anhedonia has not improved. I find no pleasure in life. My writing, speaking, socializing skills are gone. I am no longer human. Each day I suffer in silence and I feel tortured/restless/anxious 24/7. Each minute feels like an hour. I have lost all my friends and my family has abandoned me.

It's May 2-17 now... Been almost 5 years off Invega Sustenna from a misdiagnose and I have not recovered. The only thing improved were that I feel less of the inner torment was I used to feel back when I was still on the injection. Aside from that, my life has no meaning. I am angry and bitter at psychiatry and all its lies. The doctor who told me that this drug was new and that there was no side effects. I want him to go through what he put me through. I hope that he would suffer the same way he made me suffer. He lied to me and took no responsibilities for it after.

I want to kill myself but I am too scared. I really want it all to end. I feel no pleasure, I no longer feel hungry, sleepy, content, satisfied, etc. I have not felt 'pleasure' of euphoric for the past 5 years almost after this drug. Why is it that there is nothing we can do? We can't even sue them? The drugs made us so docile and took away our energies to make a fuss. Most of us just end up sitting back and suffer while they make shit tons of money off these horrible drugs. Fuck psychiatry and its lies. I want my life back.

What can do I now 5 years after this drug and still not recovered? I don't even feel hungry anymore. I don't enjoy food. Each second is torment. It's hard for me to explain in words now what or how I feel. My intelligent level has dropped a lot. I'm a university grad with 3.6 GPA and now I can't even write a proper sentence or finish my thought. I have no interests and hobbies now. Everything that I used to enjoy are all nothing now. I have no desire for anything. Each day is just trying to survive until bed time just so I can force myself to fall asleep eventhough I don't even feel sleepy or rested after.

I have nothing left. I don't want to live.
 
I'm starting to believe the solution to invega/risperdal permanent anhedonia problem is with dopamine releasing agents. people who really have schiz positive symptoms are not recommended to use them.
 
When I was first injected by this stuff I was so scared because it was a new med and I couldn't find much info about it much online. I made several threads including this one in order to find answers as to what was going on with me. Imagine how I feel when I come back and check almost 5 years down the road and see thousands of other posts from people suffering from Invega Sustenna as well. Now it's different than back then. Now I can find all kinds of nasty info about invega sustenna now after the drug has been out for a while. A quick google will tell you want I mean.

This is so wrong. I was lied to. The asshole doctor said it was a new drug and that it had NO side effects unlike the older typical APs. Lies. Two weeks after the initial injection I have suffered from anhedonia ever since. I can't think properly now. I'm on disability and can't bring myself to do anything. I don't know what else to say. This is all too much. I don't want to commit suicide, but I really don't see a point in living if I can't recover.

Weed, cigarettes, alcohols, and all the things that gives pleasure still do nothing for me. I just want to be able to enjoy weed once a while again. Even cigarettes just taste like air to me and does nothing still.

This is the worst form of torture I have ever endured.
 
Sorry to hear that Narshe. We probably wouldn't have each other now to commune with if it wasn't for you.

I regret to announce my days on here as well as the net in general may be coming to a close. I have been noticing some weird goings ons with my arms, especially left arm. In 2007 I was diagnosed with paranoid schizophrenia and prescribed Geodon. Besides making me sleep 12 hours the medication kind of acted like a sort of cast for my left arm. I would time and time again find myself reaching to the skies at night with only that one arm... unable to fall asleep until the Geodon kicked in. At times it's seemed like my left arm, I have no control of. Poisons over the years have made this worse, to the point I'm at now...

Time is shortening for the invega. Perhaps I overdid it with psychedelics because there is a portion that is breaking through the ice, so to speak. Invega's hold on me is loosening, but with that come certain symptoms that awake a nameless fear in my heart. I feel the loosening of it's grasp on my arms. I suppose the energies I'm seeing associated with this lately are due to my senses like feeling improving around my arms. This makes sense in a way because the injections went straight into my deltoids... alternating each month from right to left. But as of late I am losing control of my left arm. It obeys me, because as a shaman, I keep my demons under control. However I can only control it so much. Do not ever let the ally control you. Fight them if you have to.
 
Invega ( Xeplion ) and its big brother Risperidone are devil medications. THey are highly potent and block Dopamine2 receptor nearly as potent as Haloperidol. But you can trust. While your receptors are blocked, they upregulate. So when this shit pharmaceutical crap is out of your body your will feel dopamine way stronger !
 
