I don't mean to ask a million questions but what were your initial symptoms?
Do you think you've recovered fully? Or is it only a partial recovery?
Thanks for responding.
It's no problem - it just may take me a bit to respond if I'm busy with work or spending time with my family.
My initial symptoms were as follows:
- chronic brain fog (cognitive dysfunction)
- chronic uncomfortable awareness of heartbeat (especially when trying to sleep)
- near-constant de-personalization (felt like I was in a dream)
- frequent episodes of de-realization (altered perception of my senses in general, especially feeling/touch and seeing/sight)
- constant feeling of heaviness when standing (as if I was carrying something on my back)
- occasional and spontaneous feelings of numbness and tingling in extremities (mostly my fingers)
- occasional dizziness (feeling as if I was spun in circles)
- chronic difficulty concentrating and/or focusing (couldn't even read one page of a book)
- chronic fatigue and/or low energy levels (constantly feeling tired regardless of the fact that I was well-rested)
- occasional headaches in odd places (e.g. behind eyes, back of head)
- occasional muscle aches & pains (similar to sore muscles felt the day after exercising/working out)
- vivid dreams at times (and they were weird and random)
- chronic depression (due to feeling hopeless + fearing that I'd never recover)
- chronic anxiety (due to feeling hopeless + fearing that I'd never recover)
- frequent panic attacks (due to flashbacks mainly of becoming ill + thoughts of never feeling "normal" again)
- chronic paranoia (due to same reasons as anxiety and depression)
- occasional bouts of insomnia (most likely due to the chronic anxiety and paranoia)
- frequent bouts of acute shortness of breath (brought on by the combination of asthma + distress from LTC symptoms)
- frequent episodes of sudden chills (I have no idea why)
- a lot of mood swings (a result of having to deal with other LTC symptoms)
- a lot of suicidal ideation (for obvious reasons)
- occasional bouts of tinnitus (also known as ringing in one or both ears - I've been told it's known to occur due to stress, high blood pressure, etc.)
- frequent digestion issues (upset stomach, irritable bowel, colitis - not certain why I experienced this but could be due to state of constant distress)
I think I've recovered 99%. I'd say that because, while the LTC symptoms are thankfully long gone now, the truth is that I was
extremely reckless with my short and long term health over the course of several years by way of having consumed (and mixed together) a lot of MDMA, Cocaine, Meth, Alcohol, Tobacco, Marijuana, Opioids, Benzos, Z-drugs, Ketamine, LSD, etc. (and there is absolutely no such thing as a risk free drug). And I have no doubt that all that abuse of my vital organs over such a long span of time has
surely left my body with physical scars. So that's why I say 99% rather than 100.
Edit - By the way, that study you shared with us up above seems to me (based on my own experience) to make sense when considering that it took me a long freakin' time (a little over 19 months / ~578 days) to recover. And damn it, the progress was incredibly slow. There were times/days (I noted them as "bumps in the road to recovery" in my journal) when frustration drove me very close to making a regretful decision (which would have had fatal implications).