☮ Social ☮ PD Social Thread: Engage the digital super banana

[Xorkoth]

I used to use my ex's bobby pins sometimes at home when my hair was long because it aggravates me when it gets in my face, it gets wavy when it gets longer and it goes right into my eyes in the front. Right now if I pull my front hair down it goes about halfway down my nose... I'll probably cut it again this spring at some point and then let it grow until next spring, that's usually what I do. This winter I cut it for my sister's wedding.

 

[Just A Guy]

Haha, that's funny. :D My dreams usually slip from me quickly too, except on my ibogaine flood dose and for a while afterwards. During ibogaine, I dreamed of willow, an older poster who's not active anymore named egor, and alasdairm the admin as this friendly caterpillar-like creature who hung from the ceiling and discussed philosophy.

In reality my hair has been down to my shoulders but never longer. I'd do dissociatives with you though.

I remember that from that amazing novel-of-a-trip-report you wrote about your flood dose of Ibogaine.

 

[Thorns Have Roses]

since i started working, i have a very strong instinct to avoid things that will make it difficult to work the next day.

Man, my instincts tell me to stay up late pursuing ebreity before work the next the day.

In reality my hair has been down to my shoulders but never longer.

I cut my hair down to .5" every 6-9 weeks. Actually I'm not sure how frequently I do it, but that seems a reasonable guess.

 

[LSDMDMA&AMP]

Dogz
whatsup

 

[Yeetbeat]

Hai2u Llamabro

Just got back from gym. Squats over my lunch break fucking SUCK. Especially when I'm trying to total more every single session >.<

How's everyone else going?

 

[Xorkoth]

I go the gym during my lunch break too. Usually anyway.

 

[Yeetbeat]

haha yeah I'm in that "usually" boat too....I probably shouldn't, though, given I've got my own power rack, olympic bar, 160kg of plates, and adjustable bench in my garage. lol.

 

[Cream Gravy?]

I don't work out very often at all. Usually I go on one week, off for an elongated period kinda thing. I'll get motivated for that one week then I'll start feeling low in myself again and just give up for far too long. I can't put on fat to burn anyways, it sucks.

 

[Xorkoth]

I have no fat to burn either, I primarily work on building muscle (especially my core which has made me feel SO much better and stronger). And also cardio so I don't get tired and everything is easier. Cardio makes me feel the best but lifting is great too. The first week is the hardest, after a few weeks of doing it often it becomes a nice routine that you enjoy. Or that's how it was for me. Granted, I was never like this before, I did the same as you or even less... for some reason I came out of ibogaine with the powerful understranding that in order to live and healthy and happy life, and a long one, I need to get and stay in shape.

 

[Cream Gravy?]

The understanding of the need to be fit is there, I just have so much trouble motivating myself to even cook myself dinner these days. I'm a very unhealthy weight, in the opposite sense of every other American right now. I wish so effing bad that when I ate, it would stay in me and I wouldn't just shit it right out. This girl at work commented about my always asking about if food in the back is up for grabs (I eat the whole time I'm at work lol) and I was just like... Well, it doesn't do me any good. Just comes right back out.

 

[Just A Guy]

Eat... shit... am I missing something?

 

[Cream Gravy?]

I'm saying my body moves it out too quick and I don't retain any nutrients. I eat more than many fatter people I know and yet I'm usually around 120-125 pounds at 6 foot 1....

 

[pharmakos]

since i started working, i have a very strong instinct to avoid things that will make it difficult to work the next day.

Man, my instincts tell me to stay up late pursuing ebreity before work the next the day.

the two aren't necessarily mutually exclusive more of a spectrum than a black and white thing. i usually do get slightly intoxicated in some form every night after work, but never so much that i end up having difficulty performing the next day.

I'm saying my body moves it out too quick and I don't retain any nutrients. I eat more than many fatter people I know and yet I'm usually around 120-125 pounds at 6 foot 1....

do you have irritable bowel syndrome? perhaps even just taking a tablet of immodium every day would slow your digestive tract down enough that you would be able to retain nutrition.