I want to die. But I think the odds of surviving tetraplegic from a 10th floor jump is too damm high

Would not reach terminal velocity. And i lost acces to the only possible firearm. Dammit
 
Anyx said:
But you can trust. While your receptors are blocked, they upregulate. So when this shit pharmaceutical crap is out of your body your will feel dopamine way stronger !
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GREAT POST ^

I can 100% confirm this happens - Imagine how good you felt before the antipsychotic "treatment" then multiply it by 2. The result is how good you will feel once detoxed from the poison. It all comes back, stronger than before.

The trick is obviously to stop taking all forms of pharmaceutical poisons, & give it time. Using natural remedies will speed the process up - vegan diets, reishi mushroom, gotu kola, damiana, etc. Find an alternative healer you trust (ayurveda/TCM is a good place to start), who understands your history and can prescribe herbs/supplements accordingly. Did wonders for me.
 
^ That's quite an update from your older posts. Glad you're feeling better. Damiana helped me through a lot of the Invega-related anxiety I was dealing with for a while. Now whenever I get an anxiety attack they are much more manageable and I pretty much just... accept what's going on, tell myself it's just anxiety and that I'll live through it and then blast my music or whatever. It's like Ben Afflek's character from The Accountant. Sometimes the best way to treat an issue that makes you panic is to turn up the music.
 
An excellent suggestion, poisoned_veins!

I was going to post this as it's own thread, but I decided to maybe have some of you guys take a look at it instead... I know the moderators would probably chew up my asshole if they saw me posting this more... publicly. Anyway, here goes:

The real reason for abuse... it's simpler than people might think. There's a darkness in all of us. Some philosophers suggest that all of our wants and needs can never be fully satisfied, but I digress.

To understand abuse, you need look no farther than just at yourself. Take a long hard look, in fact. Ever had a moment, like crossing a bridge with a friend or acquaintance and you suddenly got the urge to push them off? Ever taken care of an animal and there was something about it that just irked you... a need to dominate and be a bully overpowered your otherwise greater judgment (assuming that ever had it)?

The real reason for abuse is that people don't look inside themselves for two fucking seconds and ask, "Why am I having this thought?" The reason for abuse happening is that people don't want to discover, uncover, or fix the flaws and shortcomings... face the underlying issue.

If you know anything about schizo disorders, you're probably aware of the statistics: people with a schizo diagnosis are far more likely to be the victims of abuse than to abuse people. Isn't this statistic a little rambunctious - as if to call out and say "Wait a minute, this is fucked!"? In order to understand why this is, the work for that is up to you. But psychiatry is a cult, John Lennon was killed by it, and you'll never understand the difference if you don't face it. The difference of what if I didn't do that vs. I just pushed that guy off a roof.

I mean, isn't it obvious something is pathetically and morbidly wrong with the mental health field when we look at things this way? The history of mental health in and of itself is FUCKED! I'm not saying do away with it altogether. I'm saying, MY GOD! It's fucked. It's absolutely fucked. It's absolutely, almost totally, literally and somewhat more figuratively fucked. Try going into another mental hospital or even doctor's office knowing what I have just described... knowing that the reason they are treating you is not because they want to help - I mean, they do... they really really do - but because, as people, they probably never worked out their own issues well enough and thus are treating you or someone you love with an insatiable need to cause irreparable harm.

Granted my theories here are a bit unwarranted and I know exactly what others might say: but let's take a further, deeper look into the mental health field.

The program, as it is, in the United States is clearly imperfect. No one is telling us that it is... perfect. We've got a system of diagnosing, prescribing, and prevention of 'relapse' or 'psychosis' or what-have-you. Now... I said no one is telling you it's perfect. That's bullshit. They are. The lack of flexibility in this war on the mentally ill has a tell. It has a fiber. In that fiber, in that tell, is the essence of hell.
 
HiddenSpectrum said:
It's been about 6 months since my last shot of dumb-me-down. And I am thankful to say I am 100% healed, more than 100% healed. I feel amazing. Anhedonia? Gone. Sexual dysfunction? Gone. Brain fog has disappeared. Ability to get high and drunk is back. I got completely plastered last weekend. However, I quit weed.

Quitting cannabis was the final step in my recovery. Once the cannabis left my system, I felt like a new man. I did a little research and found out that cannabis can exacerbate anhedonia and feelings of emptiness. And that was me. I was getting a slight high, but more than anything, my feelings of emptiness and anhedonia would return in full force. I started to notice that the longer I went without weed, the better I felt. But it was hard to stop. Weed is a double-edged sword. It helps to slightly alleviate the symptoms of Invega in the beginning, but after the poison starts to die down, your brain still falls back into that dark place because your dopamine receptors will never recover if you're constantly bombarding your brain with endocannabinoids. As far as the brain is concerned it has plenty of dopamine stimulation through the cannabis, why increase the receptors.

