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How High Are You? v. Well I'm Pretty Darn High

It is definitely worth it to plan the stuff ahead. And I envy you for being able to drink slowly. I can never do that! I lose all kinds of self-control when taking something, especially so when drinking. Anyway, good luck looking for a job and a place.

OT: codeine kicking in. I don't know what the case with me is, but holy damn do I get high off codeine. Phenibut just adds to the stonedness and anxiolysis very nicely. Going to watch a film now.
 
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Feeling really high off this dope I got fronted - gonna suck paying it back but for now it's a1sincedayone - rip ykm.
 
250mg of tilidine. Feels nice. I don't feel like going back to rehab but I'll have to, I have serious pinpoint pupils which I hope they won't notice. They can take a urine analysis if they want, they won't find this opioid anyway. Hehe.

BD & SirTophamHat; I'll reply to you guys later I'm on my phone atm. ;)
 
^haha that's a good feeling. But it's such a bummer in general dealing with those sober authority figures--I hope you can get out of there soon on your terms.

Ot: still a little spun from last night. Back on the east coast for thanksgiving and was chilling with some old friends--dosed some L in the evening and took so many dabs, came home and was just laying in bed thinking how I'm glad I got away haha
 
It is definitely worth it to plan the stuff ahead. And I envy you for being able to drink slowly. I can never do that! I lose all kinds of self-control when taking something, especially so when drinking. Anyway, good luck looking for a job and a place.

OT: codeine kicking in. I don't know what the case with me is, but holy damn do I get high off codeine. Phenibut just adds to the stonedness and anxiolysis very nicely. Going to watch a film now.

Thank you very much. Most beers I drink are 8-10% and at times it takes me a full hour to finish them. I like to cherish the whole experience. When I drink specifically to get fucked up, surprise surprise, shit gets fucked up. I should watch a movie. I'm watching trigun again for the umpteenth time. I'm trying to think of everything that I should do, and its overwhelming, so I'm just gonna put together a to-do list later when I'm slightly more buzzed.

Whosa with the drug porn!!!! A1 since day one.

FM: did you take off the whole week for thxgivin?? Fuckin rocking dude.
 
IV 0.5 bupe
2mg clonazepam sub'd
cannabis
"old-skool" speed hcl
nicotine via Marlboro Reds

SirTop, when I have the funds I prefer the higher % brews as well, "craft beers". Stouts and porters are my favorite, but I dig a quality (I)Pale Ale as well.

Love the early bupe glow/mood-uplift of the day, always the best dose. It certainly has some stimulatory AD qualities, which is good for the motivation I lack... hah

P2C I might do the whole rehab gig (unless I can just stay on BupeMT) because of court coming up, no bueno.
 
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How long are you in the rehab for, P2C?

It's a 3 months programme, give or take a few weeks. I've been there for 6 (I think?) weeks now. So 6 more weeks.

HYH: Gonna try to actually get clean? Or would you be going just to make 'the man' happy and then carry on using?

Right now it's the latter for me. And in my case 'the man' is my family. :p I want to quit, but I can't quit opiates just yet. Everything else, sure, but opis.. Idk. Maybe I should ask my doctor for buprenorphine maintenance when I get out. I think that might make my life a whole lot better. I'm fine with taking only sub, doesn't have to be super strong opis for me. I'm considering it.
^haha that's a good feeling. But it's such a bummer in general dealing with those sober authority figures--I hope you can get out of there soon on your terms.

Yeah.. They suggested a closed facility for me, I'm looking into the exact programme they suggested, but by the looks of it (so far) it's definitely not something I feel I want to commit to. It kind of sounds like prison, but worse. Lol.

I asked them if I could get into a longer-lasting programme at the same rehab centre I'm at now, but they declined my request. Unfortunate because it might have been good for me; it's more focussed on the underlying issues; for me anxiety and depressed thoughts. But yeah, they declined my request so now I don't exactly know what I'll do yet. Probably I'll just finish my 3 months there and then go back to using opiates non-stop. I will try to keep off everything else though, especially benzos. Needles as well.

OT: Feeling the tilidine nicely. Just had dinner with my dad and his girlfriend; they didn't notice a thing I'm sure, which has reduced my anxiety for later this evening when I go back to rehab. It's always very uncomfortable to come back after a weekend, they always look deep into my eyes and ask me some questions about my weekend. Always makes me nervous, even when I didn't do anything. Lol.
 
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rofl it's quite heavy that you'r eposting here while in rehab. there any hot chicks in with you ? ^. i remember those home weekends. I would sniff just a lil meth on the friday then drink tonnes of water all weekend.
rehab can be pretty nice and safe and shit - no responsibilities - work or bills .
my insurance pays for 30 days all incusive too. Hmmm.

being all scientifical and shit, weighed out exactly 20 mgs of H with half an OC 40 - gonna toot it.

so what Im on now:

H
Oxycodone
Alprazolam
Soon to be loprazolam too.
Caffiene too I guess.