 

[FlawedByDesign]

Dumbell military press and upright rows make for an extremely effective shoulder workout.

 

[Cream Gravy?]

do you have irritable bowel syndrome? perhaps even just taking a tablet of immodium every day would slow your digestive tract down enough that you would be able to retain nutrition.

I'm not sure. I never go to the doctor, I need to see both a psychologist and a physician very badly of late but I've done neither because I always end up thinking I can solve my own problems. Clearly I'm wrong though...

 

[Thorns Have Roses]

What is this working out? I've never managed a regular exercise regimen for more than a few weeks. OTOH I don't own a car, so I walk everywhere. That counts for something, I guess.

I need to see both a psychologist and a physician very badly of late but I've done neither because I always end up thinking I can solve my own problems.

In retrospect, one of my stupidest decisions was trying to think my way out of my mental illness. I mean, I had no idea just how far outside [consensus] reality I had ventured, I only knew from the technical definition that I had a personality disorder of some sort.

 

[pharmakos]

I'm not sure. I never go to the doctor, I need to see both a psychologist and a physician very badly of late but I've done neither because I always end up thinking I can solve my own problems. Clearly I'm wrong though...

does cannabis help your eating/digestive issues?

What is this working out? I've never managed a regular exercise regimen for more than a few weeks. OTOH I don't own a car, so I walk everywhere. That counts for something, I guess.

the best shape i've ever been in my life came about because i lived 4 miles out of town and had no car. used to walk into town every day. lost like 40 pounds.

 

[Cream Gravy?]

does cannabis help your eating/digestive issues?

To be quite frank I can't tell one way or the other.

To put it into perspective though, I was a daily smoker for 4 years up until recently, and my appetite/speed of digestion simply seems to go up when I'm in the midst of being a stoner. I over eat when I smoke (I'll literately eat till I'm sick at times of extreme stoned-ness), but I maintain the exact same weight and still shit 3-5 times a day. Now that I'm sobered up, I eat a little less and shit a little less, but maintain the same low weight. As a kid I was never diagnosed with anything, my pediatrician just said I had a speedy metabolism.

I really think it might be my genetics to over simplify it, but I don't know anyone else in my family with quite the same trouble gaining weight. My dad said he was thin as a kid, but I can see that his metabolism has clearly caught up with him, and I'm hoping mine will too some day.

In retrospect, one of my stupidest decisions was trying to think my way out of my mental illness. I mean, I had no idea just how far outside [consensus] reality I had ventured, I only knew from the technical definition that I had a personality disorder of some sort.

My girlfriend is insisting I call our university's Center for Psychological Counseling tomorrow. Hopefully they can offer some aid. I'm just really skeptical of psychologists/psychiatrists; when I was a teenager I saw a number of them for help, and they all just acted like I was some stupid teenager who didn't know shit and had trivial problems. Well guess what assholes, I still have the same problems years later, so you should have helped me instead of belittling me... That's why I haven't sought aid for years... I always figure they'll be the same as they were years ago and just give me a "Get over it" kind of argument, which never effing helped. One psychologist back then also tried to act like my slipping grades were the issue; I was like, "No lady, I couldn't give two shits about my grades, I'm fucking depressed and suicidal, why would I care about school?!" Clearly I haven't had good luck with people from this field of medicine.

 

[theacidtest]

Good mental health professionals are very rare, sadly. It's a shot in the dark trying to find a compassionate and competent person in the field. I used to suffer from very bad clinical depression. No professional ever helped me, I ended up self medicating with LSD and spending a lot of time in nature. That helped more than anything else ever could have.

Not to change the subject or boast, but I had a magical evening. After work tonight, my girlfriend and I each drank a couple of beers, played pool, and then made love for an hour and a half. I used to always despise the term "making love" and felt like it was just sappy sentimental BS. But that's the only way I can describe what happened tonight.

 

[Cream Gravy?]

I know what you mean about "making love"; making love and having sex are two different things in my book.