I bought a lot of supplements but ended up not taking them. What really helped me was forcing myself into the gym. I now do 20 minutes of cardio 5 days a week. And after healing, I added in weight lifting. I look and feel incredible. My muscle definition is better than its been in 7 years. I went from weighing 169lbs back to my normal weight of 145lbs. I also established a better sleep routine and diet. A healthy diet full of fruits, vegetables, and plant-based proteins does wonders for the body and brain.

Last night I was so excited and giddy over nothing but life. I talked like crazy to someone that I am actually dating. Yep, I'm also back into the social scene. My words finally flow and my conversational wit has returned.

My advice to anyone wishing to follow the same path is to just relax in the beginning and let the medication run its course. Veg out to something. For me it was Youtube gaming live streams. After about 2 months of being clean, force yourself to do cardio and STAY CLEAR OF ANY RECREATIONAL DRUGS. Cardio will clear the poison out of your system quickly, 20 minutes of intense cardio 5 days a week. If you can't do 20 minutes, start at 10. If you can't do 10 minutes start at 5 minutes. And if that is not possible, just do 1 minute of cardio and push yourself for as long as possible. I remember just how tough it was, and I know it's not easy. But if you just sit around waiting for your brain to kick itself back into high gear, you're going to be waiting for a long time. .
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How was your sexual dysfunction? Was it strong? Cumming just water or nothing? Not even erections? From what did you recover?
 
Did you let go all of your "guilty pleasures" even now that you are recovered? If so, whats the point?

I cant see why recovering if I am supossed to keep without doing what I like, which envolved all the pleasures you said. Right now, I am not doing any of that.

Did you have insomnia?

I dont want to exercise or eat healthy foods. I think thats bullshit for recovering.
 
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Hello everyone. I am glad to hear about another recovery story, congratulations! I am still pretty far from recovered, but I hope it happens fast. I hope I get that "woke up one day feeling much better and over the next two weeks improved greatly every day." I have heard several stories like that and I hope I am one. In about 3 weeks will mark my 8th month off. I have heard of several recovering in that timeframe of 8-10 months so I hope I am one and I hope I start improving rapidly. I am going to attempt to fast 4 or 5 days so my body will enter ketosis. I heard it can help detox your body as when you are in that state your body uses toxins and gets rid of things you don't need first. So I hope that can kickstart my recovery. I will update you all and let you know if it is helping.
 
Hey board, I haven't posted in a while and figured I'd check in. At 8 monthes off 2 injections, life is opening up and getting smoother. I am in less discomfort but feeling greater anxiety. I am feeling like eating better and walking/running ~2 hours per day. (I don't know how these guys do extreme exercise, I swear I'm trying) I want to give a real push to lose the weight and regain my body shape but I often lose motivation. I was in bad shape last month but just made it a point to get better every day no matter how despondent I was. I swear I was healthy before these injections, they really devastated my health, body, and mental wellness. So, I began to make it a point to wake up early as I can and then take a digestive called Triphala then take a long shower. This gets my stomach machinery working and clears out my GI tract. I felt like my metabolism was not responsive and I was always constipated. So, this ritual became my thing, and it continues to this day. Also, I began making it a sure thing to go for a walk every day. I needed to get my blood flowing again and to regain muscle tone. These two rituals have improved things rapidly and I feel much more human than I did a month ago. I stopped drinking beer. Finally, I have a 5 pound bag of an algae called spirulina to make smoothies with. This will be much of my diet from now on. It is detoxifying and provides energy. I take copious amounts of Omega-3 phish oil and I have astaxanthin on the way. My only other supplement is adrenal start-up from Gaia that has rhodiola rosea cordyceps and some others.My opinions is that stimulants provide temporary relief, then make things worse. My strategy is to follow a regimen of health first - diet , fresh air and exercise - - to prepare for the healing. I will save any invega bashing because we all need to focus on getting better. Wish you all the best in getting better
 
