the lounge discussion v. september 2016

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My mistake SKL, it seemed like you were using his post as an example of the "shit posting" that would not be tolerated in this thread.. My reading comprehension skills seem to be off today.
 
going back through the thread... seen phr say a few times "well all current loungers are okay with things, or else they'd leave." what about all the people that DID leave after you were put in charge?

it's not because they're sensitive special little snowflakes, its not because they can't take a good ribbing, its because you have done everything in your power to make the lounge a place they didn't want to be in anymore. you made it your own little playground.
 
at some point the lounge changed from a place to give people a playful ribbing, and started being a place to take out aggression. it stopped being mean funny and just started being mean.
 
Let's be clear, the problems go deeper than phrozen's "sociopathic" tendencies. I get what you're saying Chaz but the idea that the issues with the lounge fall solely onto phrozen is silly and reductive.
 
it is a *huge* part of it. he has quite obviously made it his mission to drive away people he doesn't like. many of them being well-liked and appreciated posters.

idk how many people have asked me to start lounging again. at least a dozen, if not more. multiply that by all the other good posters that have been driven away, and it is clear to see how the quality of the lounge has gone down a lot.

and again, this is not me being unable to take a joke. this is me being harassed every time i post anywhere in the lounge, often with the harassment qualified by saying "and i'm not even trying to be funny, i seriously think you're pathetic."

tho, like phr said, we have different opinions on what "pathetic" is.
 
Bearlove said:
There are several social threads around the section that these people so desperate to chat could have chosen. There was absolutely no reason to derail this thread, start posting memes etc but I think that this attitude (knowing they are derailing a thread, knowing they are posting in the wrong thread) is one of the problems already highlighted.
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But this is where my friends are posting
 
I agree with TNW. phr has been objective in the past but his bias towards the posters he hates is very blatant and I think that's part of the problem. the guy as many have said feeds on hate and it in itself is pathetic. a lounge where many do not like the moderator can never be progressive.

I whole heartedly believe he is a big factor in this.

of course he isn't the only problem but as has been mentioned, senior staff overlooking the lounge that are also disliked by many lounge regulars can never be progressive.

it is of my opinion that the mod/Smod team along with the guidlines should be refurbished to allow consistent objectivity rather than the blatant subjective dealings I've seen.

the mod/Smod team being lounge regulars is a must imo.

but I haven't really been around that long but these are things I've noticed over the last several months.

when I first started I thought it was mainly about hurling abuse. eventually I realized it was way more about social discussion and as of late I've turned down the abuse but in some instances, I figure abusing someone can maybe steer them in the right path. constructive criticism is how I'd view it.
 
B;anl said:
of course he isn't the only problem but as has been mentioned, senior staff overlooking the lounge that are also disliked by many lounge regulars can never be progressive.

it is of my opinion that the mod/Smod team along with the guidlines should be refurbished to allow consistent objectivity rather than the blatant subjective dealings I've seen.

the mod/Smod team being lounge regulars is a must imo.
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the fact that most of the senior staff aren't lounge regulars is a big part of why he's been able to get away with it for so long. when people complain about him, he can always just say "well they don't like me / they have a problem with authority," and since that conversation happens behind closed doors, the people making the complaints don't have the opportunity to present evidence that he is in fact unfairly biased against people he doesn't like.
 
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imo, this area of staff should be voted on by the community rather than handpicked by current mods.

we should put the polls to good use and vote off mods/Smods imo. a collective decision will likely be more effective.

thats my suggestion in that regard.
the rules will be more tricky and maybe shouldn't be left to the community to decide for obvious reasons. ex-staff and current maybe can be employed for this as has been suggested above.

that'll be all from me.
 
phr said:
They won't do this, simply because it takes a double pair of tude sized TNW's to go head to head with the cesspool of offensive material that TL is.
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I, for the life of me, can't decipher what exactly you were trying to say here. If I'm going to be used as a metaphor, it'd be nice to be legible.

zephyr said:
Annie, Tude and BP are all good mods. They are sassy and funny. I read Annies post and Tude seems to feel the same way that their opinions dont matter.

They are being drowned out by their colleague unfortunately.

But honestly the other 3 mods are great. Their opinion does matter and for what its worth - I read pretty much every post they make and have a laugh.

I just wish they made more and didnt hold back.


Back in da day, the lounge mods at the time were the biggest postwhores statistically.

So post more you three! Entertain us with the funny!
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Thank you very much for your kind words. I do try to be welcoming to people. There's several people I've pm'd after posting once in TL, telling them to stick around, etc. Some people do stay, some leave. C'est la vie.

I will say it still feels like my opinion doesn't matter. I made a suggestion early on in this thread and not once did a senior mod or admin address it. Regardless, I'll stick around and enforce rules, whether or not I agree with them. I'll try to be fair to everyone, and continue to try being welcoming.
 
Bomboclat said:
Phrozen you'd run the lounge into the ground just to prove a point. Nothing against you personally, and I think you haven't been a bad moderator taking into consideration the many mods we've had over the years, but your stubborn behavior is not going to help the lounge here.

