February - Getting and staying clean/sober thread

[Maya]

Good Morning, everyone.

Wow! I wish I was there right now that's a very beautiful place

This is the 40th day that I haven't had a cigarette. Time flies by

 

[neversickanymore]

^Damn I jealous,, nice fucking work!!


24 more

 

[Maya]

^That's so cool man! Where d'ya get these pictures!

 

[neversickanymore]

I came across a whole stash of them look at the i need to post thread.. links at the bottom of my post.. national geographic

 

[Maya]

That's so cool and awesome, believe it or not it helped me a bit to ease up my mind looking at those pix.

Still not feeling the greatest but fighting the urge to slip. I think I should just sleep earlier tonight so I can forget about this and feel better tomorrow. Goodnight guys stay strong.

 

[deltakappamu]

^ this is a lovely idea.. I am going to try and do the same.

 

[neversickanymore]

right guys, when we look out at all the wonders the world has.. all it amazing things its hard to see any truth in what we run from and really hard to see all the bad we can look at. It is what we make and how we choose to see it.

 

[RedLeader]

Ya....seven billion strange looking things roaming around on a rock that is spinning and flying through an infinitely large space of mostly emptiness. And nobody really has any clue why. And what we deceide to do is put one another in cages to suffer more when we take something that makes coping with the unknowns just a tiny bit easier. Absolute insanity.

I left my phone at home today. Great start to my day. Hopefully things will improve from here forward.

 

[Eveleivibe]

Addy hon no one here can advise rather or not you should go on suboxone unless they truly know you or your situation. I may be biased here with what I'm saying so please keep that in mind. Most people go on suboxone because of the physical addiction, fear of withdrawals n as a mean of harm reduction.

It really depends on a number of factors really. What you are taking, how much you are taking, the dangers with what you are taking - for instance does it contain a lot of paracetamol which could kill your liver if more than 4g per day, can the substance be cut with something lethal ie fentanyl that sort of thing, lastly how strong is the psychological addiction "the obsession to use," are you using more n more? Is history repeating itself?

What have you done in terms of after-care? Counselling? NA? Other interventions?

Going on suboxone should be a last resort if you find you cannot stop n you have tried everything in your power then do suboxone but until then look for other ways. I say this because you've no longer got a physical addiction n adding suboxone would obviously add that to the mix with possible side affects along with trying to find the right dosage for you. But please don't rule it out as a possible option if all else is not working.

Take care,

Evey xxxx

 

[Mr.Scagnattie]

Ya....seven billion strange looking things roaming around on a rock that is spinning and flying through an infinitely large space of mostly emptiness. And nobody really has any clue why. And what we deceide to do is put one another in cages to suffer more when we take something that makes coping with the unknowns just a tiny bit easier. Absolute insanity.

I left my phone at home today. Great start to my day. Hopefully things will improve from here forward.

Ha. Yeah man it really is crazy when you think of it that way, in that kind of big picture, cosmic "who the fuck are we?" thought. Insanity indeed.

 

[ad lib]

Addy hon no one here can advise rather or not you should go on suboxone unless they truly know you or your situation. I may be biased here with what I'm saying so please keep that in mind. Most people go on suboxone because of the physical addiction, fear of withdrawals n as a mean of harm reduction.

It really depends on a number of factors really. What you are taking, how much you are taking, the dangers with what you are taking - for instance does it contain a lot of paracetamol which could kill your liver if more than 4g per day, can the substance be cut with something lethal ie fentanyl that sort of thing, lastly how strong is the psychological addiction "the obsession to use," are you using more n more? Is history repeating itself?

What have you done in terms of after-care? Counselling? NA? Other interventions?

Going on suboxone should be a last resort if you find you cannot stop n you have tried everything in your power then do suboxone but until then look for other ways. I say this because you've no longer got a physical addiction n adding suboxone would obviously add that to the mix with possible side affects along with trying to find the right dosage for you. But please don't rule it out as a possible option if all else is not working.

Take care,

Evey xxxx

Thanks Evey

I don't have after care counseling, though I should...I basically suffered in silence when I was IVing because fear. Fear of judgement, etc. Never been to NA before either. I don't know what to do I feel lost and like I'm slipping back into old ways...

My pills contain 500mg paracetamol per pill...so...I've taken up to 4500mg paracetamol per day before, for like a week straight. So that's like 31,500mg per week. Fuck. I never looked at it like that before. Do you think my liver is slowly dying? Now I'm worried.

 

[neversickanymore]

Ya....seven billion strange looking things roaming around on a rock that is spinning and flying through an infinitely large space of mostly emptiness. And nobody really has any clue why.

this is great and i will think of it the next time I feal lonely.

24 more you all.. and this includes 24 more hours down in this good awful winter.. But I saw that crested butte had like six feat of snow in a couple of days.. lovn freshys their you good people.

To the rest of us SWEETDREAMZ.

 

[Eveleivibe]

Thanks Evey

I don't have after care counseling, though I should...I basically suffered in silence when I was IVing because fear. Fear of judgement, etc. Never been to NA before either. I don't know what to do I feel lost and like I'm slipping back into old ways...

My pills contain 500mg paracetamol per pill...so...I've taken up to 4500mg paracetamol per day before, for like a week straight. So that's like 31,500mg per week. Fuck. I never looked at it like that before. Do you think my liver is slowly dying? Now I'm worried.