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nnnbbvvv said:
Hey board, I haven't posted in a while and figured I'd check in. At 8 monthes off 2 injections, life is opening up and getting smoother. I am in less discomfort but feeling greater anxiety. I am feeling like eating better and walking/running ~2 hours per day. (I don't know how these guys do extreme exercise, I swear I'm trying) I want to give a real push to lose the weight and regain my body shape but I often lose motivation. I was in bad shape last month but just made it a point to get better every day no matter how despondent I was. I swear I was healthy before these injections, they really devastated my health, body, and mental wellness. So, I began to make it a point to wake up early as I can and then take a digestive called Triphala then take a long shower. This gets my stomach machinery working and clears out my GI tract. I felt like my metabolism was not responsive and I was always constipated. So, this ritual became my thing, and it continues to this day. Also, I began making it a sure thing to go for a walk every day. I needed to get my blood flowing again and to regain muscle tone. These two rituals have improved things rapidly and I feel much more human than I did a month ago. I stopped drinking beer. Finally, I have a 5 pound bag of an algae called spirulina to make smoothies with. This will be much of my diet from now on. It is detoxifying and provides energy. I take copious amounts of Omega-3 phish oil and I have astaxanthin on the way. My only other supplement is adrenal start-up from Gaia that has rhodiola rosea cordyceps and some others.My opinions is that stimulants provide temporary relief, then make things worse. I plan on employing ibogaine to retune my brain. I will share the results. I believe that it is a promising solution. My theory is that if it can retune the neuropathways of hardcore addicts, it will provide atleast some relief for our supersensitivity/oversaturation problem. It is possible I will be miraculously healed. This will mean starting increasing microdoses leading to an eventual flood dosage. Save the psychedelic/psychosis contradiction comment. I do/did not have psychosis, and I have an injury which needs addressing. My strategy is to follow a regimen of health first - diet , fresh air and exercise - - to prepare for the healing. I will save an invega bashing but because we all need to focus on getting better. Wish you all the best in getting better
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Hello mate, welcome back :)
BE VERY CAREFUL WITH IBOGAINE!!!! AFAIK, it is one of the most potent psychedelics on earth! I've smoked DMT (Ayahuasca) - which is the sister to Iboga - on antipsychotics, & didn't have a great time! Just made me feel sick in realising what i've become, tbh. Definitely interested to hear how it goes for you though, I've read good results from Ibogaine following antipsychotic treatment.

The supplement stack you're on sounds great - give it time man. If you can find a herb called damiana, it might be worthwhile to try. It improves my anxiety almost instantly, and I feel huge relief in my intestinal tract (which, IMO, is THE place to focus healing efforts on).

Props to you for being able to stomach spirulina! That stuff is gnarly makes me gag! Real good for you though :)

Best wishes to you too!

iridescentblack said:
^ That's quite an update from your older posts. Glad you're feeling better. Damiana helped me through a lot of the Invega-related anxiety I was dealing with for a while. Now whenever I get an anxiety attack they are much more manageable and I pretty much just... accept what's going on, tell myself it's just anxiety and that I'll live through it and then blast my music or whatever. It's like Ben Afflek's character from The Accountant. Sometimes the best way to treat an issue that makes you panic is to turn up the music.
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Thanks :^) I'm doing well.. considering I'm on 8 pills a day and a monthly injection, haha :) When I was in hospital, the nurses told my family that "the amount of medication we are giving ZombieMode should be enough to knock a horse out"... guess I've become immune to the shit. How have you been, Iridescent?
 
Thanks , good to hear from u zombie i thought i read you'd tried ibogaine? I will be very careful, small bits until I'm comfortable. I have been off APs for almost 9 monthes so there is no mixing. I can't believe you smoked DMT on APs. They block the Sigma 2 receptor which prevents DMT from doing anything. How do they keep getting you on APs??!



I will try daimiana
 
Well it's been about a year since I've posted here and about 2 years since I've requested my doctor to taper me off Invega pill form and he still refuses unless I meet his requirements. His requirement is that I land a job(which I've been trying to find even before seeing him) and I'm trying to explain to him that it would be safer if I did it before I found a job because if I have a night of no sleep( I have severe sleep problems) it could lead to absence from work and getting fired or sticking it out at work with no sleep and risking onset of psychosis from sleep deprivation. His answer? That shows that I'm not ready to come off the medication if I can't handle the stress of a job. To him, being unemployed and having an opportunity to recover in the safety of your home is a cop out and if I didn't have family to provide shelter I wouldn't have the option. It's driving me mad that he is always condescending and finding the argument for everything I throw at him. He doesn't even believe in withdrawal paychosis being seperate from psychosis brought on from the illness.

So anway I was wondering if anyone here has gotten off the pill form and is feeling better and how long it's been.

I'm on 3 mg of the pill now but my doc won't bring me down to 1.5mg. I tried tapering off when I was on 9mg at one pill every other day the every three days and it was unbearable and I went back on it. I'm wondering if the 1.5 mg pill (the lowest dosage available) would make a difference.

I would fucking love if he'd put me on risperidone so I can cut the pills in half and later thirds but he refuses. He'd rather me go through withdrawal and relapse then help supervise my taper.

Please can someone help?
 
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LookingForSelf said:
He doesn't even believe in withdrawal paychosis being seperate from psychosis brought on from the illness.
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This has been one of the many things that really pisses me off since the beginning. They will never admit it too since that would make them appear incompetent. It's all a scam built on lies upon lies. The more you study and do more research about this subject, the more you realize what bullshit this whole pharmaceutical industry and psychiatry really are.
 
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