Thank you very much. Most beers I drink are 8-10% and at times it takes me a full hour to finish them. I like to cherish the whole experience. When I drink specifically to get fucked up, surprise surprise, shit gets fucked up. I should watch a movie. I'm watching trigun again for the umpteenth time. I'm trying to think of everything that I should do, and its overwhelming, so I'm just gonna put together a to-do list later when I'm slightly more buzzed.

Whosa with the drug porn!!!! A1 since day one.

A1 since day one baby!!!

I also watch the same shit over and over again. For me it's the sopranos - know that shit word for word by now but i still dig it to unwind after a long shift and the godfather trilogy as well as rambo quadrilogy.

Edit:

eyes are fixed closed.

A1SINCEDAYONE BABY!
 
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Felt really depressed this morning, then quickly got this soaring euphoria with lots of laughing for no reason. It is like there is a telepathic love machine in my town that the hospital uses for mind control to keep you from using drugs. They are obsessed with keeping me sober but my mood started to go down just about half an hour ago. I mixed up about 120g of kratom, by far the most I have ever done, and they turned the machine back on while I was singing a song about overdosing as I was thinking about what pills to take but I am in the process of consuming it anyway. I don't know how the fuck they do it.

I am laughing again but I was feeling happy and sad at the same time before I started mixing the kratom and I could feel the sadness starting to win. I'll tell everyone what this dose of kratom is like with benzos and other pills and coffee and cigarettes and whatever small amount of weed resin and maybe some hydrocodone and phenibut after I finish ingesting all this kratom which will take half an hour and a little bit for it to kick in.
 
someone call the men in white coats !!!

jus joshin trypt, hope u ok.

night all, sleep time. my fav time of the day when i dont have a lot of cash and am counting days down for something i really want/need.

Just fine and dandy :D
Took longer to eat the kratom, just now finishing, but the high is getting nice although my mood got down to a somewhat close to neutral state just a few minutes ago but going back up again.
Will update in an hour or so.

Hope you get that cash soon. I know what it is like to really want something and wait for months because you don't have the money. I'm waiting for shit I want and don't know when I'll have money for it or if I will miss out (that has happened before).

Damn, my mood got really good as I was typing that!

Update:
That is too much, it is making my body shake. I don't know if this could turn into a seizure or not. Took 60mg of temazepam and 150mg diphenhydramine about 15 minutes ago.

Update#2:
I'll be just fine. This is not really fun, there is a dysphoric feeling but it quickly subsided just as soon as I started talking about on Bluelight.

Update#3:
Feeling good and have been for a while now, but this was nothing special. It does not seem any stronger than a 40g dose - it seems like it only created side effects which were scary and unpleasant and I will never repeat this kind of dose again. It is not good for you and a waste of kratom.
 
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Nicotine
coffee
100mg amitryptiline
200mg hydroxyzine
5mg aripiprazole
25mg methadone

need some weed on the top of that
 
Finishing beer, trying to psych up for errands. I have many. Also, debating on DXM. I will wait a while on that one.

Haven't taken more than 7.5mg valium in the last 2+ days so I am happy about that at the very very least. I feel OK.
 
Tha fuck man, I went through like ~10 bars in 2 days. I don't remember SHIT. Pretty sure I got laid though so hell yeah to that. I have a single bar left that will be taken at some point today. Probably gonna get some oxy as well as some nitrous bulbs & chill with these chicks. And of course can't forget the dank. Gunna be a good day (I hope). ;)
 
^Judging by your last few post (and the doses you mentioned in them) it doesn't seem all that bad to me that you've run out of xanax. I just hope you didn't take them long enough to have any serious withdrawals from them. =D

OT: About 0.8-0.9mg suboxone intranasally; feeling pretty good and relaxed. I'm not too high from it, which is good because I have to sell being sober here. :p
 
Ate 45mg dex with lunch. Got stoned earlier, cooking dinner now. Keeping a very slight alcohol buzz going. More weed and alcohol later tonight most likely! Gonna be fun I think.
 
^Judging by your last few post (and the doses you mentioned in them) it doesn't seem all that bad to me that you've run out of xanax. I just hope you didn't take them long enough to have any serious withdrawals from them. =D

OT: About 0.8-0.9mg suboxone intranasally; feeling pretty good and relaxed. I'm not too high from it, which is good because I have to sell being sober here. :p

Sorry P2C I let you down... Took 2mg Alprazolam today and 2mg Klonopin. I actually wish I didn't because I'm really pissed off today. I drove my friend around all day so he could get money for roxis and I didn't get a single thing out of it. Then he went off on ME for a bunch of random shit. Not hanging with him for a while. Idk what to do tonight, maybe drink some beer. Maybe take some dabs. Idk what's gonna happen. Honestly just wanna pass out for a long, long time and not associate with anyone.
 
Just sobered up completely, I guess. Can't fall asleep though, I'll sleep through work for sure. I guess I'll do an army-style powernap.
I'll take a capsule of speed and go to bed, so it'll wake me straight up after a quick refreshing powernap.
 
^You forgot the [/spoiler] :p

OT: Still feeling the 1mg sub from yesterday, not really high but feeling decent.
 
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