• Welcome Guest

    Forum Guidelines Bluelight Rules
    Fun 💃 Threads Overdosed? Click
    D R U G   C U L T U R E

How High Are You? v. Let's get loaded and practice medicine

Status
Not open for further replies.
Drinking beer in an attempt to get tired enough to sleep for at least five hours, gotta work tonight. Last month before I give notice, I think I wanna be a school janitor for my next job :)
 
Carl Landrover said:
Really been trying to get on suboxone. I do good for a few days, but then use. The last two times it's been partially because my friend entices me and it's hard to say no to something that I've done almost daily for the last 3+ years. Once I use that one night it then turns into 2-3 days of using. In about a month it'll be 10 years since the first time I ever felt physical WDs, so opiates have been a big part of my life in the last decade. Actually now that it's October, it's been 10 years since I first tried heroin. I didn't realize Pandora's Box was actually not a box, but a bag. A small stamped bag.

The first stamp name I ever had was "Draft". It had some graphic that seemed war related. Can't remember if it was a gun or something. Since it was 2005 I thought of the draft as in the armed forces are drafting people to fight in Iraq or Afghanistan. Little did I know that "Draft" was a message to me. I was being drafted into the war on drugs. I was fighting for drugs. With that one bag, that draft brought me into a whole new world. I don't know when my tour will be over, but it's been costly.

----
Anyhow...

Am toking up atm. Got off work around 1230, came home and loaded up a shot. Like I said I am trying to stay away from dope and get on suboxone, but one of the other problems is that shooting dope is fan-fucking-tastic. I'd like to say otherwise, but I'd be lying. Slamming heroin. When you read that it probably just sounds like the text it's written in, just like any of the other words on the screen. When I say it though there is this angelic choir singing and these rays of light form and I float away on a warm cloud.
Click to expand...

It seems like a tough fight with yourself. I know the feeling and it's really hard to reconcile the two voices in your head. One saying no while the other one is showing its 'magic'.

It seems you need to pick a side. Never mind the decade. Just try to win this. What matters now is the present and your future. Nothing we can do about the past, except learning from it.

If your friend is an obstacle to your success IMO you should not be together. And if he's really getting in your way, then he's not your friend.

He's just the one who is 'endorsing' the voice you're so courageously trying to silent. Regardless of the good and 'fun-tastic' side of the effects of heroin, I have the impression you are tired of getting fooled by this magic. It's not real and it's making you suffer.

I wish you strength! You can do whatever you want. Do what you are really trying to. You can do it!
 
Last edited:
6gs of Maeng Da kratom, which just arrived this morning. It's just now starting to kick in. I've got a nice buzz coming on. :)

I got stoned for the first time in about 2 months last night. I forgot how great THC is with a low tolerance. Smoked a couple blunts with a few friends and took a couple dabs. I was high as a motherfucker haha. Also did a little bit of cocaine and drank 4 or 5 beers. I was mostly just baked though. It was fantastic.

Now I'm just relaxing this morning on this kratom, watching Narcos on Netflix. It's a great series, I'd recommend it for anyone on here. Later I'll find something to get into I'm sure. It feels good to be able to do what I want again. Being locked up sucks. :\

Hope everybody else is having a good day so far.
 
Just had a 25ozer of 8% abv... mmm high gravity liquor. And bong rips :)


Windy, grey and gloomy day here over in Boston too
 
Still feeling the clonazepam from yesterday, took a couple codeine pills and vaped a lot of quality hash.
Smoking a spliff now, probably not the best idea cause i have a cold...But im feeling good!
 
100mg clorazepate and 2mg suboxone. I'm on a quick taper. Quite comfortable at this point, but that won't last too long I guess, it's not supposed to though. ;)
 
^i might try subs (again) soon.

Might get some this week. Might get a new oxy rx aswell too. Good to have both i rate. Cos then the sub taper is voluntary not forced.

OT: high on oxy 40 mg IR, high quality #4 heroin 200 mgs +- and 3 mgs of loprazolam (is my second fav benzo to midazolam) is a hoot of a time esp in this combo.


Weeeeeee. Nod in nod out, someone refill my script before I freak out!
 
Had my dose of Sub this morning, which didn't give me a buzz or nothing(besides that energy boost the first few hours) and I think 10 or 12mg of xanax throught the day(4mg first dose, 2mg second dose, 4mg 3rd dose...wanna say I had 12mg but I think just 10mg) and now just took some Ibuprophen(30 mins before the Gaba,chewed) with 900mg of Gabapentin(soda shot method). These two things really do make it stronger it seems, not in my head..just relaxed now, but hoping I catch a nod, bout to dose 900 more mg of Gaba, thinking of taking 2100-2400 alll together, then take two more footballs and hopefully nod, or if not that feel fuckin good cuz large dose benzos and gaba do that to me...why oh why will my doc just not give me my subs 800mg of Gaba to take 4 times a day and 6mg of xanax along with 6mg of klonopin, and some adderall 30's for good measure...would never touch oxy or stuff like that again...for a while anyway.
 
Im hiiiiiiigh on cocaine. finally did a speedball (coke and aome good raw. --when is raw not good!?)

Did 4 more shots of cocaine. meant to save all, then half, then one shot...for tomor. sadly that didnt happen.
200mg seroquel. i will probably take 100mg more but Im nervous cuz my alarm is set to wake me with enough time to get ready and do my last shpt of h before my parents arrive tomor. ahhh!

my heart.boom boom. boom. maybe I shoule take somw gaba. yes.. 8 600g gaba
 
^ 8 600g gaba?

Sorry to jump in like this. I can still vividly remember awful mornings after 'speedballs' nights. I never really understood why I was doing something that you can't ever be satisfied with.

I'm glad this is over now. The word relief is the one that comes to me when I think of that.
 
Pill2Chill said:
100mg clorazepate and 2mg suboxone. I'm on a quick taper. Quite comfortable at this point, but that won't last too long I guess, it's not supposed to though. ;)
Click to expand...

Tapering off subs/opioids? Or zo's too?

OT:
The other half of an OP 40/20mg oxy xr (just for the sake of easing the WD's) and I'm getting ready to pack a bowl because I feel the relief kicking in. It's sad how such a small dose of an opi hitting my receptors makes me go from bedridden to up and highly functional. On the third day of my kick/Friday I slipped up a little and sniffed some dope, the detox was acute enough for me to just act on impulse. Nodded like a bitch when I threw some lorazepam and doja in the mix.
 
Last edited:
^Both. I'm kicking a 3 month habit, so it should be a cakewalk compared to the detox I went through last year. Doesn't feel like a cakewalk right now, but it's definitely not nearly as harsh as the last time. 100mg clorazepate is a generous amount to start tapering from, so right now i'm not really detoxing from the benzos yet. I really can't complain about the meds they give me, and they actually listen if you tell them they're cutting your dose too fast. It's actually quite humane here when I think about it.
That doesn't make it any less sad that I'm back in rehab already, but better this I suppose than dragging it out for another few years (which I could have if I wanted to) and having another detox from hell.

I take it you're feeling well right now with the oxy in your system, are you trying to kick opis for good, or are you just doing a tolerance break or something like that? In any case, good luck with that mate and hang in there! ;)
 
Status
Not open for further replies.
Top