There are harm reduction method, and I may get stick for this, like cold water extraction but I don't know how good the method is really, I've used it myself but I don't know how much paracetamol it really gets out n have been ill from it a few times. While you're doing this is there a way that you can get the pills without the paracetamol to protect your liver or go on a low dose of suboxone to give yourself time to get counselling n so forth without having the cravings to worry about. I'm sorry you've chosen to go through this alone, abby, because you seem so sweet n need some help. You deserve to be happy.
I know a lot may not agree with me about the suboxone method but I'm suggesting it as a possible means of harm reduction n as a tool to help you while you work through why this is all happening n set some

Thinking of you,
Evey xxxx

 

[Mr.Scagnattie]

Thanks Evey

I don't have after care counseling, though I should...I basically suffered in silence when I was IVing because fear. Fear of judgement, etc. Never been to NA before either. I don't know what to do I feel lost and like I'm slipping back into old ways...

My pills contain 500mg paracetamol per pill...so...I've taken up to 4500mg paracetamol per day before, for like a week straight. So that's like 31,500mg per week. Fuck. I never looked at it like that before. Do you think my liver is slowly dying? Now I'm worried.

Geeze. Ever here of a CWE? Hah. Damn.

 

[RedLeader]

I feel lost and like I'm slipping back into old ways...

You gotta tell that new boyfriend of yours that you have problems with addiction. You don't necessarily have to tell him that you are presently injecting (if you are injecting again? and assuming you're not sharing needles?), but just that this has been a problem for you for a while now, and you're helping yourself by being honest about it. Relationships are meant to be two people helping each other. You don't know how much he could help you until you let him try. Or if he reacts badly, you cut your losses without losing any more of your precious time. But ya, I'm sure that being withholding about this is causing you anxiety, guilt and shame. Which of course only keeps the loop of addiction spinning.

 

[Eveleivibe]

You gotta tell that new boyfriend of yours that you have problems with addiction. You don't necessarily have to tell him that you are presently injecting (if you are injecting again? and assuming you're not sharing needles?), but just that this has been a problem for you for a while now, and you're helping yourself by being honest about it. Relationships are meant to be two people helping each other. You don't know how much he could help you until you let him try. Or if he reacts badly, you cut your losses without losing any more of your precious time. But ya, I'm sure that being withholding about this is causing you anxiety, guilt and shame. Which of course only keeps the loop of addiction spinning.

Is this true, addy, are you feeling guilt n anxiety because your fella doesn't know. Red no offence but we don't tell people what to do, we advise them. It's up to ad whether or not she tells her fella. She's only been with him awhile n may not feel ready to tell him yet. Do you feel that you'd like him to know yet? Red is right, if you tell him he may be a good support for you n if he's funny over it then he's not worth it but if you feel you're not ready to tell him yet as things are in the early stages that's up to you. Only you can decide this.

 

[RedLeader]

It was a suggestion. In person, I'd elbow her and smile as I said it. Perhaps that was lost through internet communication. It's her business if she tells him or not, I am just saying that I believe that in doing so, she would be helping herself.

 

[Eveleivibe]

It was a suggestion. In person, I'd elbow her and smile as I said it. Perhaps that was lost through internet communication. It's her business if she tells him or not, I am just saying that I believe that in doing so, she would be helping herself.

Ah I'm sorry. I take things literally sometimes. You're a thoughtful person, sorry if I caused any offence xxxx

 

[Just A Guy]

Calling my girlfriend over and letting her know all about my chem use was tremendously beneficial to our relationship, and it really empowered my decision to kick stims. I still let her know when I experiment with psychs, even if it's a few days later. She's remarkably understanding. A true keeper.

Ad lib, I can feel your distress over this. You're gonna be OK, lil seester.

 

[ad lib]

Geeze. Ever here of a CWE? Hah. Damn.

Haha I know, it's terrible... I'll have to search on here about how to do it. I just don't wanna lose any hydrocodone and fuck it up.

You gotta tell that new boyfriend of yours that you have problems with addiction. You don't necessarily have to tell him that you are presently injecting (if you are injecting again? and assuming you're not sharing needles?), but just that this has been a problem for you for a while now, and you're helping yourself by being honest about it. Relationships are meant to be two people helping each other. You don't know how much he could help you until you let him try. Or if he reacts badly, you cut your losses without losing any more of your precious time. But ya, I'm sure that being withholding about this is causing you anxiety, guilt and shame. Which of course only keeps the loop of addiction spinning.

Is this true, addy, are you feeling guilt n anxiety because your fella doesn't know. Red no offence but we don't tell people what to do, we advise them. It's up to ad whether or not she tells her fella. She's only been with him awhile n may not feel ready to tell him yet. Do you feel that you'd like him to know yet? Red is right, if you tell him he may be a good support for you n if he's funny over it then he's not worth it but if you feel you're not ready to tell him yet as things are in the early stages that's up to you. Only you can decide this.

Thanks you guys and JAG too I'm going to tell him- it's a great suggestion Red, thanks for opening my eyes! Hehe He should know, especially since he said he wants a long term and serious relationship with me. I'm not currently injecting, just taking orally, but he still should know. Y'all are so right that I'm probably feeling guilt and anxiety over this. I can always count on my BL family that's for sure. I'll have to ponder how to bring it up to him.