☮ Social ☮ PD Social Thread: Engage the digital super banana

[pharmakos]

we give life and then don't feed it
its all smothered beauty

 

[theacidtest]

So... I just had the "I do LSD" talk with my girlfriend. Didn't go great but could have gone worse. She's never even smoked weed and doesn't know anything at all about psychedelic drugs. She was pretty upset at first, but I explained myself pretty well and she said that she wants to know more about it and understand why I choose to do it. I've been stressing pretty bad about this discussion, but it had to happen. I love doing LSD and I'm majoring in synthetic organic chemistry, so obviously it's not something I could or would want to keep secret.

All in all I suppose she handled it pretty well, considering that she doesn't know anything about LSD other than "it's an illegal DRUG!". It helps that I generally have my shit together I suppose. I look and act pretty normal, have my own house, I'm an army veteran, and I have a genius level IQ. So obviously it's not a problem in my life, which she was able to grasp pretty easily.

Still, that was a very stressful conversation. But it needed to happen. I'm not ok with dishonesty. LSD has been a major part of my life, keeping that from someone I care about just feels wrong. Even if it fucked up the whole relationship, I'm just not ok with keeping secrets. I considered waiting a long time to tell her, but ultimately felt that the longer I waited the more it would seem secretive and dishonest. I think everything will be fine though. We have a pretty caring and honest relationship already, she made it clear that while she doesn't know much about it and was shocked, she's very happy that I was honest and truthful with her.

 

[Thorns Have Roses]

So, I've learned that my sister was admitted to the hospital with a 108 degree fever earlier today, and we haven't heard from her since, or even know what hospital it is (somewhere in San Diego). I am a firm believer in the capabilities of modern medicine, but I must confess that I'm scared.

some theories guess that jesus went to southern asia and learned about buddhism during that time

What's so impressive about this Buddha guy? Pythagoras came up with the same shit at the same time or earlier. He also had some cool things to say about triangles. Anyway, Jesus strikes me as a guy who had a mystic experience that he wasn't intellectually prepared to handle (at least, from the perspective of my naturalism it reads that way, I'm more into allegorical/mythological interpretation of these things).

 

[Cream Gravy?]

So... I just had the "I do LSD" talk with my girlfriend.

I remember when I had that talk... I came back from my first festival and I just couldn't keep it in any longer. I had started trying psychs after we had started dating though, so I had actually held off on telling her for at least a year after my first trip... I remember it used to fuck up my come-ups every single time, sitting there worrying about my girlfriend and how she would hate me for tripping, and how on Earth I was gonna send her a coherent goodnight text while peaking hard on acid... when I finally came forward, she was more angry that I had withheld it than that I had actually tried LSD. Now I let her know when I'm gonna be tripping, and she's generally cool with it, though to be honest I think she dislikes it at times solely because it means it's time I'm gonna spend with friends or alone rather than with her hah.

 

[Bagseed]

^ I hope everything is gonna be okay... my sis had typhoid fever when she was in India, I know that feel. :/ (she survived it, thank god)

 

[Xorkoth]

the funny thing is, at its core, christianity was originally very liberal. one of the main lessons jesus taught is "don't judge others." part of the reason christianity gained so much popularity was because judaism had SO MANY rules to live by. jesus kept it simple -- live and let live, treat others how you would want to be treated, and its all good.

modern christianity, of course, has seriously overcomplicated, obfuscated, and bastardized the original messages of christianity. anyone who uses their belief in christ as their justification for imposing their own beliefs on others has seriously got christ's message all wrong.

Indeed... it boggles my mind how these hate-filled judgmental bigots can read the NT and somehow justify to themselves that their attitudes are anything but 180 degrees away from what Jesus was saying. There's a handful of people in the P&S forum at times who are the same way. It makes absolutely no sense, there's no logic involved, it's just another excuse to be hateful.

I've read about that and there's actually a decent body of evidence to support it. Regardless, the core teachings of the Christ of the new testament and the teachings of Buddha overlap in many key areas.

I believe there have been a variety of enlightened souls who had the general pattern of then attempting to spread that message. None of them are special over the other ones, and it's unlikely, IMO, that any of them intended for an organized religion to be formed around their teachings, I think their purpose was to help people achieve their own personal spiritual understanding. If Jesus could see the religion that formed around him today, he'd be disgusted, I think.

So... I just had the "I do LSD" talk with my girlfriend. Didn't go great but could have gone worse. She's never even smoked weed and doesn't know anything at all about psychedelic drugs. She was pretty upset at first, but I explained myself pretty well and she said that she wants to know more about it and understand why I choose to do it. I've been stressing pretty bad about this discussion, but it had to happen. I love doing LSD and I'm majoring in synthetic organic chemistry, so obviously it's not something I could or would want to keep secret.