I propose a solution:

- make the lounge public again; require greenlighters to reach bluelighter status prior to joining but they can still view the forum
- assign senior moderators to the forum that are active lounge members and have been for longer than they've been a moderator
- re-work the lounge rules to better fit the community and the BLUA
- only allow members to post in the lounge once they have read all rules and agreed to them (same system as BLUA)
- clean house if necessary
- Ask for the contribution of lounge members in the creation of the new lounge rules, or at least allow for feedback

As a community based subforum, I believe it is imperative that the rules and regulators reflect the wants and desires of the community members. Moreover, moderators should not be in place to further their own agenda. Rather, they should be around to help further the communities, set up through community rules and regulations.
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Best response I've seen in this thread and one I - admittedly as a Lounge outsider - would suggest seems the blatantly obvious way forward. I don't agree with all of it though...

- Why should TL get special treatment when it comes to senior staff? Phrozen, for example, was on EADD's senior staff team for quite some time and was but one of several avowed Lounge Rats that we have accepted as our - mostly benevolent - overlords. "Understanding" a forum obviously helps when smodding over it but it is by no means necessary when liking it clearly isn't either. A willingness to listen to local mods and find a way to bridge their local concerns to more distant senior staff realms in a reasonably non-antagonistic way is.

- And I would also suggest that insisting members who post in TL have to tick a box somewhere saying they have read and agreed to the forum rules is also nothing more than Lounge Exceptionalism - all BL subforums have particular and unique ways and morays about them but the rest of us get by by simply nudging noobs in the right direction and this seems perfectly reasonable for TL to adopt too.

FWIW. on the more general "What is wrong with The Lounge?" topic... this thread is a fine example. Endless pages of interpersonal bitching and whining back and forth which is both impenetrable and utterly mind-numbing to outsiders. Of course all forums have similar issues but even when things are at crisis point Longefolk cannot seem to drop the bullshit and interact with the outside world even slightly. Obviously that doesn't apply to all who consider TL to be their home forum, but the minority is so vocal as to make it extremely hard to see the signal for the noise.

On a more basic level, for me the problem has never been one of "offensiveness" - this has been a massive red herring the whole time I've been on staff - so much as it has been one of outright bullying. TL has always had a small number of ringleaders who go above and beyond in terms of giving a very strong impression of being vile human beings. Below this rung there are a couple dozen witless sycophants who are even nastier only without any of the wit - admittedly vicious beyond belief wit but wit all the same in many cases - schtick that gives those ringleaders their air of authority. Beyond these you have a layer of perfectly amiable folk who walk the line between the hardcore rattus loungensis and homo sapiens and a whole shitload of wannabees, suckups and prey who go on to make up the next incarnation of the seemingly interminable Lounge hierarchy.

The structure of the place - the rigidly enforced pecking order and way of reaching the "top" - is what ultimately creates and maintains the "Lounge Problem" as far as I can tell. Imo and all that. How to change that? Not a clue. But Bomboclat's suggestions seem - for the most part - to offer a starting point.
 
FWIW. on the more general "What is wrong with The Lounge?" topic... this thread is a fine example. Endless pages of interpersonal bitching and whining back and forth which is both impenetrable and utterly mind-numbing to outsiders.
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For example ....

I dont enjoy coming to the lounge and much anymore I rarely come here at all now. Because I'll post anything. Then every reply has to do with (me being in rehab) (when are u gona relapse)(dwe your a mooch and will never be anything)(you should of died instead)(blah blah blah)I'm not going to lie it's usually phr saying these things and a few others..

I understand the Humor behind it. But its just not funny anymore i don't enjoy posting anymore because it's all the same comments...the horse has been beaten way to hard and now it's just numb and bored to it..and im sure this is what happened to some posters

There's really not much comedy to the lounge anymore.

Maybe because I'm sober,or maybe I'm just over the constant dull attacks I hear on me and various others..it's to a point of bullying almost,it has a feel of malice.
 
^ That's a shame to hear man. Thanks for sharing that. I haven't been around much but I was having a bit of trouble seeing the "bullying" beyond what I considered normal lounge-fare. That is a solid example.
 
Damien said:
^ That's a shame to hear man. Thanks for sharing that. I haven't been around much but I was having a bit of trouble seeing the "bullying" beyond what I considered normal lounge-fare. That is a solid example.
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Don't get me wrong it is normal lounge fare...but it gets to a point where you know what each and every poster is going to post. And when u know what's going to be posted is just regurgitation of spite and mean humor. You kind of lose interest .

It's kinda like a bad relationship

I still love the lounge though...I just feel it's become so repetitive around here people are trying to stir things up maybe a little to much

I may have lost some backbone in my recovery. Or may just be getting old.
 
DrinksWithEvil said:
It's kinda like a bad relationship.
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From what you post this is exactly what it sounds like, a predictable but inextricable struggle that's really not in your best interests. Now, a drug forum may in fact be that for many drug addicts, which is why many of us have left, but if a particular part is doing that, it's something worth thinking about. Thanks.
 
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