All in all I suppose she handled it pretty well, considering that she doesn't know anything about LSD other than "it's an illegal DRUG!". It helps that I generally have my shit together I suppose. I look and act pretty normal, have my own house, I'm an army veteran, and I have a genius level IQ. So obviously it's not a problem in my life, which she was able to grasp pretty easily.

Still, that was a very stressful conversation. But it needed to happen. I'm not ok with dishonesty. LSD has been a major part of my life, keeping that from someone I care about just feels wrong. Even if it fucked up the whole relationship, I'm just not ok with keeping secrets. I considered waiting a long time to tell her, but ultimately felt that the longer I waited the more it would seem secretive and dishonest. I think everything will be fine though. We have a pretty caring and honest relationship already, she made it clear that while she doesn't know much about it and was shocked, she's very happy that I was honest and truthful with her.

That's good man. I kept it from my ex for a long time, well, not entirely, I told her right off the bat when we met/got together and she was super judgmental about it (basically told me that's stupid and for kids and she doesn't respect it at all)... that was in college and I didn't trip often at all then, so I would only do it when she was out of town and I'd tell her I was going to and it would cause some strife but it didn't come up a lot. Then we graduated and moved away together and I got into RCs and started tripping more often. At that point I decided it would be "easier" to just not tell her about it, so it started this years long secretive pattern that was very destructive to myself and our relationship. It was totally wrong of me to do, even though it was also wrong of her to judge me and try to dictate what I could and couldn't do.

So, I've learned that my sister was admitted to the hospital with a 108 degree fever earlier today, and we haven't heard from her since, or even know what hospital it is (somewhere in San Diego). I am a firm believer in the capabilities of modern medicine, but I must confess that I'm scared.

Oh wow, that's a really high fever... I wish her well.

 

[Thorns Have Roses]

^Turns out to be influenza, so some antipyretics, tamiflu, and rest have things under control.

Ya'know, my mother always told me not to operate light switches with wet hands lest I electrocute myself, I've always thought that was total BS, until today. LOL it was quite sh---surprising.

It makes absolutely no sense, there's no logic involved, it's just another excuse to be hateful.

Yeah, I wonder what being religious even means to your average self-declared believer of an organized religion. How many truly try to embody the ideals of whatever scripture and prophets/saints are relevant to them? More broadly, how many people truly try to live ethically, how many bother to consider morality more deeply than that some things are good and others are bad? Not that I'm any better, on balance I'm worse than the average person.

 

[Just A Guy]

For me, as a Catholic, I affirm that I believe in God, the Father almighty, creator of Heaven and Earth, that I believe in Jesus Christ, his only son, my Lord, born of the virgin Mary, was crucified, died, was buried, rose from the dead, and is now seated at the right hand of the Father; that I believe in the Holy Spirit, the holy Catholic Church (that is follows its lineage from the original disciples of Christ), the communion of Saints, the forgiveness of sins, the resurrection of the body, and everlasting life. That's my faith, the faith of my church, and I'm proud to profess it, regardless if I admit that the Church requires faith, that belief in God requires faith, that belief in Jesus, as the son of God, requires faith. But to respond to Thorns' comment above, I do try to avoid sin (I let myself fail sometimes, that's the nature of my weakness), I try to lead a noble, compassionate, honorable life with love as its basis (acceptance is my own decision), and believe many others among Bluelight behave similarly. I was Agnostic for many years, an Atheist for one, and within the last three years ago, experienced a moment (as most of us in PD have done) that changed my outlook.

 

[FlawedByDesign]

I am going to word this terribly but the there is no doubt in my mind God is real. IMO karma is the hand of god and I am constantly amazed by how swift and precise his hand can be. EVERY time I have ripped someone off or beat someone more than I should have in a fight I have been repaid in full. A recent example is me ordering mxe after I swore to my significant other that I would never order it again and the next day I almost lost my job.

 

[psood0nym]

I am going to word this terribly but the there is no doubt in my mind God is real. IMO karma is the hand of god and I am constantly amazed by how swift and precise his hand can be. EVERY time I have ripped someone off or beat someone more than I should have in a fight I have been repaid in full. A recent example is me ordering mxe after I swore to my significant other that I would never order it again and the next day I almost lost my job.

Applied selectively I can see belief in "karma" being sort of beneficial overall, however when it's taken as a principle at work in the world universally it manifests itself psychologically much as the "Just World Hypothesis" does. If we get what we deserve then so does the battered wife or child ... Why help them or stop the perp if they're paying their karmic debt and the abusive husband and father is acting as collector?

 

[LSDMDMA&AMP]

Dogs.
im sick manedogs
but the pens are on.

 

[Xorkoth]

I am going to word this terribly but the there is no doubt in my mind God is real. IMO karma is the hand of god and I am constantly amazed by how swift and precise his hand can be. EVERY time I have ripped someone off or beat someone more than I should have in a fight I have been repaid in full. A recent example is me ordering mxe after I swore to my significant other that I would never order it again and the next day I almost lost my job.

I believe that there is no monotheistic god, who is male (or female) and a singular entity with opinions and sway over the lives of people. I believe that god is the universe itself, the force of life and consciousness in all living things. I love the core message of Christianity though, I was raised Christian and after a period of rebellion I have seen that it brings a lot of good to a lot of people, and that a lot of people really do use it to live lives full of love and goodness.

 

[Cream Gravy?]

Any of y'all tried out legit edibles from Colorado or some legal state? My coworker went to Colorado recently and brought back candies, cookies and other shit, and I managed to get 3 individually packaged cookies and a 5mg thc chocolate off him. (how much is 5mg thc in terms of high???)

I've been abstaining from cannabis recently, for a number of reasons, the most primary being that I experience extreme social anxiety and self-criticism when high these days. So, gradually my tolerance is going down, and I'm honestly a bit worried about whether these edibles will be weak, or in fact too much to handle. I've smoked, dabbed, etc. in the past but never really eaten weed.

What do y'all think of edibles, and more importantly, what do you think of recreational edibles legally sanctioned by any state government? I'm honestly not sure what to expect!

 

[pharmakos]

well, i just acquired 250mg of 3-MeO-PCP.

lord forgive me if that was a bad idea.

 

[Cream Gravy?]

^People talk about 3-meo-pcp pretty frequently here I feel like. I'm interested in trying other dissos, especially given my lack of MXE or ability to obtain MXE, but to be honest the stories surrounding Diphenidine, MXP, 3-meo pcp and the like sound rather frightening and very dissimilar to MXE. I'm thinking of maybe investigating MXM, seems more up my alley, and of course Ketamine if I can ever find it.

 

[pharmakos]

3-MeO-PCP is a completely different beast than any of the other dissociatives i have tried. dissociative cross-tolerance doesn't even seem to apply to it. i have abused DXM pretty regularly for years, and MXE on and off for almost as long. i can take 150mg+ of MXE and be pretty coherent. i can take a gram of DXM and be alright. but even as little as 10mg of 3-MeO-PCP is very active for me. i wonder if 3-MeO-PCP's receptor binding studies were either wrong, or perhaps they missed something... it can definitely make you psychotic if you push the dose too high.

last time i had the stuff i had been unemployed for years and had way too much free time, and ended up compulsively redosing on it. its weird, i never felt very compelled to take the first dose of it. but once i was high on the stuff, i ended up taking more and more... this time around, though, i've been working for a year and otherwise have a lot more responsibilities in my life. i plan on limiting my use to weekends. since i started working, i have a very strong instinct to avoid things that will make it difficult to work the next day. i'm pretty sure this is going to work out well this time.

 

[Xorkoth]

I bet it will too, you seem like you're in a much different place. I really want to try 3-MeO-PCP... well, I did try it, when I received a small sample before it was being sold anywhere, but it came with a strong caution... I started with 2mg, then tried 4mg, then tried 7mg, all separate occasions, and it was always underwhelming but felt nice. I want to give it a proper try sometime.

As for edibles, I haven't tried legal edibles but I hear good things. Edibles can be much stronger than smoking/dabbing, but only if you take enough to get that strong... at lower dosages it's actually quite a bit less anxiogenic and feels different from smoked.

 

[Cream Gravy?]

Xorkoth, this may seem weird, especially since I've never met you, but I had a dream last night in which I perceived a long haired dude who I was apparently doing dissociatives with (think it was MXM? Weird too because I've never done MXM...) as being you. And funny enough your name was Xorkoth and not whatever it is in real life. And you were living in a duplex and were for some reason a college student. It was really confusing. You had an angry roommate too, until he realized... his parents weren't home?! It was so damn strange. It was a lot longer and more detailed, but my dreams slip from me so quickly. I should try writing them down more often.

 

[Xorkoth]

Haha, that's funny. :D My dreams usually slip from me quickly too, except on my ibogaine flood dose and for a while afterwards. During ibogaine, I dreamed of willow, an older poster who's not active anymore named egor, and alasdairm the admin as this friendly caterpillar-like creature who hung from the ceiling and discussed philosophy.

In reality my hair has been down to my shoulders but never longer. I'd do dissociatives with you though.

 

[Cream Gravy?]

In reality my hair has been down to my shoulders but never longer. I'd do dissociatives with you though.

Hah I'd call that long. That's about where my hair is at right now. I'm not sure whether or not I should keep on growing it and just see what happens, or cut it shorter again, given the quickly approaching warm weather. I might have to start doing a small pony tail to keep it from my face, or maybe a hairband. Right now the cold weather makes it possible for me to wear a beany all the time in public.... but at home, I put on one of my girlfriend's old hairbands and look silly